I could feel him moving beneath me before he pulled me away from the wall, and I grabbed onto his shoulders as he moved me down his body.
“Where are we going?” My voice was so sleepy and satisfied as he carried me.
“I need to get inside you,” he growled against my neck. “I feel like I’m dying.” He laid me down against the staircase. My ass hit the stairs before my shoulder blades pressed against the ones above it. Carson kneeled between my thighs, and he stared up at me as he quickly unbuttoned his jeans.
He paused just as he pulled out his cock, and he stared up at me. “We can’t do this.”
“What do you mean?” I leaned forward and wrapped my hand around him. He leaned forward into my touch, and I ran his cock against me. He slid through my wetness, back and forth from my clit to my opening, and I was dying for him to push inside me.
I had just come, but I wanted more. I was desperate to feel him inside me. I needed it.
“Allie.” My name sounded painful on his lips. “I wasn’t expecting this. I didn’t bring a condom.”
I heard what he said, but there was no rational thinking left in my brain. I didn’t care about the stupid condom.
“Don’t come inside me.” I leaned back again and lifted my shirt to expose my stomach and breasts. “Come here.” I ran my fingers over my skin and to my breast. I pinched my nipple between my fingers as he watched me.
“I’ve never.” He shook his head. “I’ve never fucked anyone without a condom. I’m clean.”
“Me neither.” I smiled at him, and his lips tugged up on the side. I pinched my nipple again and I could feel the ricochet of my orgasm throughout my body. I tightened my thighs around Carson’s hips before sliding my other hand down my body.
He was still watching me, and I couldn’t take another second of it. I needed more. I slid my fingers over my clit and cried out at the feeling.
“Are you going to make me fuck myself?” I asked him before I thought better of it, and I could feel my embarrassment creeping in. I had never been so forward with Carson, with anyone.
“Fucking hell.” Carson moved over me, and his mouth slammed against my mouth. He lined himself up before sliding into me with one long push. It felt so different than the last time, so much easier, but there was still a bite of pain.
“Oh, God.” I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck as he began moving inside me.
He had one of my thighs in his hand, spreading me open for him, and he didn’t stop kissing me. Not even for a moment.
My pussy clenched around him. I was still so sensitive from when he just ate me, and I already felt like I was on the brink of another orgasm.
“Nothing has ever felt this good.” His words rushed out against my mouth, and even though I told myself not to believe him, every word felt like a shot to my chest. “This is what it should have always been.”
Don’t let him fuck with your head, Allie.
He lifted off me, moving to the stair at my side, and he grabbed for me. He pulled me over him until my thighs were straddling his, and he lowered me back down on him. He felt so much deeper like this.
I pushed my hands into his shoulders as I stared down at where we connected as I began to move. He gripped my ass in his hands and lifted me slightly before letting me fall back down against him.
Over and over, he helped me until I got the hang of the rhythm he set, then I took over. I rode him as he lifted my shirt and cupped my breasts in his hands. His fingers rolled over my nipples before his mouth pressed against the fabric of my bra.
The feel of him so deep inside me combined with the torturous gentleness of his mouth and hands was too much. I stared down at him as I rode him, and I didn’t see the Carson who was capable of breaking my heart at every turn. I saw the Carson that I had fallen in love with a long time ago.
The one I couldn’t seem to shake no matter how hard I tried.
I kept the pace as my heart thundered in my chest almost violently. He clung to me as if he was worried I would disappear at any moment, and I held him because I knew that fact to be true.
My orgasm coursed through my body, this one unbelievably stronger than the last, and I cried out his name. He didn’t stop moving beneath me. He gripped my neck in his hand and forced my mouth down to meet his.
His kiss felt like a promise that I didn’t believe, his hands a vow that I couldn’t accept.
I tried to shield myself from both, but it was futile.
They flooded me without my permission. They suffocated me despite my armor.
“Oh, God, Allie.” Carson’s words were rushed and frantic, and I felt him come inside me only moments after I fell over the edge.
His arms were wrapped around me, and my forehead was pressed against his. I didn’t have the courage to open my eyes yet or to utter a word. I just sat there and tried to calm my masochistic heart.
I could feel him shift beneath me, and the proof of the mistake we had just made leaked down my inner thighs. It was enough to make me come to my senses.
I climbed off of him before he could stop me, and I quickly grabbed my clothing from the ground. I glanced up at him long enough to see the panic in his eyes, but I didn’t linger there. I couldn’t.
“Allie.” I heard him call my name, but I didn’t stop. I finished getting dressed without even taking a moment to clean up, and I searched for my purse so I could leave.
“Baby. Please, stop.”
I spun around to face him, and he was jerking his pants back up his hips. “I am not your baby.”
I tried not to think about the look on his face as I walked away and made my way to the door. I could feel him following me, but I knew I couldn’t stop. If I stopped for him, I knew I wouldn’t be able to walk away.
“Please don’t leave, Allie.”
Every part of me wanted to turn around and stay, but I couldn’t. I wouldn’t survive him again. So, I did the one thing I knew he was the master of, I walked away.
Chapter Six
Carson
I twisted the joint between my fingers as I tried to ignore my dad.
Apparently, Coach had called him about me getting benched, and I really wished he hadn’t. My dad didn’t give a shit. Not really. He just wanted to pretend he did. He just wanted something to be angry at.
Because he was always fucking angry.
“Are you done?” I looked up at him because I hadn’t been listening for the last five minutes.
“Carson,” my mother gasped my name, and I stared over at her. She looked worse than normal. Her hair was a complete mess and looked like she hadn’t brushed it in days. She was in her robe even though it was only nine o’clock, and I wasn’t sure if she had even changed out of it today.
“What, Mom?” I searched her face for a trace of the woman I loved, but it was so damn hard to find her anymore. “You can’t seriously expect me to sit here and listen to him.” I laughed before looking back to my dad.
“Aren’t you a little lost anyway?”
“I am your father.” His face was so red, and his fists were clenched at his sides.
That was always his answer. I am your father. As if that simple fact was supposed to mean something. He hadn’t acted like much of a father in years.