“It’s all right. I just didn’t know how to handle so many presents, so I hid under the table until I could come to terms with them. That, plus so many people!”
“You’ll have to get used to it,” my husband warned.
“I don’t have to get used to it right now. Well, mostly. I have to tolerate turning the hotel into a circus, though. I’m going to French braid his snakes.” I bounced on my toes. “He’ll look wonderful with French braided coral snakes. And unlike him, his snakes like it.”
“They like it because you cuddle with them and don’t fall over dead if they bite you.”
“That does help. I’ve figured out they have to bite something now and then or they don’t feel well. His serpents give a nudge and a hiss when they need to bite. Yours whine.”
Quinn sighed. “Do you want me to work on that? We have ways of draining our venom, you know—ways that don’t involve you being bitten.”
“Why would I want you to work on that?” Had my gorgon-incubus doohickey lost his mind? I frowned and considered him. “Are you feeling okay?”
Quinn’s parents snickered, and his mother caught me in a hug and pulled me in the direction of the crowd loitering around waiting for the demonstrations to begin. “Ignore him. He’s not happy unless he’s fussing about something. I was warned my children would be weird. My fathers did their best to prepare me for that reality, but nothing prepared me for Sam, and his sisters are something else, too.”
“I haven’t even met his sisters yet,” I replied. “When can I meet them?”
“They’re around, probably trying to seduce strippers in a different hotel. One of them got the bright idea to start a competition.”
My eyes widened. “To seduce strippers?”
“Samuel got the lion’s share of angelic tendencies. His sisters are wicked little seductresses, probably to balance out how goody-goody Sam became.”
“Mom,” my husband complained. “My sisters are not out seducing strippers, are they?”
“They really are. I can’t even blame them. We went to a strip club and got a very pleasant surprise. Vegas has some nice men. How could I deny them? They wanted to enjoy the local offerings. It’s not my fault you’re the only one of my children who has decided marriage is interesting.”
According to Quinn’s sigh, his family would break him sooner or later. “I can’t believe you brought my sisters to Vegas. They’ll take it over, and once they get bored, they’ll probably destroy or sell it because they have nothing better to do, and there’s no adult supervision here to convince them it’s not a good idea to sell or destroy an entire city.”
“Don’t say such mean things about your sisters. It’s your father’s fault they’re so randy. It’s a gorgon thing.”
Quinn’s father shrugged. “Says the daughter of an incubus.”
“Well, that didn’t help matters any, that’s for certain. How did you turn out so angelic, Sam? Where did I go wrong with you?” Without waiting for her son to reply, Quinn’s mother dragged me through the crowd, who wisely made way for the insane woman on a mission. What her mission was remained a mystery, but I’d find out soon enough.
Three
I don’t know what I did, but I’m sorry.
Quinn’s mother dragged me to a mat placed disturbingly close to the canal’s edge and shoved me in the general direction of my husband’s grandfather, who kept me from falling on my face or plunging into the water.
“I don’t know what I did, but I’m sorry,” I whispered to the gorgon.
Archambault Quinn patted my shoulders. “My little grandson’s mother is energetic, and she shares certain tendencies with her angelic father. As such, she is hoping all of her eligible offspring start producing children in high numbers.”
“Well, I’m married to a gorgon-incubus doohickey, so if she’s expecting anything less from her son, she’s even crazier than I am. Considering how often I ask to fight for the right to claim baby gorgons, I don’t even know what she’s thinking. I’m concerned for Sam’s sisters, though. His mother said they were out to seduce strippers?”
The gorgon pointed to the other side of the canal, where an entire gaggle of dark-haired, tall, and beautiful women bounced behind a cordon the hotel had set up to keep people from falling into the water. “She lies. Those are his sisters. The younger ones are with my bride, who would rather not see me fight with you, as she’d be torn over joining in. As she doesn’t know if she wants to fight with you or defend me, I suggested she take care of the younger girls.”
My eyes widened, as they were all feminine versions of my husband. “They certainly look like they could seduce any stripper they want.”
“And they have their fair share of incubus genes, so they’re quite adept at finding men when they want them. Thanks to those genes, they’ll likely become surrogates for hives, as they have inherited tendencies from both sides of the family. Little Samuel is unfit for such a life. His sisters are quite interested, if you please—or even if you don’t. They didn’t inherit any dignity from either side of the family.” The gorgon sighed.
“What are we waiting for?”
“Local law enforcement to oversee everything. It should only be a few more minutes now that you’ve arrived.”
I nodded, and as I had nothing else to do, I went to work greeting all of Archambault’s serpents, noting most of them were primed to bite. “Is this demonstration to see how many times a coral snake can bite me before I start frothing at the mouth? Their sacs are full.” The worst of the lot made a forlorn hiss and nuzzled my hand. “Look at him. He’s going to burst if he doesn’t bite. The poor baby. How could you be so cruel to him?”
“I’m sure he’ll get his chance to bite you soon enough. You wanted a fight, and since I can’t petrify you, I came prepared. I have arranged for a little angelic and devilish help on that front, however, as I’d rather you not literally froth—and it will allow some of the humans to experience a gorgon’s bite without death being involved. There is paperwork for most humans, as the partners of those bitten must consent to a heightened chance of pregnancy.”
I bet the Devil had participated in the creation of that scheme, making full use of the ten minutes his wife had taken her eyes off him. “Seriously? What did you do to your poor snakes?”
“Rather than your typical response to my venom, you’ll find you’ll become quite interested in my little grandson, rather irresistibly interested. I will cruelly win this fight through the unfair usage of your husband’s body.” The gorgon smirked with zero evidence of shame at the underhanded tactic. “Their venom production was modified to become a rather potent aphrodisiac partnered with a little angelic magic. I have been told if my bride does not get to enjoy the consequences of this meddling, I will be very unhappy for the rest of my vastly shortened life.”
The Devil and his brother truly loved me and wanted me to be happy. “Have fun, Archambault. For some reason I don’t understand, I even like you, so I’d be sad if you got kicked to death by your centaur bride.”