“Told ya,” I said to Ash. I linked my arm through hers and pulled her into the club.
My whole bride squad followed me down the hall to the VIP lounge.
The door slammed shut behind us.
“Why’s it so dark in here?” asked Ash.
That was a good question. I was used to mood lighting in fancy clubs, but this was a bit extreme. I used the light on my phone to locate a light switch.
But when I flipped it on…something seemed very wrong.
“Oh fuck,” I muttered. Because this wasn’t like any VIP lounge I’d been in before. The wooden benches and metal bars had more of a jail cell vibe. I thought back to my plans for the night and nodded. Actually, this seemed just about right. We were right on time.
“Sex gulag?” asked Slavanka. “Or real arrest?”
Ash started fanning her armpits. “I never thought I’d say this, but I hope you lured me into a sex dungeon.”
I decided that leaning into the fake arrest thing would be the most fun for everyone. It would be so unexpected when we arrived at our final destination. I pretended to try to open the door that we’d just come through, but it didn’t budge. “Oh no,” I said. “Yelp didn’t say anything about sex dungeons, so I’d say we got busted for those fake IDs.”
“No. No!” Ash was pacing so fast. “This can’t be happening! I’m not built for prison.”
“Chill, girl. No one is going to prison. Single Girl Rule #29…”
“Every girl deserves a big cock on her birthday,” said Slavanka.
“What?” asked Ash. “How does that apply?”
“We no get big cock in lady prison. So sad.” Slavanka slumped down on a wooden bench.
“That’s Rule #38,” I corrected. “Rule #29 is single girls don’t get speeding tickets.”
Ash shook her head. “Flashing your boobs might work to get out of a little speeding ticket, but using a fake ID is a way bigger deal. Is it a felony? What if it’s a felony?”
“Then I’ll call Daddy and have him fix it,” I lied. Daddy could not know about this. He’d be angry with me. I wasn’t supposed to go out on weekends anymore. Or was it weeknights? Maybe it was all of them… “Or I could just blow the cop. Hmm…yeah, that sounds more fun.”
“What if there’s more than one?” asked Ash. “Cops usually travel in twos.”
“This is ridiculous,” Esme said. “I’m over 21. Besides, there are five of us. We could take care of the entire station if we had to.”
Shhh, don’t give away the surprise! I gave Esme a high five. “Yeah we could! See, Ash? It’ll be fine.”
A door on the other side of the room opened and two cops stepped through. They were both well over 6 feet and absolutely rocking their uniforms. If I didn’t know better, I would have thought they were strippers dressed as cops. Which totes made sense.
“Good evening, ladies,” said the hotter cop. His badge said King on it.
“Hello, officer,” I said. “How can we help you?”
“Well,” said Officer King. “We got a call about some girls using fake IDs. Any idea why we might have gotten a call like that?”
“No clue,” said Esme. “There must be some sort of mix-up. We’re all legal.” She pulled out an ID and held it through the bars.
The other officer - Officer Grant - grabbed it. He shined a light on it and flipped it over. “It’s legit,” he said eventually.
Of course her ID was legit. Esme and the other flight attendant were well into their twenties. Unlike us college freshmen. Was it already time for sexual favors? According to my itinerary the real fun didn’t start for another hour or so.
Officer King said something, but I didn’t really hear it. I was too busy picturing how nice it would be to sit on his beautiful face. He had perfect lips. Not too big and not too thin. And that smile… Yum.
“Well?” he asked, staring at me.
“Yes, Officer?”
“I asked to see your ID.”
“Oh, right. No problem.” I pulled my dress down and shook my tits at him. “How’s that?”
The corner of his mouth ticked up a little. He hit a button on the wall and there was a loud buzz and a click. Officer Grant slid our cell open.
That’s right. The girls work every time! Especially after my new diet of meat and bread. They were better than ever.
“Thanks, boys,” I said. “Just let us know if there’s anything else we can help you with.”
Officer King grabbed my arm as I passed.
God he’s strong. His fingers were just rough enough. And the scar on the back of his hand showed he was a real man.
“Where do you think you’re going?” he asked.
“To party my face off, clearly. Wanna join?”
“Hmm, try again.”
“To… To jail?” stuttered Ash.
“Bingo,” said Officer King as he slapped some cuffs on me.
God, I loved being handcuffed. I just wished he’d tighten them a little more. Soon I’d be screaming his name as the metal bit into my skin. I gave him my sauciest wink.
They cuffed the rest of my girls and led us out to their SUV. They piled us all into the back and sped off.
“I officially hate you,” said Ash.
I patted her leg. “It’ll be fine. They probably just want to show us off to all the other guys at the station.” Ash was so gullible. I couldn’t wait to see her expression when she saw our final destination.
“Are you sure? Because it really seems like we just got arrested for real.”
“Na. They didn’t read us our rights or anything. This isn’t a legit arrest.”
“Oh my God.” Ash went even paler than usual. “Oh God. Oh God. What did Ghost say to you about that kidnapper when we got off the plane?”
“Just some silliness about Daddy’s rival’s enforcer being in Miami tonight. But he was definitely just looking for an excuse to have us not go out tonight. Ghost hates fun.”
“What if those officers didn’t read us our rights because they aren’t actually officers? What if they’re the kidnappers?” Ash hissed.
“Then I hope they treat me the way Ghost said they would.” I fanned myself thinking about being double-teamed by those hot cops.
“Chastity!” whisper-yelled Ash. “This isn’t a joke! And why are the windows blacked out? Is that normal for a cop car?”
“Huh.” I pressed my face to glass but I couldn’t see a thing. “No, that’s not normal.” This was so much more sexual than a normal cop car. And it probably cost four times as much. Hadn’t Ash ever seen the back of a gross cop car before?
“They take us to sex gulag?” asked Slavanka with a big smile.
“Worse,” whispered Ash in the most dramatic way possible.
“Oh, come on. There’s only a very small chance that we just got kidnapped. But if we did, it’s gonna make for the most epic bachelorette party story ever.”
“That would be pretty epic,” added Esme. “For what it’s worth, Zoraida and I are both black belts. So if those hot cops are kidnappers, then they’re about to get their asses kicked.”