Now, hell, now I have no idea what his game is. It’s like he enjoys winding me up and letting me go, watching me spin in circles before falling off the ledge.
Five minutes bleed into sixty and then ninety. The silence between us is heavy. There are so many things I want to say, so many things I want to know. We are near the back of the plane while the others are all toward the front, now would be the perfect time for us to hash this shit out but per usual, everything is left unsaid.
Paxton doesn’t acknowledge me even once throughout the entire flight. Hell, he doesn’t even take off his headphones until the pilot comes over the intercom announcing that we’re getting ready to land.
Even then he doesn’t even look my way, let alone speak. I don’t know why it pisses me off so much. Aren’t I the one that asked for this?
As we start are decent downward, I have accepted that this is just how things are going to be. I am fully prepared to exit the plane without so much as one more word spoken between us. That is, until I hear Paxton shift next to me and then feel his breath hot on the back of my neck as I stare down at the city below me.
“Incredible isn’t it?” He purrs, causing my skin to prickle. “I love how alive the city looks from up here.”
“Yeah.” Is all I can manage, my breath catching when I feel his hand settle on my thigh as he leans over me to share in my view of the city.
“I know you’re angry with me Charlie.” I keep my eyes locked on the window, knowing if I turn my head that his face would be just inches from mine. “I know I have a habit of fucking things up no matter how hard I try not to,” he continues. “Just know that this—” His index finger touches my jaw just seconds before he’s turning my face toward him. “This is not a game to me. You. You’re not a game.”
“I…” My words stick in my throat and I can’t seem to get a single one of them out.
“Let me finish.” He presses his finger gently against my lips, silencing my struggle to speak. “I don’t know what this is between us Char. I’ve been trying to shake you for years and I just can’t do it. I can’t promise you the stars and the moon. I can’t tell you that everything is going to work out in the end. All I know is that right now, I want you.” He drops his hand away but his face still lingers so close to mine that I find it difficult to breathe properly.
His confession has sent my heart galloping so hard against my ribcage that I swear it’s going to beat straight out of my chest at any moment.
“And I think you want me too,” he adds.
“I… I don’t know what I want.” I stutter out, finding it impossible to think clearly with our close proximity.
“I think you do.” He inches closer toward me. “I told you the other night, I’m done fighting this,” he says, for the first time addressing the text message he sent and never explained. “I meant that. I want to know what this is Char. This feeling. I have to know.”
“And Gavin?” I address the elephant in the room.
“He doesn’t need to know, at least not yet. No one does. This can be our little secret.” He slowly closes the small amount of distance between us, his lips touching mine for the briefest moment before he pulls away.
“Okay.” I breathe the word without a second thought.
My brain screams in protest but right now my heart is in control. I can’t fight this. I never could.
Paxton’s smile spreads across his entire face. Just the sight of it causes a flurry of butterflies to explode in my stomach.
Just when I feel like the world might allow me to simply float away, the plane jolts slightly, the wheels connecting with the runway as it lands. The sudden movement jars me out of the moment and I look around, for the first time in several moments really acknowledging where I am.
I shake my head, trying to pull myself back to reality. It isn’t until I catch Paxton’s gaze, his incredible smile still spread across his face, that I realize none of this is a dream. Paxton really did say all of those things and I really did just agree to what—a secret relationship with my brother’s best friend?
My eyes dart to where Gavin is now standing, preparing to exit the plan, back to Paxton who squeezes my hand and winks before also standing. Back and forth my focus switches between the two men, the reality of the situation really taking hold.
At the end of the day Paxton can only have one of us. If he chooses Gavin, he will lose me forever. If he chooses me, he risks losing Gavin forever. I just can’t help but wonder if I am really worth that risk.
Chapter Five
Paxton
It’s been hours since we landed in Vegas early this afternoon. Hours and yet I’ve only seen Charlie about sixty minutes of that time, and that was during lunch where everyone in our group was present. Not an ideal time or place to talk about what I said on the plane or what that really means for us.
She left directly after lunch to go dress shopping with the other girls and has been gone for the entire afternoon and now into the early hours of the evening.
I honestly don’t know what got into me on the plane. Even now I find myself second guessing my actions. I swore to myself when I was packing this morning that I wouldn’t pursue Charlie any further. But after sitting next to her in such close proximity for the entire morning, my resolve just seemed to melt away.
My actions at Gavin’s a few nights ago, and the text messages that followed, I had convinced myself were a product of too much alcohol and the severe lack of companionship I have been suffering from over the last few weeks. Of course, I know that’s not the truth. And I also know that the lack of companionship is by my own doing.
Ever since Charlie came home, no other woman has really sparked my interest. Deep down I know it’s because I have placed Charlie on this untouchable pedestal and now that she’s back in my life, no one else can hold a candle to her.
She’s all I want. Hell, she’s all I have wanted for about five years now. The last three years were at least tolerable without having her around. I didn’t have to see her every day. I didn’t have to look at her full, pink lips without being able to kiss them. I didn’t have to stare at her perfect skin without being able to touch it. I didn’t have to watch a loose piece of brown hair blow across her face and not be able to reach out and tuck it behind her ear. Life was just—well, easier.
“Paxton.” I hear Decklan’s voice just as he knocks on the door of my hotel. “Hey, open up.” He knocks again.
I push myself off of the too firm mattress and cross the space of the room. I’ve never stayed at the Palazzo before and I have to admit, it’s pretty fucking sweet. I’m the only one of our group that has my own room. Of course Decklan and Kimber are rooming together, as are Gavin and Harlee. And to save money Charlie and Angel got booked together, though I know for a fact it has nothing to do with money and more to do with Gavin wanting someone present to keep an eye on Charlie. He would never admit to that but I know how he operates. He worries about her a hell of a lot more than he would ever lead on.
Pulling open the door, Decklan steps inside the moment he has enough room.
“You get settled?” He asks, stepping into the foyer before letting the door close behind him.