I knew Kelsey well. She had been coming into the clinic for as long as I had been working there and years before then even. I met Jason a few times when he came in with her to drop off or pick up her rabbits, and in all honesty, they were the best couple. Jason doted on Kelsey and vice-versa, the perfect couple much like every other couple at the compound. There was something to be said for alpha protective men.
“Aww Bunny, don’t. There is no reason for you to feel any kind of guilt or blame, you did nothing wrong, honey. It was all him, his decisions, his fault. This isn’t something new to the club. He has always hated them, choosing to judge his family not for what they did or stand for but because they ride bikes and wear leather cuts.”
“Why?” I asked, loving that Rafe was still holding my face between his large hands, bringing our heads close, so close that I could see the different shades of green that made up his beautiful eyes.
“Don’t know honey, all I do know is he has been like this since I started coming here when I first joined Team FIVE. I gave him a wide-birth whenever I came to the club, not because I was afraid of him but because I saw something in his eyes I didn’t like.” Rafe stopped and abruptly sat back from me, taking his hands away from my face leaving me missing his touch.
“Come on Bunny, let’s get you home. I’m sure your pack of wolves will be wanting their dinner by now.” Rafe attempted to hide the seriousness with some humour, but something in his eyes had me worried, so worried I asked the question in hindsight I probably shouldn’t have.
Getting to his feet, Rafe held out his hand to me, his big one engulfing my tiny hand.
“What did you see Rafe, what was in his eyes?” Letting him pull me to my feet, we started to walk slowly through the club’s garden. Flowers and vegetables grew abundantly, thanks to both Stella and Kelsey. The other women in the Flock contributed, but the success of the sustainable garden belonged to the wives of the former president and the club’s resident cop.
Rafe looked down at me, his green eyes, usually so vibrant, turned dark and uninviting.
“Evil, Peyton, I saw evil.” A shudder ran through me, not because of the way Rafe said the word evil or because he knew that Justin was evil, it scared me because I came face to face with that evil, but somehow I was hoping it was all in my head and that night had just been a one-off occurrence and a madman wasn’t still out there somewhere wanting to finish the job he started.
Shrugging my shoulders a few times in an attempt to shake off the dark turn our conversation had suddenly taken, I walked along beside Rafe, our hands still clasped.
“How was your mission?”
“Eventful, objective achieved,” Rafe answered in his usual way every time I asked him about his deployment.
“Good. Did you bring me anything back?” I giggled when he groaned quietly, but still, he nodded his head.
“Yes, but being in the middle of nowhere in Africa, I’m afraid what I brought back for you isn’t all that exciting.” Letting go of my hand, Rafe reached into his pocket and pulled out a green and black rag. Transferring it to his other hand, he took mine back in his and laced our fingers again.
“Here.” Holding the cloth out to me, he indicated with his chin to my free hand, which I held out.
Words Rafe, words would be useful sometimes, I muttered silently to myself.
Unravelling the cloth, Rafe dropped a medium-sized stone onto my palm. The brilliant purple shone and sparkled with the sun’s rays penetrating through the beautiful gem.
“Oh my god, Rafe! This is gorgeous. What is it? Where did you find it?” I gushed, running my thumb over the sharp edges of the stone. It was rough and smooth at the same time, the colour was purple, but it was also so much more than that. Varying shades of lavender were scattered between the deeper purple, making it the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
“It’s a raw tanzanite gemstone, and I actually found it on the ground while we were out doing a scout. I couldn’t believe it when I saw it just sitting on top of the sand right there on the rocky trail. Kind of reminded me of your hair colour when I left,” he winked at me, then did something I was still getting used to–he reached out and caught one long curl around his forefinger and stroked it. “Now it’s pink.”
Swallowing the giant-sized lump in my throat, I nodded, then closed my hand around my present.
“Yeah, I kinda felt like a change,” I told him in a gravelly voice I didn’t recognise. The Rafe I observed around the compound was completely different from the one I got to be with one on one. With me, he was soft and gentle; he touched me, held my hand, touched my hair, cuddled me while we watched TV. The other side of him was less comforting and more hard-edged, he stood away from people, the only interaction I saw was with his team. The single women who came to the club tried to spark up conversations with him, but Rafe rarely, if ever, engaged in any kind of talk with them. Most of the time, he walked away while they were talking to him, and if I was close and he saw me, he would make his way to me and stand behind me. Was he using me as a shield? Whatever it was, Rafe did not talk to women except me, and sometimes Addy.
Despite our steadily growing friendship, I didn’t know that much about what made Rafe … well, Rafe. We spend a lot of time together over the last six months, but most of that time was a comfortable silence, him asking me questions, television and yardwork around my house. He never divulged personal information, voluntarily or with prodding. My questions went unanswered the majority of the time, but I wasn’t giving up.
“Your hair is longer than before I left for Africa. Are you growing it?”
“Maybe, I haven’t decided. Are you staying in town for a few days before you head back to the base?”
“No. I have to take off in the morning for a couple of days, and then on the way back, I will drop in and say hi before continuing to Queenscliff. We have a training exercise in conjunction with the Navy and Air Force. Not my idea of fun, but a requirement.” I immediately latched onto the out of town comment, it was one he told me often but not where he went. I ached for him to trust me enough to tell me more about himself, about the man out of the uniform, more than what I had learned on my own.
There were so many things I wanted to ask him. Where did he go when he left Ballarat? Why doesn’t he talk about his personal life? And why did his eyes say he liked me, yet he refused to make a move?
It’s not like you are being completely honest with him either. That intrusive and annoying voice in my head taunted me. I had secrets I was keeping close to my chest, secrets that no one, not even Addy knew.
Hello pot, meet kettle.
Rounding the corner of the main building, I noticed the party was still in full swing. Members, friends and families cluttered the asphalted quadrangle, kids playing adults while laughing and chatting loudly. It was a beautiful scene, but not mine, not when I noticed Jason and Kelsey sitting at one of the picnic tables, the redhead on her husband’s lap.
“Meet me at your car, Bunny,” Rafe whispered in my ear, his warm breath tickling my skin, his hand tightening around mine. “Go inside and head out the back door in the kitchen, it leads directly behind the quadrangle and to the car park.” Rafe saw my hesitation, and I knew he could see it written all over my face. Jason and Kelsey were such wonderful people, and I couldn’t help feeling ashamed that I had been avoiding them since the night at the clinic. Their whole world was being turned upside-down and here they were part of a club that was protecting me from their own son.