The Olympics have been my dream
since the first time I watched them on TV.
I’m not sure Mom believes I’ll make
it, but she gets me to every practice.
Plus every lesson, recital, rehearsal
and meet. She says she’s my chauffeur.
Dad says he’s my biggest fan.
I cross my fingers he’ll be there.
Misty says superstitions are for people
who don’t know better. She’s right.
Still, what can it hurt to maybe
have a little extra luck on your side?
Dad never used to miss my competitions,
let alone random birthdays or holidays.
Sometimes he does now. He always
apologizes and means it, but . . .
I gave up on Fourth of July picnics
and Easter egg hunts a long time ago.
But when I turned eleven, my party was two
weeks late so he could be there.
Patience isn’t my best thing, but I waited.
For Dad.
Definition of Zombie:
One of the Living Dead
I think about Dad
as I take a before-bed shower.
I know he has
to work
to pay the bills
not to mention for my
training
gear
and costumes.
One time he joked, Who
knew tiaras were so pricey?
“Even though I hardly ever
wear one,” I answered,
and we all laughed together.
That doesn’t happen
so much anymore.
I wish we could be
like we were before.
When
each day was routine
and
life had a solid rhythm.
When
everything was easier
and
all of us were happier.
After Aunt Caryn died,
Mom went blank like a zombie.
Every little bit of happiness
drained right out of her.
Definition of Disruption:
Trouble
Little by little, Mom got
her smile back,
but she still hasn’t found
the desire to teach dance again.
Dad says she’s too fragile.
I want my strong mom back.
Maybe he could be home more.
Of course, Cal would still be here.
One of the worst arguments
I’ve ever heard my parents
have was over Cal moving in.
Dad was not thrilled.
I don’t think it’s a good idea,
Taryn. The boy’s disruptive.
But Mom said there wasn’t
another choice. He’s my nephew,
Bruce. It’s here or foster care,
and I won’t let that happen.
I promised my sister he’d be okay.
I never broke promises when
she was alive. I won’t start now.
After that, they said a few
words about Cal’s father,
but when they noticed me
eavesdropping, they went silent
for most of the day.
I wonder if Dad stays away
more now so he doesn’t have
to deal with the disruption.
Definition of Desperate:
Frantic; Hopeless
I turn off the shower,
grab a towel, and as I’m drying
myself, there’s a loud knock
on the bathroom door.
Save some hot water, okay?
“I always do,” I yell back
at Cal. “I’m not the rude one.”
Except I kind of am
when I slowly put on
my pj’s, brush my teeth
and comb my hair.
When I finally open
the door, Cal is hovering
right there outside it.
“Are you, like, stalking me?”
Uh, no. I’m, like, waiting
for my turn in the bathroom.
Good thing I’m not desperate.
I know he means “not
desperate to use the toilet,”
but I pretend I don’t.
“You are totally ‘desperate.’”
He knows I’m using the funny
“no hope for you” definition.
So why does he look smacked
down? And why, as Mom
tucks me in, do I feel happy
about that? That bothers me.
Maybe I am a little mean.
FACT OR FICTION:
I Went Without a Toilet for Two Weeks
Answer: Fact, unless you count peeing
in alleys and sneaking into fast-food
places to do number two.
But that isn’t something
I talk about. In fact, only
one person knows it’s true,
and with luck (fingers crossed),
I’ll never see him again.
One thing’s for sure.
I learned how to hold it.
So waiting for Hannah is
no big deal, except I get
she’s procrastinating.
That means “dawdling,”
as Mrs. Peabody might say.
Taking her own sweet time.
She thinks
it’s funny
and
I deserve it.
She thinks
it bothers me.
What she doesn’t get is,