“Yep, five years. Apparently, he stopped seeing her for a year when we first met but then picked things up again.”
“Holy shit,” Lindsey whispers. “Why are you here? Why are we even having this party?”
“Good question,” I say, raising my eyebrows. “I told Mom and told her that I didn't want to go through with it anymore. I wanted to call it off and I don’t want to have this stupid engagement party. She said that I can’t unless I come here and tell everyone myself. In person.”
8
Emma
Lindsey puts her arm around my shoulders. I don’t have anymore strength within me to hold it all back so tears start to flow.
“It's okay, it's okay,” she repeats herself over and over again, but somehow her support makes it worse. Maybe worse is the wrong word. More painful.
We’ve never had much of a sisterly bond. We grew up together but we were never that close.
No matter what Lindsey says, I can't stop myself from crying and the tears continue to run down my face until my eyes are red, bloodshot, and completely puffy.
Suddenly, the closet door swings open and Mom comes in. Dressed in an impeccable Donna Karan suit, she looks like she could be one of the Real Housewives of Calabasas. Her hair is cut right below the ears and styled in such a way that not a single strand is out of place.
She’s not surprised to see me even though I am surprised to see her.
“Alex and his family are waiting for you downstairs,” Mom says nonchalantly.
It's almost as if she knew that we would both be here.
“She told you what happened, right?” Lindsey comes to my defense. “How could you make her go through with this?”
“Lindsey, you of all people should know that men are not perfect.”
I glance over at my sister and peer into her eyes.
“What is she talking about?” I ask her quietly.
She ignores me, but tells Mom, “She cannot marry him if he's cheating on her.”
“I'm not telling her to marry him. I'm telling her that we are not making a spectacle of this party. You and I have both worked really hard on it and we have people who have traveled from miles to get here. They stood in line at the airport. They got on airplanes. The least that we can do is to offer them some hors d'oeuvres, some nice music, dancing, and the view of the ocean. That's the least we can do.”
I shake my head. She should be on my side, but of course she's not.
“In the meantime, you need to fix yourself up. You can't go to your engagement party looking like you just found out that your fiancé has been cheating on you.”
I glance at my reflection in the mirror.
I look ragged and exhausted.
I look like I haven't slept in days.
“I'm going to buy you some time, but I expect you downstairs in half an hour looking like the most beautiful bride-to-be that anyone at this party has ever seen.”
I nod my head slightly, not really agreeing, but not really fighting her either.
I'm here.
Alex is here.
My family is here.
His family is here.
Why not just get this awful night over with?
Twenty-five minutes later, I walk downstairs looking like someone I have never looked like before.
My face has been airbrushed with foundation along with some sort of sparkling powder that makes my cheekbones look like they have been elevated by two inches.
The makeup artist has even applied makeup to my chest and the curve near the top of my breasts to make them look bigger and rounder.
My hair has been straightened and styled to make it fall softly around my shoulders. I'm dressed in my mom’s little black dress. It's one of her many and it's one of the bigger sizes that she owns.
Luckily, Lindsey found it in the back, otherwise I'd be stuck with some sort of loose-fitting floor-length number that she only wears to pool parties.
Despite all of this, when I first see Alex, I'm glad that she made me dress up.
He looks like a prince waiting for me at the bottom of the winding staircase. His hair is slicked back with just enough product to give it that extra shine without looking goopy and gross.
With the sunlight streaming in through the enormous floor-to-ceiling windows in the foyer, Alex’s eyes sparkle and his skin gets a beautiful beige coloring to it.
This is what photographers call the golden hour of the day and the one that Mom has hired to document the evening snaps a million photos of me walking down the stairs toward my beloved.
There's another photographer positioned across from Alex to capture his reaction. I also spot a cameraman out of the corner of my eye right before Alex takes my hand and pulls me in close for a kiss.
I want to pull away, but the sound in the whole room dies down as everyone holds their breath watching us. Alex’s lips feel soft and delicate on mine. Almost as if they are still begging for forgiveness.
Mine on the other hand are pursed and tense. I want to pull away and smack him across the face, but with everyone watching, I can't.
“Emma,” Alex says, wrapping his arm tightly around my waist. “I'd like you to meet my Uncle Gil and Aunt Elaine.”
The introductions to the family members begins. As soon as we make a little bit of small talk with one group of relatives, he quickly rushes me away to meet another and another. After I am introduced to every one of his parents’ siblings, all of whom have decided to travel across the country to attend this engagement party, then we move on to his parents’ friends.
My stomach rumbles and I use that as an excuse to take a break. There are servers circulating with hors d'oeuvres, but there's also a large hors d'oeuvre table at the far end of the sitting room.
The walls of my parents’ home are linen white and the windows all overlook the deep blue ocean on the horizon. It's a beautiful day, without a cloud in the sky.
It takes all of my strength to not rush out of the French doors leading to the sparkling pool, run past the guest house, and throw myself over the cliff.
“Thank you for being here,” Alex says, reaching for my waist.
I take two steps away from him and load my plate with some carbohydrates.
“I'm not here for you,” I say blankly. “My mom refused to call off the party.”
“I know. I asked her not to.”
I stare at him.
Of course, he did and, of course, she went along with it.
“Don't be mad at her,” Alex pleads. “I'm the asshole. It's just that my parents and all of our family and friends flew in and I didn't want to make everything that happened public until we were sure what was going to happen.”
I start to laugh.
“What's so funny?”
“You really have a way with words. Everything that happened? I love how that statement assigns no fault. The only reason this wedding is off is because of you. I didn't do anything wrong.”
“I know,” he says, casting down his eyes. “That's not what I meant. I just didn't want to…”
“What?” I press him.
“I am embarrassed, okay? I didn't want to tell my parents what I did. I didn't want all of my family and friends to know. I want to make things right with you. I want you back.”