5
Emma
When Mom answers the phone, I can feel the smile on her face and practically taste the excitement. All the preparations are almost done and her favorite part, the part where she gets dressed and glammed up, is about to begin.
“Mom, I have some bad news,” I start. “We need to cancel the party.”
“Absolutely not,” she says without missing a beat.
“You don't even know what happened.”
“I would like to know, but I also want you to know that I'm not canceling this party.”
This takes me by surprise.
I thought she would argue with me, but I didn't realize that she would be this categorical about it.
I take a deep breath. I didn't want to come out and tell her the cold, ugly truth, but now I feel like I don't have a choice.
“I caught Alex with another woman,” I say slowly, pausing after each word. “Today. I walked in on them.”
My phone buzzes and when I look at the screen, I see that she's trying to call me over FaceTime. I don't want to see her, but I accept the call anyway.
“Does he want to be with her?” Mom asks, looking straight into my eyes.
She's sitting in a chair in her large all white bathroom and there is a woman working on styling her hair.
“He says that he's sorry. He still wants to marry me, but of course I can't.”
“Emma—” Mom begins.
I interrupt her and say, “He has been seeing her since before he met me. He's been cheating on me the whole time we have been together.”
I wasn't going to tell her this. Not any of it.
It's embarrassing.
Plus, Mom and I don't have that close of a relationship.
But what Alex did hurt me so much to my core that she has to understand that there's no way I'm going to go through with tonight.
“Emma, I'm really sorry, but I have to tell you something.”
I shake my head no. I don’t want to hear any of it.
“Listen to me,” Mom says, bringing her phone close to her face.
She waves the hairdresser off and then says, “Men get funny about marriage. Alex has never been married before. He probably feels like his whole life is coming to an end. That's how your father felt. He cheated on me, too, before we got married. I was upset, betrayed, angry. I was everything that you are feeling right now. And you know what? I married him and I forgave him. He never cheated on me again.”
I take a deep breath and exhale slowly.
I never knew that my father did that to my mother and I never knew that she forgave him for it.
Maybe he cheated on her afterward and she just doesn't know about it.
Maybe he didn’t.
Either way, it's not good enough. She should know that there are people out there that won’t treat her like this.
“Are you seriously telling me that I should forgive him?” I ask.
“Yes, of course.”
I hate this. I hate realizing that I am profoundly disappointed in the people that I thought my parents were.
“Is it because you planned this big party and you don't want to cancel it or is it because you think that it's okay for a man to treat me like this?” I challenge her.
“No, to both of those questions. It's wrong, what he did, and of course I'm not trying to get you to make up with him just because of tonight's party. But what I want you to know is that relationships are complicated. People aren't perfect. Alex is a wonderful guy who made a mistake.”
“Why are you on his side?” I ask. “What's so special about him? Why don't you want something better for me than a man who treats me like dirt?”
“That's not what I'm saying. You’re putting words in my mouth, Emma, and you know it.”
“I'm not going to marry Alex and we’re not having this party.”
“This party is costing your father and me $30,000,” she says, taking a deep breath and lowering her voice to a barely audible whisper. “Lindsey and I have spent a lot of time planning every last detail and the guests are flying in from all over the US. If you don't want to marry Alex, that's your decision. But you will be there tonight and you will be polite and friendly. We are having this goddamn party.”
My mouth drops open.
“So you want me to show up and just pretend that everything is fine?”
“No, not necessarily,” Mom says with a smile at the corner of her lips. “If you don't want to pretend that everything is fine, then you are more than welcome to tell everyone how you've been humiliated by your fiancé and even go into all of the details about exactly what he did to you. I don't care what you do. But I am having this event for all of those people who have RSVP’d. I'm not canceling it. You will be there and you will be on your best behavior.”
It has been a long time since my mom has talked to me like this. The last time was probably during my college graduation party. It was another party that I had no interest in having or attending, but one that she deemed absolutely necessary.
For some reason, I thought that I was grown up enough so that she didn’t scare me anymore. But looking at her face on the screen, I realize that maybe certain things never go away. Her words hurt me almost as deeply as Alex’s actions and yet, I still find myself wanting her support.
When the workday is finally over, I gather my things and walk over to the elevators. I try to sneak past Corrin’s office, but she catches me and calls me inside.
“I expect to have an update on D. B. Carter on my desk on Monday.”
“This Monday?” I ask.
“Yes, of course, this Monday. I've been assigned the story and I want regular progress reports.”
I stare at her, unsure as to what to say.
“I don't know what I can have for you by Monday,” I finally stutter. “He's a total recluse. I don't even know if he's a he. There's very little information about him on the Internet.”
“People were able to report the news without the Internet back in the day. You are aware of that fact, right?”
I hate the attitude and the tone of her voice when she talks to me. It's like she wants to make me feel worse than I already do.
“What makes you think that I'll be able to find him or even if I do, that he'll talk to me?” I ask. “He never talks to anybody.”
“You know what, Emma,” Corrin says, tapping her finger on her desk while looking away from me. “You are much more capable than you give yourself credit for. You care about this job very much, so I expect you to do it.”
I don’t know how she does it, but for some reason Corrin is capable of saying the most complimentary things in the most ruthless and off-putting way. Her words are drenched in sarcasm and I know that she doesn’t mean a single thing that she has just said to me.
“Okay,” I say, “I'll get you something by Monday.”
“Great, thanks,” she says with a fake smile. “Oh, by the way,” she adds as I start to walk away from her, “congratulations on your engagement.”
6