Nat took a deep breath and stood. ‘You put me down at every opportunity, but I’m not listening to it on my birthday.’ She turned to her father and stepmother. ‘Thanks for lunch and the cake. I’m meeting Pip for drinks, so I need to get going.’ She didn’t bother to say farewell to Hannah, whose mouth was hanging open in disbelief, and she hadn’t spoken to her since.
One thing she knew for sure, if her mother was still alive she’d be Nat’s biggest cheerleader. She wouldn’t be suggesting life coaches or anything else as ridiculous. She’d understand why Nat got herself into these situations and she’d support her decisions and actions. She always had.
Nat swallowed, doing her best to blink back tears as she put the lid back on the mascara and slipped it into her make-up bag. Eighteen years later and she was still wracked with guilt when she allowed herself to think back to that day. For most of the year she did her best not to. She thought of her mother but didn’t allow herself to dwell on the day she died. If she did, she’d be a basket case. But on the anniversary, with dinner looming, it was impossible not to. She’d never been able to forgive herself for letting her mother down, and while she’d never actually said it, Nat was pretty sure Hannah hadn’t forgiven her either. She’d been by their mother’s side when she died and had seen first-hand how upset she was by not being able to say goodbye to Nat. If only she’d put her mother first that day and spent her birthday with her, or at least been contactable. They would have had the chance to say their goodbyes and Hannah would have no reason to resent her.
Chapter Two
Nat glanced at her phone before turning the key in the ignition and pulling out into the street. Still no contact from the owner of the house in East Melbourne she’d looked at that morning. He’d promised to check her references and get back to her by the end of the day. Not that she was really holding out hope. Her references were hardly glowing with her housemates evicting her and her employment being unexpectedly terminated. A sick feeling had planted itself in the pit of her stomach ever since.
Her thoughts drifted to the previous day, to Todd’s smirking face when Lydia, head of human resources, entered the open-plan office area carrying an empty archive box. He’d never liked Nat, making it difficult for her to fit in with the staff of the not-for-profit. Everyone knew what that box represented: instant dismissal – pack your stuff and go. Nat’s heart had caught in her throat as Lydia inched closer to her desk with every footstep. Minutes later she’d found herself sitting in Lydia’s office, the archive box with her belongings on her lap.
‘I’m sorry,’ Lydia said, ‘but the company is unable to overlook what happened last week with Frank Barton. No warning is required in the circumstances. Your actions breach company policy and termination is the consequence.’
Nat gripped the archive box, doing her best to remain calm. It was ridiculous that this is how it ended up when she was only trying to help people. ‘What would you have done, Lydia? There were no vacancies in any of the support houses for him, and all emergency accommodation was full. It was three degrees outside.’ Her actions had been in the best interest of their client. Surely she could understand that?
‘We don’t take clients home with us. That’s drilled into every employee of Benedict’s. No matter what the circumstances. It’s unacceptable and potentially dangerous.’
‘It was only for one night.’
‘Not the point.’ She raised an eyebrow. ‘And not the only breach of company policy.’
‘What do you mean?’
Lydia sighed. ‘You’ve crossed the line before, Nat. Given clients money, taken them out for meals and driven them to appointments after hours and on weekends.’
Now, Nat shook her head as she pulled to a stop at a red light. How could putting others first be a bad thing? They worked for a not-for-profit, for God’s sake. They were supposed to be helping people, that’s why they were there. But then her housemates had reacted similarly. They’d been disgusted when she’d brought Frank home with her. Their lack of compassion had floored her. Couldn’t they imagine themselves or someone they cared about in the same situation? Needing a hot meal, a shower and their clothes laundered. Wouldn’t they want to help them? Apparently not. She’d be glad to get out of there, she just wished the timing was better. Finding a new home without a job was going to be difficult.
The traffic started up and Nat continued along Dandenong Road towards her father’s home in East Malvern. Her stomach grumbled, reminding her that she’d hardly eaten. After looking at the house that morning she’d spent a number of hours at Shared, the community garden and soup kitchen she volunteered at. Digging had been cathartic, and when she’d finished preparing the trench for the leeks to be planted, she’d at least felt a sense of achievement. That feeling had been boosted by Robyn, the centre manager, when she’d flung an arm around Nat’s shoulder and squeezed it. ‘The number of hours you dedicate to Shared each month is simply incredible. It’s people like you that make a difference in this world. Don’t you ever forget that.’
A lump lodged in Nat’s throat as she thought about those words. The difference she was making was about to be reduced significantly. Without an income she’d have to immediately cancel her charitable contributions. She sighed, feeling very much alone. She’d thought about ringing her best friend, but Pip would be at work and she was so caught up in her wedding planning that having to listen to Nat’s problems, again, was probably the last thing she needed.
A weight settled on her shoulders as she turned off the main road and into the quiet tree-lined streets of East Malvern. Dealing with these issues alone was hard enough, but now she had to face her family and admit that she’d failed once again. Hannah would no doubt lecture her on the way she should have done things. She really wasn’t sure that she had the capacity to deal with any of this tonight.
Chapter Three
Hannah’s grip tightened on the steering wheel as her phone rang and she pulled off the main road and into the side street that led to her father’s East Malvern home. Zane Fox’s name briefly flashed up on the car’s dashboard display before she had the chance to cancel the call. Her heart raced as she glanced in the rear-view mirror. Had Amy seen his name? Her daughter’s eyes met hers before returning to the book she’d been engrossed in when Hannah arrived to collect her from after-school care. Her phone pinged. Another message. For once she wished her car didn’t have Bluetooth and her phone didn’t automatically connect.
‘Aren’t you going to listen to your message?’
Amy’s question sent a shiver down Hannah’s spine. She shook her head and did her best to make her voice sound normal. ‘No, it’ll be work-related. I’ll deal with it later.’
Amy raised an eyebrow. ‘Really? But you hate missing a call. You never cancel them. And you just told me you got a promotion today, it might be about that.’
Hannah shrugged, glad Amy couldn’t hear her heartbeat, which was thumping out of control. ‘Tonight’s not about work or anything else. I just want to keep my thoughts on my mum, your grandma. She’s what we should be focused on.’ Hannah averted her eyes from the mirror when she saw sympathy flood Amy’s face. If it wasn’t bad enough that she’d been lying to Damien for twelve years, now she was lying to her daughter too.