“You don’t scare me anymore,” I said, though my voice wavered. Why was I doing this to myself? Was I so starved for them that I’d willingly accept the worst versions of themselves?
“You always were an idiot,” Godfrey said with a laugh. “Smart people know when to fear, Scar. It’s what keeps them alive.”
Didn’t he know? I didn’t want to just be alive. I wanted to have my old life back.
“Why are you here?” Rogue’s demand interrupted.
My eyes flashed to Godfrey’s, and his part in my being here was at the tip of my tongue, but I couldn’t bring myself to throw him under Rogue’s bus. “I wanted to be here,” I said.
“Why do you keep wanting things that don’t want you back?” Rogue asked.
I closed my eyes, forcing my eyes not to fill with moisture. They got the last of my tears months ago. All that was left of me was anger. So instead of getting sad, I breathed in his minty breath.
His eyes traveled lower, kissing my skin with his angry gaze. Rogue and I had always stood toe-to-toe. We’d always challenged one another, always fought, but it used to be innocent. This was a different level entirely.
“What the fuck are you wearing?” he asked as his eyes grew dark. I felt the familiar fight coming on, and my heart raced at the possibility of his anger. A girl had to take what she could get, I suppose.
“A dress,” I snapped back.
I breathed in deeply, brushing my pebbled peaks against his chest. They were still cold from the beer Luis poured down my shirt.
“You think I want you here? What part of stay away don’t you fucking understand?” Rogue asked.
I could feel the anger rolling off of him, see the rage in his eyes. I could feel the way his hands were shaking. We were one white-hot moment away from him wrapping his fingers around my neck and squeezing.
And I liked it.
“I came here to let you know that I’m leaving. You probably don’t care, but I’m done wondering what I did wrong. I’m leaving Monday, and I’m never looking back.”
My voice was calm, despite the adrenaline still coursing through my veins. And the worst part of all of it? I watched for a sliver of emotion, any hint that Rogue cared that I was leaving. I was still clinging to the idea that there was still some part of him that cared about me.
But there was nothing. No expression on his face. No reaction to the idea of me being gone for good. At first I was disappointed, but then I realized that he was too calm, too prepared.
Rogue Motherfucking Kelly already knew I was leaving. Figures. He made it his business to know everything in this town. Oh well, it didn’t change anything. This was it. This was my goodbye. “Is that all?”
I squeezed my eyes shut. “Yeah. That’s all, asshole. Just wanted to tell you to choke on the stick you’ve got shoved up your ass. I don’t know why you hate me. I don’t know why you woke up one day and decided to be cruel to me, but it ends now. You have no power over me anymore. You’re nothing. No one.” My speech was dulled by my rapid breathing at having Rogue so close. I pressed my thighs together to ease some of the thudding tension swirling within me.
“Well, Scar,” Rogue finally said, smirking at my little speech like it amused him. “It’s cute how you think you can escape this.”
I narrowed my eyes.
“She almost looks pretty,” Luis interrupted while stepping forward. I glanced a look over Rogue’s shoulder and stared at him and Bonham, avoiding Godfrey’s bored gaze. I detected a hint of doubt in Bonham’s eyes, but the look was gone the moment he caught me staring at him. Luis moved beside Rogue. “Think we should give her the goodbye that everyone’s waiting for?”
Rogue snapped his eyes to Luis, his perfect face twisting into a sinister smile.
“Yeah. I think we should.” Rogue pushed me backwards until my back was slammed against his bedroom wall. He was still gripping my dress as he shoved his knee between my legs. “You think you’re leaving, Scar? You think coming here to say goodbye would make me start caring again?” He trailed his nose along my neck, smiling against my sticky skin.
“No,” I choked out.
“Good. Because I don’t.”
Just like I’d done to Stephanie, Rogue reached back and fisted my hair in his hand, making me wince at the pain. Forcing my head back, he loomed above me, making me totally at his mercy. “You thought you could just come here, dressed like a slut, and guilt us into feeling bad for you?”
I didn’t answer, but I refused to drop my eyes, either. I met his cold gaze head-on, because as much as they hated me, I knew them. I knew what they liked, what they demanded. I also knew I looked good in this dress. Rogue wanted submission. But I wasn’t going to give him that this time.
“You’re nothing to us,” he taunted. “You’re no one.”
I felt the words as they punctured my heart, and it started bleeding into my gut. My stomach roiled with rejection and misery.
“We don’t want you anymore.” It was something they’d said before, but hearing it again, like this, was killing me. Maybe now I could finally let go. All at once, he stepped away, his leg gone from between my thighs and my scalp throbbing with the absence of his grip. “Strip.”
His word hit me like a brick to the chest. “What?”
“You heard me, Livingston. I said, strip.”
“Fuck you, Rogue.”
“I don’t stick my dick in trash,” he smirked cruelly. “You showed up here in that, wanting attention? Well, you got it. Now strip, or I’ll let Luis cut the dress off you.”
My heart slammed against my chest over and over again. I shouldn't have come here. Why the hell did I think I could face them—face him?
He’s right. I did expect something to change once they knew I was leaving. That stupid, naïve part of me hadn’t stopped hoping that this was all a misunderstanding.
“I’m leaving,” I say, darting toward the door, but Godfrey was already there, leaning against it with that stupid fucking lazily amused look on his face.
Luis tsked at me and took a step forward. When I saw the glint of metal in his hand, my blood turned cold. “Uh uh, Scar. You came to play. So, play.”
“Do it.”
I didn’t get the chance to register Rogue’s words before Luis stepped into me and traced the blunt edge of his blade against my chest before yanking the fabric away from my skin. Then, in one vicious slash, my skin-tight dress was cut from my body. I tried to cross my arms over my chest, but I was too slow. Hands were already wrenching my arms behind me.
My entire body shook as my insides turned into a cocktail of shame and shock.
Rogue kept his grip on my arms no matter how hard I struggled, and the other three didn’t even attempt to hide the way they took me in. Wide hips, full breasts, a toned stomach, legs, and arms. The way they looked at me made me feel like the most repulsive person on the planet.
“Let’s get something more fitting for her to wear,” Rogue’s voice said from behind me. Godfrey smirked and walked out, slamming the door behind him.
Luis taunted me with his knife, the tip of the blade running against my sensitive skin, painting red scratches over me. He dragged it from my neck, slowly down to between my breasts, over my belly button, all the way to the edge of my black laced panties.