My mouth was dry, and even though I tried to calm my erratic breathing, I couldn’t. If Luis wanted to, he could pierce me right now, slice me up into a thousand pieces, and nobody would stop him. They only reason he wouldn’t, was because they relished in the emotional form of torture more than they did the physical.
“She’s got matching black bra and underwear, Rogue. Girls only do that when they’re asking to get fucked.”
Rogue’s grip on my arms tightened against my back, and I swallowed back a whimper. Part of me couldn’t believe I was here, in this situation. But as sick as it was, this was the most attention I’d gotten from them in weeks, and even though I regretted going there, I knew I would have regretted it more if I’d left without seeing them one last time.
“Why are you doing this?” I asked, my voice shaking.
I felt Rogue’s breath against my neck. “Because everyone needs to know.”
“Needs to know what?”
“That you’re nothing to us.”
Just then, the bedroom door opened, and Godfrey slipped back inside, but when I saw what he was holding, my eyes widened in horror and I started to struggle again. “No!”
All four guys chuckled. Luis passed his knife over, and Godfrey made short work of cutting three holes into the black plastic in his hand. Then, unable to stop it, the trash bag was shoved over my head, my arms popped through the makeshift sleeves.
Sticky with beer and dressed in a trash bag that barely covered my ass, Rogue circled around me assessingly, while the other three watched with intense eyes.
“There, that’s more fitting for the ex-queen of the Heirs,” he said, coming to stand in front of me. The tears that I’d tried so hard to fight started to pool in my eyes. With a nod from Rogue, Bonham opened the bedroom door and stepped aside.
Rogue looked at me and waved a dismissive hand. “Now do us all a favor and take yourself out to the curb.” Bonham handed me my clutch that had fallen on the floor before shoving me forward, away from Rogue.
I turned and ran.
Chapter Eight
The crowd of people waiting downstairs didn’t surprise me. They gathered in the foyer, sipping on their spiked punch while waiting for me to descend the stairs. I kept my chin held high as I approached them, another trick I once learned from Bonham Brodie. If I closed my eyes, I could still hear him whispering those confidence-boosting words as he climbed out of my bedroom window when we were kids. “Keep your chin up, Scar. No matter what, don’t let them see your lows.”
So, I took his advice and ripped the trash bag from my body. I first felt a cool breeze lick at my skin, making me shiver, but I ignored the discomfort of having my curves on display. I could almost hear the insults my mama had shoved down my throat all these years.
“Are you really going to eat all that?”
“You need to go for a run.”
“Here, I got my doctor to prescribe me some diet pills. I want you to take them.”
I descended the stairs in my matching black bra and underwear with quick steps and cruel eyes, daring anyone to fuck with me. I felt completely naked. Stripped bare for the whole school to see me as the trash they thought I was.
Instead of the jeers I knew were coming, some of the guys cheered and whistled. “Bye, Trash Whore,” a girl said before slapping her boyfriend for staring.
I kept moving and headed for the back door of the house, planning to wait in the garden shed that was at the edge of the Kelly property until my driver could get here. A guy slapped my ass as I fled, but I only let the sharp sting linger for a moment. Then I whipped back and grabbed his hand before he could fully retract it, kneeing him in the balls before shoving at his chest. He slumped to the ground with a painful and surprised grunt.
“Guess she only lets the Heirs pass her around,” another boy slurred as the crowd laughed. I considered kneeing him in the balls too, and when I moved toward him, the coward flinched and covered his junk. I snorted and kept on walking.
Once outside, I ran on the wet glass, dodging discarded bottles and couples as I made my way through the expansive gardens where Luis and I used to wrestle and play hide and seek. The fall air was crisp, and I huddled my arms around my stomach as I moved, distancing myself from the loud music and party.
When the garden shed came into view, I sighed in relief. It wasn’t a special building, not by any stretch of the imagination. But it held sweet memories, and right then, I needed a place that housed a past that was better than my present.
Once inside, I pulled my phone from my clutch. With shaky fingers, I texted my driver to pick me up. It would be forty-five minutes before he could get to me, so I took a moment to look at the place where I’d gotten my first kiss, and the memory flooded back.
“What if I’m not good at it?” I asked shyly. We were hiding from Godfrey in the garden shed, laughing to ourselves as he called out for us.
“You’ll be perfect at it. You should get the first out of the way. I’m happy to help you with it,” Rogue said with a casual shrug, but I could see the bead of sweat on his upper lip and the way his body was rigid, despite the calm tone. “Come here, Scar.”
I shuffled closer to him and placed my trembling hands on his chest. “Just one kiss. I don’t want to be the only girl in eighth grade that’s never kissed nobody.”
Rogue cupped my cheek, leaning forward to blow his breath down my neck. It smelled like the expensive whiskey we’d stolen from his daddy’s stash. His daddy who was never home to notice, anyway. “One kiss,” he promised, before pressing his lips to mine.
Dismissing the memory, I leaned my back against the wall of the wood shed and slid down. I’d promised myself that they’d gotten the last of my tears, but new disappointments seemed to want to spill down my cheeks. I swiped at the harsh moisture collecting in my eyes and balled my fists.
Rogue was always in charge, always commanding me to take a chance and do the things that scared me. None of them would ever admit it, but he ran them all. They followed him simply because his mere presence demanded submission.
They’d been right when they said I was hoping that something would be different tonight. I’d hoped that Rogue would see me all dolled up, that he would realize that I was leaving, and that something would change. At the very least, I’d hoped that I’d get a break from the hatred in their eyes, and instead see lust. But that hatred had just mixed with cruel desire. It was apparent in the way Rogue had held me against my will. In the way that Luis had scraped my skin with his blade. It was obvious in the way that Bonham wouldn’t quite meet my gaze, and the way that Godfrey opened that door for me to go meet my humiliation.
Their hungry, dilated eyes may have betrayed some desire for my body, but they still wanted to crush my soul.
I placed my shaking palms on the wooden floor, trying to ground myself. For a moment, I closed my eyes, trying to stay in the memory of being thirteen again, and having Rogue’s mouth against mine.
He’d been so sweet with me. So slow and patient. And when his tongue had dipped into my mouth, everything had changed for me. It was no longer about a rite of passage—of completing an important step with someone I trusted. When Rogue had cupped my face and kissed me like he cared about me, something opened up inside of me.