“I don’t care about what they say, you are beautiful anyway.”
“Give me a break.”
I could tell by his face that he wanted to say more, but he accompanied me without another word all the way. I knew what he was going to tell me. It was a bet between Emma and Karl, and that he’d done it to get my attention and make me think he had a crush on me. Gustav could be more creative than me and was jealous of the most popular boy at school who had just humiliated me in front of everybody. If I was as attractive as he said I would be on the covers of magazines. I was as important to Karl as an umbrella on a sunny day. After this episode, my platonic love became a real rage. This type of people only care about themselves. The only boy that really cared about me was Gustav, but he was never going to be more than a friend, even if he dreamt about it.
“Is your birthday dinner still happening?”
“I think so.”
“See you later then, Lolis.”
It still wasn’t even one o’clock. We said goodbye at the corner of the block, and I went home where I could stay by myself. My mom would come home with Rodrigo to make the birthday dinner soon. What a horrible morning!
I went upstairs directly to my room. Koda followed me. The oh-so-comfy bed waited for me, ready to dive into. That is exactly what I did, for sure it was the best place for my day. I shouldn’t have left it this morning.
As soon as I touched my head on the pillow, thoughts started to pop up in my head. Not even the accident or the school humiliation made me forget my parents’ reaction at dinner, those scenes kept me in doubt of what was happening around me. So, I heard a whisper in my head, look for clues in their room. It was the ideal moment. I got up at once, looked from one side to the other in the hallway and walked as carefully as a thief to the next door. I had to be fast. I was looking for something that could explain that bizarre moment. I remembered I was still wearing my uniform.
I started by opening the wardrobe door and then went to the chest drawers. I found an old shoebox with no leads, just many old paid bills inside. When I moved the box out of place, there was a pile of papers hidden on the bottom of the drawer with some older pictures that smelled like mold. Auntie Eva and my father must have been my age in those pictures, no big deal there. I looked each one over and ended up finding some documents there, including my father’s grading card from when he was in school. It had a small black and white picture of his face and beside it was written Lars Ohlsson Bloom, age fifteen years, hair color blond, eyes color blue. Wait there, my father had brown eyes, always had. No? That must have been a mistake of the person who wrote this.
I start searching through the hidden pictures and to my surprise the information was correct. His eyes were blue. I never knew eye color could change as we grow up.
My hands started to sweat, if my father caught me looking over his stuff, he would be furious. Even though, I kept searching for more clues in his drawer. As I found more pictures (even if they were black and white), the more I agreed that his eyes were indeed blue, like mine and my grandfather’s. My father was never the type that cared about looks, especially because he didn’t need to, he had been always very handsome. He would never wear contacts to change his color for vanity, no way! Then why did he had now brown eyes, just like our couch color, if they were blue? I went to look around their room to find something that could help me with my questions, but I just got more confused.
While I was looking at his grading card for the fifth time, I heard key noises. My mom was arriving home with Rodrigo, Koda went running to meet them. She was early. I got up with a jump, putting together the pictures and throwing them back into the drawer. I got out of their room fast, before she came upstairs. When she stepped on the top of the stairs, my bedroom door finally closed. She stopped, paying attention.
“Lola, are you there?”
“Yes, mom. I’m in my room, come in,” I answered in a lazy voice, like I had been hours in bed, trying to fake my fast breath with a pillow.
She came to the door and asked why I was back at home so early. I told her I needed to rest my legs and she believed me. Luckily, she turned around and went to the kitchen. If she got a little bit closer, she would have noticed I was still wearing my shoes. I was shivering like when it is cold from the adrenaline, fear, and doubts. I had no idea what all this mess meant.
It wasn’t worth trying again with my parents, only one person could explain to me once and for all what was happening. Auntie Eva. While my mom made Rodrigo’s food, I picked up the phone in the hall, hidden.
“Kaleidoscope Store, Good afternoon!”
“Auntie Eva, this is Lola. I need to talk to you right now, can I come to the store and meet you?”
“Happy Birthday, dearest! Of course, are you ok? Do you want to go back to the hospital? I can pick you up!”
“Hum…hospital, what? Everything is fine, I’ll explain when I get there. I’m leaving right now.”
When I hung up the phone and went in the direction of the door, my mom held me back. I wouldn’t be able to go before washing the dirty dishes in the sink.
“If you are already up, little lady, then you are feeling better, you can come and help me around,” she said.
So, I got it done as she told me, including getting a bite of the last cinnamon roll left on the table, even if my stomach was already full of anxiety. I told her I needed to deal with some issues outside and ran to the store, before my mom could ask more questions or find more things for me to do. I looked up both sides of the street a few times before crossing, just for caution.
When I arrived at Kaleidoscope, my aunt was finishing a sale with Mr. Anderson, who couldn’t decide on which cup set he liked best, one from 150 years ago and one that was 200 years old. I felt like pushing him out of the door already, but I stood still, waiting. My head was already boiling when he left, going closer to the counter.
“Lola! Mr. Anderson noticed you wanted him to leave, that’s impolite! This set has been in the store for a long time, you’re lucky he bought it.”
“Auntie, there is something really weird happening. Do you remember that dinner at our house when Mrs. Lena?” Auntie Eva interrupted me.
“What? Speak slowly and stop biting your nails, that’s annoying me,” she said, giving me the cold shoulder and starting to fix a shelf that held orange incense.
“Oh Auntie, please! Tell me you didn’t notice? Listen to me, today I saw a picture of my father when he was a teenager, something he never had shown me! And in the picture, he had B-L-U-E eyes, just like me!”
Aha, now I had her full attention on me. Auntie Eva left her incense aside, turned slowly and faced me, squeezing her eyes.
“Don’t look at me like this! Auntie, please, explain me all of this!” And I got back on biting my nails. She sighed and dropped her shoulders.
“My dearest. Calm down. I can’t leave the store alone right now. Tonight, at your birthday dinner, we can talk about this, I promise I will explain it to you. Don’t talk about this with anyone, ok?”
Wait until tonight? That wasn’t fair, I wanted to know what was happening right then, but another customer did me a favor and came in the store, ending all my chances. I got out feeling that cinnamon roll rolling in my stomach. I think it is easier to wait for Christmas time than it was for me to wait till that dinner time. I really hate to wait!