I laugh as Tammy flicks water at me. “Maybe a little.”
She cackles and leans into my side. “Have you two done the deed yet?”
I roll my eyes at her term but smile because I love my friend. “Who says that? And no. I told you, I don’t want anything to ruin his scholarship, and a teen pregnancy would definitely do that.”
She shrugs. “Well, can’t get pregnant from a blowjob.”
I laugh again and blush profusely. That we have done, a few times. He doesn’t push me though. Never. I always feels safe with Lawson. And I love seeing him lost in pleasure. It’s quickly becoming one of my favorite things.
“Shhh . . .”
She laughs. “What?” she whispers playfully. “Does he not know that you two have done that?”
I splash her this time. “He doesn’t know I’ve told you we’ve done that.” Although I’m pretty sure he could guess. He knows I pretty much tell Tammy everything. “I need to stop telling you things.”
“Nope. This is what best friends are for.”
I don’t get a chance for rebuttal before Tanner pulls her into and under the water. I laugh and jump up before Law can grab me. “Get in here, Rae.”
“No way!” I giggle. He grabs the edge, his muscles flex as he prepares to lunge out of the pool. “Wait!”
He freezes. “I have to pee. I’ll be right back and then you can manhandle me, I swear.”
He eyes me suspiciously but jokingly. “Hurry up.” He splashes me, and I squeal, running into the house, wrapping a towel around my bikini, and heading into the bathroom.
When I get out, I’m carrying my towel and almost make it to the patio door before two hands grip my wrists, and I’m slammed against the wall. “What the fuck is going on in my backyard?”
Shit. Colin was supposed to be at the school late tonight. My mom is out of town for a few days on business. My heart is beating rapidly as he closes in on me, his chest brushing against mine. “Just some friends hanging out.”
“Bullshit. The company you keep is very disappointing, Raelynn. Your mom may think they’re harmless, but I know better.”
“My mom likes Tammy.” And she does. The few times Tammy has come over with my mom here, they’ve gotten along just fine.
“Your mom isn’t all that bright.”
“I’ll be sure to tell her that,” I sneer.
His hands grip my wrists tighter. “I won’t have some teenage orgy in my backyard. Tell them to leave.”
Fear washes over me, thinking about him in this mood with me being forced to be alone with him. I can smell alcohol on his breath. That’s becoming more and more prevalent over the months too.
“We’re just swimming. We aren’t doing anything wrong.” He releases one wrist but keeps the other one trapped as his hand slides over my bare side and then over my stomach. I’m frozen in fear and disgust. “Don’t.”
His laugh is cruel as his hand covers my breast in the bikini top. “I see what you’re doing, Raelynn. I know girls like you. Always tempting.”
“I didn’t do anything.” I struggle to get my arm free, but he squeezes my wrist tightly.
“You wear these itty bitty bikinis and hooker dresses, just begging for my attention.” He leans in, his hot breath against my ear as he whispers, “Trying to seduce me.”
“You’re disgusting. I want nothing to do with you. I’m dating Lawson.”
He laughs again, cold and cruel and full of bitterness. “Oh, please. He’s a boy. No boy can please a little tramp like you.” His hand moves up to my neck. “You need a man.”
“He’s twice the man you’ll ever be, and you know it.”
He puts pressure on my throat, not enough to leave a mark, but enough to frighten me. “He’s nothing. A fucking nobody. You’d be a great meal ticket for him.”
“Like my mother was for you?”
He squeezes my wrist and my throat tighter, leaning in, spitting venom, “Your mother begs me to fuck her, you know. All over this house. She spreads her legs and begs for my dick.” I feel bile rise in my throat, not wanting to hear any of these words, not wanting him to touch me. “She loves me. And if I ask her to make you stop seeing him, you know she will. All I have to do is make her scream in ecstasy.”
“You mean repulsion, right?”
He jerks my arm, pulling my body even closer to him. “I own you, Raelynn. And I can do anything I want with you.”
I whimper, and damn it, I despise myself for it. I can’t let him see my weakness.
Finally, he releases me and grabs a whiskey bottle off the counter, heading toward the stairs and his bedroom. I take a shaky breath and cover my throat with my hand.
“Rae?” I turn to look when the door slides open and Lawson walks in, concern dripping from his dark features. He stands in front of me.
“Hey.”
“Are you okay?” He knows I’m not. It’s obvious I’m not. I force myself to smile and then stand on my tiptoes to wrap my arms around his neck. He’s definitely a lot taller than me now.
“I’m fine.”
He doesn’t believe me. “Rae . . .”
I kiss his soft lips and let myself relax into his larger body. “I’m okay, Law. I promise.”
“If you weren’t, would you tell me?”
I want to say yes, but we both know it would be a lie. So, I just let him wrap his big arms around me and hold me.
I can get through this. Only a little more time until I’m out of school and out of this house.
* * *
Rae threads her fingers through my hair as I lay my head in her lap on the couch in my living room. I have no idea why she likes to play with my hair so damn much, but she does, and there’s no way I’m going to stop her.
I love her touch.
I’m afraid for her though. Last week, when I found her inside her house while we were swimming at her place, she was visibly shaken, but she wouldn’t talk to me about it.
We’ve known each other for two years. We spend every free second together. I know Rae. I know when she’s not okay.
And she’s not okay.
Her other hand tangles with mine as our hands rest on my stomach. “Kind of a lame birthday, huh?”
I’ve never celebrated birthdays. Not really. My mom was either too drunk or too poor to really do much for us. Although Nash usually gets me something. This year it was new brushes to paint with. But laying here with Rae’s fingers threaded through my own and through the strands of my hair, I’d say it’s the best birthday I’ve ever had. “I wouldn’t say that.”
She smiles down at me as I look up at her, reaching behind her neck to pull her down with a kiss that ends too soon when Nash bursts through the front door, making us both jump.
He sits in the chair next to the couch, ignoring my glare. “Your stepdad know you’re here?”
Rae slips her hands out of mine, and I feel her stiffen. “No.”
“Right.” Nash’s jaw ticks, and I hate how rude he is to Rae. He keeps her at a distance, which he’s never done to Tammy, Tanner, or any of my other friends that have been coming around for years.