I finally make my way over to her just as she’s ordering, and when they tell her the total she hands them a black card. The girl behind the counter tells her what I already know. Cash only.
Raelynn blanches. “Oh. I, ummm . . .”
I smile and hand the girl a ten from my pocket before collecting the change. Raelynn looks horrified as we gather our drinks and the two slices of pizza. “Thank you. I’ll pay you back.”
“I’m not worried about it. It’s okay.” Although I probably should be, I don’t like the uncomfortable look on her face.
“I never carry cash.”
“Yeah, this place is a little behind the times, but I kind of like it.”
We take a seat at one of the smaller tables near the booth where most of my friends are sitting. I don’t think she’s ready to join them, and I can feel Tammy’s heated glare on me from here. “I like it too.”
“Yeah?” I take a sip of my soda. “Good.”
“Your friends hate me,” she says, not playing fake at all.
“They don’t know you.”
“You don’t either.”
I settle in my seat and take a big, totally unpolite bite of pizza, chewing it and then say, “So, tell me about you.”
She looks nervous now as she picks at her pizza. “Not much to tell. I’ll be fifteen in three weeks. I’m a freshman at a tiny little school where most people hate me. My mom . . .” Her eyes darken, and she looks away. “She doesn’t really like me either.”
I didn’t expect that at all. “What? How could your own mom not like you?”
Her eyes are watery, but she doesn’t look at me. “I don’t know. I think it probably started with her own father not liking her.”
She turns back to look at me, wiping at her cheek and picking at her pizza again. “I’m gonna need more.”
She laughs at that, softly and sweetly. “I don’t know the whole story. Only that she was his first born and not male. He was extremely disappointed, and then his wife, who was apparently the love of his life, couldn’t have more children. So, he was stuck with a female heir.”
“That’s messed up.”
She laughs again, and I decide I really like that sound. “Yeah. It is. And then my mom gave him another girl.”
“Wow. That’s some pretty juicy family drama there.” I take another bite and relish in her giggle.
“True. Anyway, my dad left when he found out she was pregnant, and she never tried again. So, it’s just me. I guess resentment trickles down.”
“Wow.”
“You say that a lot.” I laugh, because what do you say to that? “What about your family?”
“Ah, want me to make you feel better with my messed-up family tree?”
She smiles and finally nibbles on her pizza, nodding her head. “I think so. But it would have to be pretty messed up.”
“Well, my mom loves me. At least she tries to. But she doesn’t love me more than booze.” Her smile drops, but I don’t let her interrupt. “She does try. Really. She’s tried to get sober, but with no money, it’s hard. She has to rely on the government programs, and they just don’t work.”
She seems to be thinking that over. “I think addiction is tricky. Not sure the high-priced rehabs do any better.” Her cheeks turn pink as she shrinks into herself. “Not that money doesn’t help. I’m sure it does.”
I stop her. She has no reason to be embarrassed for having money. “Yeah, you’re right. But anyway, she’s tried several times and always goes back to the booze.”
“And your dad?”
“He comes around, off and on. Usually to beg for money we don’t have.”
“I’m sorry.” She seems to mean it even though I’m not sure what she’s apologizing for.
“It’s okay. My brother, Nash, is awesome. You might have seen him earlier.”
“The massive guy who had you in a headlock?”
I laugh. “Hey, I’m massive too,” I say, playfully defensive.
She laughs too. “Oh, you’re right. He must have tricked you to overpower you like that.”
“Yeah. That’s it,” I play along.
She takes a drink of her soda. “But he’s good to you.” It’s not a question, and I’m glad she doesn’t have to question that. She’s intuitive, this one.
“Yeah. He is. He’s good to all of us. He could have gone to college, but instead, he started work right out of high school to pay the bills. Everything is in his name, and he pays the bills directly so my mom can’t drink it away. He does a lot for us.”
“Wow.”
“You say that a lot,” I tease.
She giggles, and it’s pretty. I can’t stop thinking it’s a beautiful sound.
“Can I call you Law?”
“Can I call you Rae?”
She nods, and so do I.
Well, there you have it. We’re officially friends.
* * *
I had fun. Like, a lot of fun. I can’t remember the last time I did. Not even at the private school I attended in Dallas before my mom decided to uproot our lives and marry Colin, moving us to this tiny little town.
For now, we’re living in his small three-bedroom house in the middle of town, but my mother’s having a large home built out in the country that we’ll move into soon enough.
The car drops me off in front of the house, and I walk up to the front door, only to see it be jerked open and for Colin to step outside. He’s furious, grabbing my arm and jarring me. “Where the hell have you been?”
I hate his stupid thick Texas accent. I yank away from him. “I texted my mother that I was going to hang out with friends after school today. She hasn’t even read it so I’m sure she’s not worried.”
“I don’t give a fuck if she’s worried or not. It’s eight o’clock. Who were you out with this late?”
“It’s not that late.”
“Don’t you dare take that tone with me, Raelynn. I’ve worked hard to gain my reputation in this town, and I won’t let my little slut of a stepdaughter ruin it for me.”
I flinch, hating that I let him get to me. It’s not the first time he’s called me that. But after the word being written on my locker today, I’m even more sensitive.
“I’m not a slut.”
“Right.” He waves his hand in my direction. “Are you even wearing a bra?”
I instinctively fold my arms over my chest, feeling dirty at his question. “What? You can’t ask me that.”
“You think those little boys at school aren’t looking at you? Trying to decide the same thing? You look slutty, and they’re going to treat you accordingly.”
The shirt I’m wearing has a built-in bra, and it’s not like my chest is all that impressive, but that’s not the point. My mother married a skeevy perv who never stops mentioning these sorts of things to me. But never around her. Not really.
But he’s always commenting on my clothes and how they show too much skin. How men will get the wrong idea. That maybe I’ll like that. That maybe I want men to use me up.