It was time to take a fucking risk.
“Unfortunately, I made plans with my brother Fitz and I have this unwritten rule never to cancel on my family unless I was dealing with a deadline.”
“I totally understand. No worries. Maybe another time.”
“You could join us. If you like. We’re just going to be grilling some steaks in my backyard.”
“I wouldn’t want to home in on family time. I know your brother’s about to head into training and prep for the new season.”
“You wouldn’t be trespassing on our time together. Trust me. He’d enjoy your company, though not half as much as I would. Please. I want to repay you for all this.”
“That’s totally not necessary.”
“But I want to.” Bobby turned his head, catching Navy’s gaze. “Please. Come join me for dinner tonight?”
“If you insist.”
“I do,” Bobby said.
“Then it’s a date.” Wrong fucking choice of words.
5
Bobby filled the wine decanter with his favorite Pinot Noir, snagged two stemless glasses, and headed toward the patio of his beachfront home.
Navy had made himself comfortable on one of the lounge chairs with his hands clasped behind his head and his feet crossed at the ankles.
“Here you go.” Bobby set the glasses down and poured a hearty fill before joining Navy. “I have to say now that you’ve shared your little piece of heaven, every time I sit out here and see a small plane, I’ll wonder if it’s you.”
“I’ll make sure to wave.”
Bobby laughed.
“Your brother is an interesting character and I have to admit to having enjoyed his company. He’s highly entertaining.”
“I won’t argue that point.”
“May I make a confession?” Navy lifted his wine before taking it to his lips. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. “Actually, two.”
“Be my guest.”
“You’re going to have to call me a Lyft. I’m not safe to drive.”
“I wasn’t planning on letting you get in your car anyway.” Bobby closed his eyes and focused on the sound of the ocean gently lapping at the shore. A few birds made their presence known, and in the distance, he could hear people chatting as they strolled on the beach. Until a few hours ago, this had been his favorite place on earth.
Now he had the sky.
Only, he wasn’t sure it would be the same if it wasn’t with Navy and only inside Destiny. Maybe Navy would take him up in the helicopter sometime.
“You can crash here if you want.” Shit. That wouldn’t be a good idea because no way could Bobby keep his hands and lips to himself.
“I’ve got to be up early to head to the airport, so this really has to be my last glass and I should be heading home by ten, at the very latest.”
“Not a problem. I prefer to get up early myself to get my words in. That way I have the day.” Bobby blinked open his eyes. “You mentioned you had a second confession to make?”
“I’m a little embarrassed by this one, but I wanted you to know.” Navy shifted more onto his right hip, bending his knees slightly. “While talking with Fitz, I looked for any part of him that could have been one of your characters in your books and while I did notice he cracks his knuckles much like your hero in your second novel, I couldn’t find anything.”
“You’re really worried I’m going to use parts of the things you’ve told me about your life in my books, aren’t you?”
“To be totally honest, I was a little and maybe I still am. I mean, where else do writers get their material? I’m sorry.”
Bobby reached out and took his hand, intertwining their fingers. “Don’t apologize to me and you’re not the first one to raise the concern. I’ll be honest, there are more pieces of my family in my book, but you don’t know them like I do, and I have their permission. I would never do that to you, or to anyone. And for the record, I get a lot of my material by watching strangers.” He pointed to the couple walking two dogs. “When I first moved here, those two used to meet up right in front of my house every morning around six thirty. They each had their own puppy. I decided they were having an affair.”
“The couple from When Strangers Meet.”
“You really have read my books.”
Navy gave his hand a little squeeze. “I generally don’t lie.”
Bobby lowered his chin.
“When it comes to my family, I often omit some truths.”
“Enough said.” Bobby got the distinct impression that Navy didn’t get along too well with his siblings and for now, he wouldn’t pry. However, if handholding became something more, that would be a game changer. Bobby would need to know what he was getting into. “Anyway. I get a lot of ideas just from sitting back and watching people I don’t know or from books and even movies and television shows.”
“Wouldn’t that be considered stealing?”
“No. Not unless I copied the entire plot and characters. But usually what happens is something I watch or read sparks an idea. Just a nugget. Something to get the ball rolling. Like this documentary I watched last year which sparked the story for the book I’m working now, but I’m kind of wishing I hadn’t gone as deep as I had because I hate it.”
“I’m sure it’s fantastic.”
“It sucks, but thanks for the vote of confidence.” Bobby hated to admit, even to himself, how utterly terrified he was that not only did this book suck and the publisher would put it through the paper shredder and he’d be forced to give his advance back, but that he’d never even be able to finish the fucking thing. Every day he sat down and put words on the page. He met his goals and he told himself he was doing what he had to do and that at some point he’d find the real story.
“Do you always feel like your book stinks while you’re working on it?”
“At some point I’m sick of the damn thing, but no. I’m an arrogant asshole and generally I think I’m a terrific writer and all my books are fabulous, but I don’t know how this one is going to make the New York Times list.”
“I imagine it’s a lot of pressure after making a bestselling list and then staying on the list for weeks on end.”
“It’s not the pressure so much. I mean I hit the USA Today under my pen name twice; it’s just that I know this book isn’t as good and the press is looking for a reason to dislike the golden boy of gay romance. And then there is the expectation of the fans. I worry more about them. If I disappoint those who put me on that list, well, I’m fucked.”
Navy rubbed his thumb over the back side of Bobby’s hand in a slow circular motion. “I don’t know anything about the writing process, but I love to read. I’d be more than happy to be your sounding board.”
“You might be sorry you offered because I might take you up on that.” Bobby sipped the light, but rich flavored wine while he tried to calm his pulse, and his libido. He wouldn’t ask Navy to spend the night a second time. He didn’t want to seem desperate. Besides, he wasn’t sure anything would happen. Navy isn’t the kind of man Bobby wanted to jump right into bed with. He wanted to take things slow, if there were any chance they could have a romantic entanglement that lasted longer than a few weeks or months.