I'm happy at his admission, but I can tell it comes at a cost. I notice he didn't answer my original question, but I let it slide for now.
"Music to my ears. We'll talk about the rest later, yeah?"
“Can deal with that. Mind if I crash with you? Made no plans, kinda got in the car and started driving.”
“Don’t even need to ask, brother. You know damn well my place is yours for as long as you need. Shop is yours, too. There’s always room for you here.”
“Appreciate it.”
“My client cancelled, and I’ve got some time before my next appointment. Let’s head back to the office and catch up for a bit.”
He nods, following silently behind me.
“I’ll introduce you to the rest of the guys later and get you set up in your own space. Start taking clients whenever you’re ready.”
“Sounds good. Maybe I’ll take care of shit up front for you before you wring someone’s neck over that damn bell.”
He knows me too damn well.
Ushering him into my office, I chuckle and clap him on his back again.
“Welcome home, motherfucker.”
“Good to be here, honestly. Felt some of the weight disappear from my shoulders as soon as I crossed the state line.”
“Ryan and I are both willing to bear that burden with you, but you’ve refused to let us in.”
I take a seat behind my desk while Cannon sprawls out across the small couch in the corner. He rubs his hand across his jaw and sighs.
“I know, man. Needed time to process. Time to grieve. Still do.”
“I feel for you. I know what it’s like to suffer a loss. Hell, I’m still dealing with the aftermath of my mom’s fucked up choices.” It’s obvious he doesn’t really want to talk about what went down the last few months, so I spare him. “Hell, you’ve been dealing with so much, I haven’t even told you the latest.”
I tell him everything I discovered in the box of paperwork and documents from my mom’s storage unit.
I know I shouldn’t speak ill of the dead, but I’m still so goddamn angry at her. The secrets, the lies, taking the cowards way out without owning up to her shit. I’ll always love her, but I’m furious. I think it’s well within my rights, even if it makes me a shitty son. I can’t help how I feel.
“Jesus. That’s a whole lotta fucked up.”
I scoff. “Tell me about it.”
He’s not surprised to hear I hired Jake to find out what he can about the man who fathered me. I’m the type to leave no stone unturned when I’m looking for something, or in this case, someone.
“I can’t even describe how it feels now that I know the truth. There’s this whole other side to me that I don’t know. It’s like this empty space I don’t know how to fill.” I run my fingers through my hair and make a mental note to ask Camille to trim it for me. “Maybe if I can find my real family, I won’t feel so damn incomplete.”
“Get outta here with that bullshit, Adam.” Cannon sits straight up, eyeing me with a glare that could burn. “We’re your real family. Me. Ryan. Hannah. Hell, Ryan’s mom, her husband, and now the...babies.”
His Adam’s apple bobs in his throat and he closes his eyes, taking a second to breathe. When he opens them again, they glisten with unshed tears, but I pretend I don’t notice. He’s not ready to open up about everything and I won’t force him. For now, we’ll focus on my shit and come back to his when the time is right.
“Blood doesn’t make family, Adam. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten that fact. I understand why you want to find your father, but right now, he’s essentially a sperm donor. Finding him isn’t going to make you whole. I think deep down you know that.”
“Gotta try. Because I don’t know what the fuck else to do.”
“I get it. You’ll let me know if there’s anything I can do to help?”
I nod, and let it drop.
Being an orphan from a young age, I thought he’d understand. He was bounced from foster home to foster home. Ryan and I were the only family he had. Still are.
Hell, maybe he’s right. I won’t know unless I find my father.
For now, that’s where I’ll keep my focus.
FIVE
Presley
It’s been awhile since I’ve been to the bar with my sisters.
They’re both always busy with their men and kids.
I don’t begrudge them their happiness, they both went through hell and fought for their happily ever after. But knowing that doesn’t stop the pang of envy from shooting through me whenever I see them and their happy families. It’s not pleasant to always feel like the one who got left behind.
I was supposed to come with Derrick tonight, but he had a wardrobe malfunction to handle or something. I don’t know. Not sure I want to. I’ve learned not to ask questions about certain things. I had Madalyn swing by the apartment to pick me up and Derrick promised to meet me here as soon as he can.
Spending time with my sisters until he gets here is no hardship. I hadn’t realized how much I missed them until now. We used to be inseparable. Oh, how times have changed.
Camille has already fucked with Jaxson, as usual, by ordering the raunchiest named drinks she can think of. It’s hilarious that he gives as good as he gets now. Not sure the game between the two of them will ever end. It’s good fun for anyone who’s lucky enough to be around when it goes down.
I order another Adios Motherfucker, my intention to get completely fucked up tonight. It’s been a favorite since Jaxson served one to Camille as a joke last year, but I don’t order one often.
I look around while I wait for Noah to finish mixing my drink.
Most people have something green in their glass.
Green beer. I’ve never understood the hype. I tasted it one time and swore to never let something so vile touch my taste buds again.
I’m surprised to see they actually decorated this year. It’s a bit much if you ask me, but no one did, so I’ll keep my opinion to myself. There are four-leaf clovers everywhere and a huge rainbow made from balloons. I was speechless when I first walked in and saw that particular monstrosity.
Oh well. Whatever gets their rocks off. People seem to be having a good time and that’s what really matters.
Noah slides my drink across the bar at the same time someone taps me on the shoulder. I cover the top of my glass with my hand and turn to see who’s trying to get my attention.
Jaw meet floor.
It’s official.
Not allowing Derrick to choose my outfit for tonight is by far the best decision I’ve ever made. I may have dodged an actual bullet this time.
Standing in front of me is my best friend in all his glittering glory.
Blinking back my surprise, I raise my glass toward my mouth, wrap my lips around the straw and sip. Continuously.
I keep my mouth busy and my expression neutral until Derrick spins in a full circle, ending it with an enthusiastic shimmy and a bold, brilliant smile.