I laid in my bed, my stuffed moose in my arms, held tight against my chest. My eyes grew wide as I tried to make sure I could see every corner of my room. It felt like the room grew smaller in size the darker it got. I shared my fears with my mother and the next night, when she turned the lights off, it wasn’t so scary. My little world didn’t appear to have collapsed. The walls weren’t closing in on me. The corners stayed where they had started. That night, I rolled over, my stuffed moose held loosely in my arms and saw a small night light had been plugged into the wall.
Water cup in hand, I stood up and closed the blinds of the windows before I walked toward the bathroom to refill my cup with water. I returned to my bed and laid down and pulled the covers up to my chin.
I had just closed my lids when Tux started whimpering. A small smile grew on my lips. I slowly opened my eyes and looked down on the floor next to me. Tux was wagging his tail and looking up at me with big eyes I couldn’t resist. I lifted the comforter and patted the space next to me. He hesitated for a minute before he backed up and jumped onto the chair by the bed. He made the same move and in one more leap, was next to me. He curled up and watched my face as he waited for me to put the comforter back down on top of him. I laughed as I put the blanket back in place. I rolled over and, all of a sudden, I had that feeling in my chest that the room didn’t seem so small.
I opened my eyes and saw a light shining through a crack in the blinds of my window. I wasn’t sure what it was, but I was too tired to find out.
• • •
My eyes shot open. The house was eerily quiet. It was still nighttime. I glanced at the clock on my nightstand.
3:07 am.
I heard a scratching noise across my window. I turned my head once more and gazed at my curtains. Though it sounded like a tree branch, there was no shadow trying to crawl into my bedroom. The light from outside was dim where it came through my window. I found it comforting and closed my eyes, falling back to sleep.
“ARE YOU READY for school tomorrow?” I asked Stassi as I picked up a plain black V-neck from the stack of shirts displayed in the Junior’s section.
Stassi walked slowly across the store, staring intently at her cell. “As ready as I always am,” Stassi mumbled.
She put her phone in her back jean pocket and looked up at me with her blue eyes. A smile lifted her cheeks as I pushed the shirt toward her.
“You know me so well, Mom.”
She reached for the black shirt in my hand and held it up against her chest. It was the same exact shirt she was already wearing underneath her torn overalls.
“I’ll take it.” She nodded her head and laughed as she threw the shirt in our cart.
I laughed along with her. “You already have like a million of these shirts Stassi.”
“I know, but I’m pretty sure I don’t have this brand.”
She reached into the cart for the shirt and looked at the tag. “Nope. Definitely do not have this brand. I need it for my collection.”
I shook my head and smirked as we walked toward the counter to pay.
“You want to go grab some frozen yogurt?” I asked.
We walked toward the car, two bags in hand, side by side.
“Dessert before dinner?” she playfully gasped.
So dramatic, this one.
I rolled my eyes. “It’s the least I could do before forcing you to go to school tomorrow,” I answered theatrically, playing along.
She nodded her head and laughed. “It really is.”
I started putting the bags in the back seat with a huge grin splayed across my face. Stassi skipped up toward the front seat. For just a moment, I saw it. I saw Stassi as a little girl, her blonde hair in pigtails, small ribbons tied at the bottom. I would have dressed her in the same outfit. Black shirt, overalls, black high-top Converse. She hadn’t changed much since she was a little girl, but at the same time, she’d changed drastically. I slammed the back door shut and joined her in the front seat.
• • •
I hadn’t been to a frozen yogurt shop before. The small place was set up in the same happy colors as a creamery with greens, pinks, and purples. Though it put an instant smile on my face, I was overwhelmed by all that appeared to be going on in the little store. Stassi, who had walked in ahead of me, was already picking up little white cups and heading toward the back wall. She pulled on a lever and a bright pink frozen yogurt stream came flowing out of the spout. She placed her lips over the small cup and turned to look for me. When her gaze met mine, she quickly swallowed the yogurt from the cup then smiled. She waved her hand, urging me to join her.
As I walked over toward my beautiful daughter, I almost fell forward. Someone had knocked into my shoulder. I turned around and faced a wrinkled old woman. There was a glimmer in her eye and a sly grin on her lips.
“I’m so sorry, dear,” she said. “I better watch where I’m going.”
Her eyes appeared to have changed into black and she coughed a little as she looked over my shoulder at Stassi.
My heart was pounding in my chest as I stared at the woman. My fingers slowly began twitching as they hung by my sides. I recognized her, but I couldn’t tell from where. Her presence sent a chill down my spine that I couldn’t explain.
Her dark eyes glared into my face. “You have a very beautiful daughter.” The smirk she had before returned and grew wider.
“Excuse me?” I whispered.
“Have a nice day, dear.” The woman turned and walked out the front door.
“Here, Mom, try this one.” Stassi came up from behind me and shoved a sample of caramel colored frozen yogurt in my face.
I turned my attention away from the entrance and took the small cup from her bubblegum pink painted fingers. I simply held the treat in my hand and stared at her, a vacancy in my eyes.
“What is it, Mom?” she asked, concern lacing her voice.
I looked back toward the door, only to see the woman was no longer in sight. A heaviness that had laid on my chest lifted. I sighed and shook my head. Looking back at Stassi, I couldn’t help but smile. I lifted the cup to my mouth and tried the frozen yogurt. My eyes lit up as the taste of coffee danced on my taste buds.
“Good right? I thought you would like that one. Coconut Coffee,” she exclaimed.
Stassi took the small cup from me and threw it in a small silver trash bin on the floor then grabbed two larger bowls off of the counter and handed one to me.
“Fill her up, Mom. Make it your masterpiece.”
Stassi began going around the wall of spouts and filling her tub with a little bit of everything. I looked at all of the flavors and decided to follow her lead. I filled up the tub with everything.
After paying for our treats, we found a shaded table outside. It was September, but it was still sunny and humid outside. We stacked our purses in an empty chair at the table and dug in.
“You looking forward to tomorrow?” I asked before placing a mouthful of the concoction I’d made into my mouth.
Stassi rolled her eyes. “You kinda already asked me that today, Mom.” Though I could tell she was slightly annoyed, she still let a weak smile sit on her lips.
“I know, but I just want to make sure you’re going to be okay. School’s already started and we’re in a new place. I just want to gauge how you’re feeling.” I leaned in the chair then shot right back up when my bare back touched the seat. The sun had been scorching on the black metal chairs. I scooted closer into the shade, hoping to cool it down.