“So I have to rely on your kindness to get my wings,” I said. “I thought Stalin had emancipated us, but I feel just as dependent as ever.” I exhaled and stared out into the vastness of the field. Shouting about the injustice was a waste of precious energy.
“Changes like these can’t happen overnight. Not while stubborn old men like Karlov are in charge. They see women as the bearers of children, the providers of meals, and the scrubbers of floors. Or decoration. But change is happening.”
“You’re a philosopher as well as a pilot,” I observed. “I suppose you’re right, but it never happens fast enough. If he can’t see the need to train anyone with the drive and the brains to fly a plane, he’s no business being an instructor.”
“Well, Moscow agrees with you, Katya, and that’s really all that matters.”
Taisiya grabbed my arm and pulled me into a shadowed corner.
“I heard Cadet Solonev sweet-talked Karlov into letting you fly. How did it go?” The whole academy would know about the flight before I made it back to the barracks. That’s how things worked in any school as small as this.
“I made every mark. What would you expect?”
“Well done, but don’t be glib. It’s already going around the academy that Solonev was sitting with you in the field.” Her brown eyes probed my blue ones, looking for the truth as she might hunt for a blemish.
“And since when is it bad form for a pilot and his navigator to discuss their run after they’ve landed?” I answered, exasperated.
Her grip loosened on my bicep, and she took a deep breath. “As long as that’s all it was. You can’t afford gossip. You’re too close to graduation to risk everything.”
“I know the ‘rules,’ Taisiya,” I said, rubbing my eyes. “It’s nothing.”
Taisiya seemed satisfied and let me pass into the barracks with a quick squeeze to the elbow. As much as I hated to admit it, she wasn’t wrong to warn me of the gossip. It would affect all the women if one of us stepped out of line and got sent home. The instructors would treat all of us badly, as though we had all colluded in her downfall.
Of course, the moment Vanya and I were seen alone together, onlookers’ thoughts immediately turned to the romantic or the inappropriate. The idea that a man and a woman could not share company with a motive such as friendship or business, or in my case with Vanya, simple camaraderie between cadets, caused blood to rush in my ears.
But in the next few weeks, there was no avoiding him, as he used his influence to ensure I would fly as his navigator so I could complete the program.
“You’re lucky to have Solonev in your corner,” Karlov announced in front of the entire class before we went up on our run.
“Indeed I am, Captain. Just as he is lucky to have me as his navigator.”
Vanya winked at me, stifling a chuckle as he hoisted himself onto the wing. “Let’s show him what we can do, eh?” He lowered himself into the front cockpit and signaled to the ground crew once I’d taken my place.
This time he was fearless, flying as though legions of enemy aircraft were on our tail. I would have two seconds to mark my targets, not five, and I felt my fingers shaking with anticipation as I readied my flares. Tokarev had never flown so fast or so daringly in the two years I’d navigated for him. I should have been terrified, sick, or both. But all I felt was my heart pumping and every nerve ending dancing as he glided through the skies, diving and weaving like a magnificent bird of prey. We bandied about the phrase “to have our wings,” but this was the first time I truly felt like I had them. Despite the adrenaline that coursed through my veins, time seemed to slow down to the point where I could almost see the tick marks from the maps I studied in the classroom traced out on the ground.
“Two . . . one . . . marked!”
Vanya released his dummy bomb the precise moment the flare made contact with the ground. Direct hit. Followed by five more.
When we landed on the airstrip, I felt my legs go heavy, as if caked in wet concrete, as I tried to stand. I hated to return to firm ground, like a bird was loath to return to her cage. I would have been happy to fly on to the endless horizon. I wanted to keep going to the far reaches of the globe.
We rejoined our class, exchanging brief smiles. The run was flawless.
“Excellent flying, Solonev. Well done, Ivanova.” Karlov offered my praise almost under his breath, but he couldn’t deny we’d had the best run of the year. For the first time in memory, the class gave a decorous round of applause before the next team took off.
I took a wide stance next to Vanya and watched intently as the others made their runs. The pilots went faster, though fewer of them made their marks.
“Showboating,” he muttered, crossing his arms over his chest and shaking his head.
“Don’t think you’re not responsible,” I whispered, casting him a wink when Karlov wasn’t looking.
He wasn’t able to conceal his grin. “There’s a difference between testing your limits and being foolish,” he said. “And they’ll gain no points with Karlov for this, either.”
Proving Vanya’s case, Karlov rattled off blistering insults to the pilots as they landed, occasionally giving navigators grudging praise for doing well despite their overeager pilots. He dismissed us, and for once I was one of the few in the assembly who hadn’t been dressed down or ignored. I wanted to bound off to the dormitories to tell Taisiya, but Vanya pulled me aside.
“I’m proud of you, Katya. I knew you could do it,” he said quietly so the passing ears couldn’t hear him. “Karlov must not know what to think.” Vanya’s lips were only a few centimeters from my ear, which garnered more attention than his words would have done, so I kept walking, making Vanya change his position.
“He probably thinks that you’ve been slipping me pointers and that I’d not do nearly as well with another pilot,” I countered. And it was partially true. His confidence in the pilot’s seat made my job much easier. I softened my tone. “Thank you for a wonderful run.”
“It was my pleasure. It’s a joy flying with a skilled navigator for once.” I cast my eyes downward at his praise and forced myself to look back at him as he went on. “Just do me a favor and venture over to the men’s tables in the mess hall, would you? It’s important for a pilot to know his navigator.”
Tokarev had shown no interest whatsoever in getting to know me, but Poda, Taisiya’s pilot, had made similar invitations for her to join the men’s tables. When she ventured over, it was always a lonely meal for me at the women’s table, but Poda’s request was a logical one.
“Sure,” I agreed. “It makes sense. I’ll join you for breakfast tomorrow?”
“I’ll look forward to it, so long as you leave your books in your bag.” He flashed a roguish grin, and I couldn’t help but return the smile.
“I can manage for one breakfast, but do your best to be more interesting than a flight manual.”
Back in the women’s barracks, the news of our flight had already made the rounds, and I was greeted with a round of squeals and hugs from each of my bunkmates. It wasn’t just for the flawless run, but because Karlov had, for once in his career, acknowledged a woman as an aviator. It wasn’t just a victory for me; it was a victory for us all.