Telly buzzed me in, and I strolled in to find all the girls already there. With hugs all around and a large wine glass placed in my hand, Telly plopped back on her massive sectional, which took up nearly the whole room. "Tell Mama Telly everything. Who are we killing?"
I laughed even as I glanced around for her wife, Carmen. "Is Carmen here?"
She shook her head. "Carmen and I are having a disagreement. So she is off in Bristol, checking on the clinic there."
Olivia slid Telly a look. "Mm-hmm,” was all she said.
Telly threw up her hands. "Don't look at me like that. I didn't start this argument."
Livy rolled her eyes. "This is classic you, Tell. The moment things are going well, you need to sabotage them. I'm surprised you even got married."
Telly scoffed. "Ugh, harsh."
Livy just shrugged and took a large gulp of wine. "Mm, true."
My gaze darted back and forth. "What's happening?"
Olivia pointed at Telly. "This one is mad at her wife because her wife wants a baby."
Telly jumped in then. "I'm not mad at her. I'm just confused because we agreed we weren't having children."
Olivia shrugged. "Well, it looks like she wants to revisit the idea."
Telly shook her head. "No, we've only been married for six months. Plus, I was very clear that I do not like children. They are sticky and snotty and loud. So loud."
I frowned. "Wait, didn't I see you happily munching on the cheeks of Penny and Sebastian's daughter?"
Her eyes went wide. "That is different. She's a cherub. A little brown cherub. And her cheeks… My God, she has cheeks for days. She has extra, so I alleviated her of some. Look, babies are adorable. They're cute, especially fat babies. Fat babies are the best. I don't trust a skinny baby. But look, I don't want to have my own baby. They smell bad ninety-nine percent of the time. Whether it's that sour milk smell, or the poop smell, or the vomit smell, they just always smell. And they demand attention. Plus, I love our flat. We can't have a baby in a flat. You need a home with a garden and all that stuff. And I am not the pram mommy running around, you know, at brunch and things. Clearly, as much trouble as we get into with heists and the danger... I mean, come on."
Olivia shrugged. "I'm just saying, maybe if you heard her concerns..."
"I don't want a baby. In fact, I said I don't want a baby before we married, and she agreed that she did not need children. But now she says, 'Oh, but wouldn't it be great?' I know what that means, so I told her to take some time and think about what she really wanted out of our relationship. So she went to Bristol."
I winced. "Telly, don’t throw this away. You have to talk.”
She waved a hand. "She'll be back. She will see that I am being sane and rational."
Livy sighed. "For starters, no one would ever call you sane and rational. Secondly, I'm not suggesting that you have a baby, especially since you're so adamantly against it. What I'm suggesting is that you communicate and hear what she's got going on, because sometimes the baby isn't really about the baby."
"No, you haven't seen her. She's got that look. The one where she seems to squish every chubby cherub around. We can't walk ten feet on Sundays for brunch without her just going, 'Ohh, look at the baby.'"
We all sighed. Nyla came in from the kitchen. "Did someone say babies?" She looked terrified.
I laughed. "You're not a fan either?"
She shrugged. "You know, I'm actually not opposed. But God, I love sleep. And sex whenever I want."
"Uh-huh. God, you do have layers. What about you, Liv?"
Livy smiled. "Oh, I love babies. And I think left to his own devices, Ben would have me knocked up and pregnant all the time. I just also happen to love my job. So it's about timing. I'll have to decide when I'm ready. And Telly, when that happens, you can squeeze all the cheeks you want."
Telly clapped. "See? This, I love. I am Auntie Telly. I'm not Mummy. God." She said it really slowly. "And you have great tits, Livy. Your tits would withstand a baby. Mine would not. Or Carmen's. Carmen's already sagging a little bit. I like them though because they're so big. But look, they're not going to withstand stretchmarks and a baby tugging on them all the time. My God, those are my boobies."
Livy snorted so hard she nearly spilled her wine. "Oh my God, I love you, Tell. Jesus."
Telly shrugged. "What? Priorities."
I rolled my eyes. "Guys, can we get back to the problem at hand? Mine?"
"Yeah, sorry." Telly frowned. "Okay, so you're saying Bridge locked you in the bedroom?"
"Yes, but that’s not the point. The point is, I asked him to let me help with Middleton, and he refused. He won't tell me anything. He won't give me any information. He's completely gone back on his word to let me be involved."
Livy pursed her lips. "Yeah, Ben's become reticent as well."
Nyla crossed her arms and paced. "Yeah, you know, East is the same way because, sure, I mean, I came in late. But after we dealt with Garreth Jameson, you’d think they'd be happy to take care of this final asshole, but it's like they've got some plan and they're not sharing."
Telly nodded. "I mean, not that you want to spy on your fiancés, because that would be awful. But… If you did want to spy on your fiancés, you know, there are easy ways to do that."
Nyla frowned. "You’ve met my fiancé, right?"
Telly laughed. "Yes, and I’m a better hacker than he is. I'll have his passwords in no time. If you, you know, if you were to give me permission." The truth was, they were both great hackers, but East was a hair better. No one ever dreamed of telling him that though.
Nyla shook her head. "No, I can't do that. I don't want to do that. But there must be other ways that we can look into what they're doing."
I shook my head. "What if we just let them do their thing and we did our own?"
Telly nodded, leaning forward. "Go on. I'm here for this."
Livy shook her head. "Honestly, let me just ask Ben.”
I shook my head. "No, I don't want to know that there is a plan. I want to be part of it. Toby was my brother."
Everyone glanced around. It was Nyla whose voice was surprisingly soft. She didn't usually take the empathetic route, but she surprised me when she said, "Ems, have you ever thought that they're just trying to protect you? Toby was your brother, but they loved him too. And the fact that you were the one who pointed out their failings means they feel responsible to fix it. And the fact that this has been so remarkably dangerous means they want to keep you out of it and keep you safe. They think it's the least they can do for him."
I shook my head. "There has to be a better way. He was my brother. I wish I could explain. I feel unsettled, and it's like there's a hole in my chest. I can't move forward. I am stuck. And until that last asshole gets what's coming to him, I will stay stuck. I have no closure for myself. Mum has been able to move on past it, but every time I turn around, or I have a question, or some bloke fucks with me, I miss him. I need my brother."