Nick patted me on the shoulder as the two of them wheeled a now doped out Rex to take his X-ray.
I took a deep breath, then another as I stood inside the empty examination room, trying to use my own ‘reiki’ powers to calm down.
It’s OK, I told myself. You are safe and secure. Stuart is just appreciative of your work. Deep breaths, one after the other.
It worked, kinda, but as was often the case when my mind quieted, my grandmother’s voice came to me.
Never let them know what you are, Shannon, love. Never.
Chapter 3
“You OK?” Janey asked, sticking her head through the door. I smiled weakly, and she rushed over and enfolded me in a quick hug. In some ways, contact from humans was both a relief and weird. I didn’t get anything from touching them except physical comfort. I sighed, feeling my body go limp as my friend just held me for a second.
“You’ve got Izzy up next,” she said finally, reluctance clear in her voice.
“It’s OK, I’m OK.”
“You’re not, and I appreciate it.” We walked out into the waiting room together where a very cute, very excited, very nervous Samoyed waited.
“Hi, Carla,” I said brightly to Izzy’s owner, the older woman’s face instantly breaking into a smile. You wouldn’t have thought a dog that looked like twenty kilos of white fluffy cloud would get so anxious, but her head dropped down, her tail wagging furiously as she took us in, then she ducked under her owner’s chair.
“Oh, thank goodness, it’s you. She’s been…” The lady let out a long breath when she saw my expression. “Well, you know.”
I nodded and took a seat beside her, ignoring the dog but putting my hand down between the chairs.
“She’s still quite anxious?”
“Not for a while, but she always starts to get jumpy towards the end of the month. You need to set up a clinic of your own, love. I could come and see you…”
“Never set yourself apart from the power structures,” Nan said. “The cunning women that stayed as hedge witches, they were the first to be strung up and burned. No, it was the ones that became nurses and midwives that survived. Give the humans a reason they can live with to explain what we can do, otherwise they’ll provide you with one, and it won’t be to your advantage.”
“Oh, I could never do that to Stuart. This place is family to me.” I glanced over to Janey, who gave me a wink. A cold wet nose was thrust into my fingers as Izzy sniffed my palm, getting a whole bunch of information from the scents she picked up. My breakfast, which she visualised as the foods she salivated over at her owner’s feet when Carla was at the dining table, the shampoo and soap I used, which was vaguely repellent to her, and the smell of my dogs and Rex. Pain, fear, the feelings spiked through the dog, and I knew if I looked at her, I’d find her hunching down further.
“Izzy…”
I pushed reassurance, love, and calm as I said her name. Both her owner and the dog visibly relaxed, Izzy’s flibbertigibbet mind a chaotic clash of her rapidly spiralling anxieties and the mental images I pushed. Izzy, safe and up on the couch next to Carla, her owner patting her luxurious fur over and over. Following Carla everywhere, to the bathroom, toilet, the home office she worked at, constantly curled up around her feet. The bliss she felt when Carla came home, even if she’d only gone out for half an hour. The listening to Carla’s breath even out as she fell asleep, letting Izzy know it was safe to do the same.
“C’mon, girl,” I said, taking the bag of treats Janey had brought around to me. Izzy shuffled out from under the chair, ears pricked. While she was a nervous dog, she was also very food motivated. Instantly, I was flooded by memories of crunching the thin slices of dried liver, the intense rush of sensations and tastes, her mouth starting to salivate as they flooded her prefrontal cortex.
I kept a steady flood of yummy and calming thoughts pushed her way as she padded across the floor after me.
“I’ll use consult room one,” I said to Janey, who just nodded, watching the transformation in Izzy with a smile.
“You’re so good with her,” Carla enthused as she picked the dog up and put her on the metal table. Izzy instantly pushed her muzzle into her owner’s chest, but the minute I crackled the packet of treats, she turned around. She stayed within close vicinity of her owner, but she sat as soon as she had turned around and raised a paw, knowing what came next.
“Very good, girl!” I enthused, shaking her paw. I kept my voice high and with that kind of overexcited tone that children’s television presenters tend to use, because dogs looooved it. It was the closest reaction I think they got that approximated their own wholehearted love of life. I gave her a treat, which she munched quickly. “Down, girl,” I said, and she obediently dropped to her stomach for another. I knew I had her relaxing when she rolled over, exposing her fluffy white belly to me. “Oh, who’s a good girl!” I said over and over, scratching her tummy.
“All right, I’m starting now,” I said to Carla, who just nodded. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and then went in.
What Carla assumed was some kind of New Age healing session was actually more like psychic doggy psychology. I zipped through Izzy’s thoughts and experiences for the month, finding the snarls of fear and anxiety and replacing them with little pockets of reassurance and pleasant memories of Carla. Her owner loved her, and there was no evidence of mistreatment in her mind. Like a small part of any population, she was highly sensitive. Her nervous system worked overtime as it reacted to every kind of stimuli. Normal things, like the sound of a car horn or another dog barking, were like small bombs going off inside the dog. There, deep in her being, was a burning need to make sure she and Carla were safe.
So I worked on that. While for all intents and purposes I was ‘laying on hands,’ really, I was gently, persistently removing the many things that got in her way and strengthened that need and sense of purpose. I smoothed and I shored up, I redirected and I encouraged, I stroked and I soothed, until finally, I felt like the dog was going to make it through the month.
I had to grab the table when I was finished, feeling the sudden wave of dizziness that came from deep workings like this. Normally, I would have rescheduled, as the trauma of dealing with a hurt dog, like Rex, took its toll.
“Are you all right, love?” Carla asked, placing a soft hand on my shoulder.
For a second, I couldn’t answer, the room spinning as my head felt as light as a balloon, floating higher and higher, while my fingers dug hard into the metal consulting table, as if that would be enough to keep me down. But then just as quickly as it came on, the feeling faded away, and there was just me, a very concerned looking Carla, and a bright-eyed Izzy, waving her big plume of a tail at me.
“I’m fine,” I said finally. “Sorry to give you a scare. The energy transfer was a bit intense today, and we had Rex in before…”
“The Gordons’ dog?” Carla’s brows creased. “Is he OK?”
“I think so.” I produced another treat, something that had Izzy now quivering with excitement as she sat and waited for me to give it to her. “Good girl!” She quickly munched it down and then sat very still as I wrapped an arm around her, burying my face in her soft fur. “Now stop fighting me each time you come, girl, and this will be a lot easier for both of us!”