“I’m a horrible person, Kian. I can’t believe I allowed myself to forget what was happening for even a few minutes, let alone hours,” she said as she climbed from the bed, wishing she wasn’t naked, but reminding herself he’d seen her unclothed body too many times to count. Still, the vulnerability of being naked wasn’t what she needed right now.
“You have gone through a lot these past few weeks. Letting your mind and body go doesn’t make you a bad person,” he told her.
The sight of him lying there, looking so handsome with stubble on his cheeks and a spark in his eyes, almost made her want to turn back to him, made her want to climb on top of him. But she wasn’t that same girl she’d been when she was his. She was stronger now, and she’d made a mistake coming to his place.
“I had a nightmare, and then you were there, and I needed to forget,” she admitted.
He frowned for only a moment before his lips turned up in a grin that made her forget she was still standing in the middle of the room naked.
“You needed me,” he told her as he licked his lips. “And, admit it or not, you haven’t forgotten anything about us because you responded perfectly to my touch.”
“I’m not having this discussion with you,” she said as she turned away from him and began making her way toward his bathroom. Escape was all that was on her mind right now.
She practically ran to his bathroom, then drooled at the size of his massive shower with four different nozzles. She wasn’t sure if they all did the same thing or not, so she simply began turning them.
When hot steam began filling the gigantic space and water cascaded down, she decided she wasn’t going to ever leave this amazing shower. Though the scent of Kian’s shampoo and body wash made her think of him in ways she didn’t want to, she had no choice but to use it, knowing she was going to be thinking of him each time she inhaled today.
Maybe she’d pull herself together enough to stop being so selfish and would forget all about their night together and the fact that his smell was now coating her. She doubted it, but she could dream, she assured herself.
Taking a far shorter shower than she would have liked, she ignored the ache of her muscles and the soreness between her thighs. It had been a long time since she’d made love, more than four years, in fact, and, unfortunately, she was going to be reminded about it over the next few days whether she wanted to or not.
Right now, her only focus should be on her niece. Maybe her sister and she hadn’t ever been close, but Roxie would have never wished her only relative to perish in the way she had. She was filled with regret that she hadn’t tried harder to bring them back together. It wasn’t her sister’s fault she’d turned into the woman she had. They’d both been raised by their father, who’d been an abusive drunk. Pamela had turned to drugs and men, while Roxie had decided to freeze anyone and everyone out of her life. They both had demons to bear; they’d just chosen to deal with them in entirely different ways.
Grabbing a robe from the back of the door, she wrapped herself in it, ashamed as she stepped back into the bedroom. She really had no other choice but to put on the same clothes from the day before. Luckily, though, she’d spotted a hair dryer in the bathroom, so she grabbed her strewn clothes from the floor and slipped back inside before Kian could return to the bedroom.
She cleaned her panties and dried them off before dressing in her wrinkled clothes. Roxie had never before had to do a walk of shame from a man’s house, but it appeared as if she was going to experience many firsts in her life with Kian. Why change things now?
Though she had no idea what his address was, she decided she’d figure it out and sneak from his place as quietly as possible and call a cab or Uber driver. She didn’t think she could bear to be in a vehicle with him with his eyes raking over her. There was too much up in the air, and for now, she wanted to do what she did best—run away.
When she stepped from the bedroom and caught the scent of freshly brewed coffee, her mouth watered. But in order for her to get some, she’d certainly have to face Kian again. She was torn. As she began moving through his massive house, she decided escape was more important than caffeine.
Her cell phone was dead, and she needed to find a phone. She was sure there was one in the kitchen, but she couldn’t remember where that was. He had to have an office somewhere with a phone. Hopefully, on the side of the house opposite from where he was. She didn’t mind running right now. It seemed to be her best option.
As she turned another corner, the smells of coffee and bacon made her stomach rumble so loudly, it was as if thunder was crackling. Embarrassment made her cheeks flush as she came face-to-face with a tiny woman, who smiled at her.
“Good thing I’ve made a large breakfast,” the older woman said with a laugh as she pointed to the table. “Grab a cup of coffee and sit down. I’ll dish you up.”
“I can’t stay for food. I have to . . .” Roxie began before her words faded. She wasn’t sure what she was going to do now.
The woman tsked at her while she began piling food on a plate. Roxie knew she could ignore the woman and run from the room, but she’d always had a difficult time hurting anyone’s feelings. She assured herself her desire to stay had nothing to do with the fact that she was starving, and the woman’s cooking smelled fantastic.
“I need to make a phone call and collect my niece,” she said, attempting to leave the room again.
“Lily has already eaten, and she’s lying in the living room watching a cartoon,” the woman said.
“Oh.” She was already failing as a parent. Someone else was taking care of Lily’s basic needs. That wasn’t a good thing.
“She’s a beautiful little girl,” the woman told her. “Get your coffee.”
She decided to quit arguing. Lily was safe, and Roxie really didn’t know what she was going to do next, anyway. She just really wanted to avoid Kian after her pathetic night of begging him to love her. Not exactly the homecoming she’d been expecting or wanting.
By the time she was done making her coffee, the woman had dished up enough food to feed three people. With the workout she’d gotten the night before, sadly, she could probably eat that amount.
“Thank you,” Roxie told her quietly, wondering how many times this woman had fed Kian’s mistresses. The thought was enough to ruin her appetite. The lady didn’t seem at all surprised to find a woman in the house. Forcing herself to push that thought right out of her mind, Roxie ate, barely tasting the delicious meal.
The woman continued moving around the kitchen as she cleaned up the dishes she’d used to cook and keep the food warm on the stove. There was no sign of Kian anywhere, and Roxie assured herself that was a good thing. She finished her meal before realizing how rude she’d been.
“I should have introduced myself. I’m Roxie,” she told the lady with a sheepish smile.
“I know about you,” the woman said, and for some reason the way she said it made Roxie’s cheeks heat again as she looked down at the table. She in no way wanted to ask the woman for an explanation of that statement. “I’m Tilly.”
“It’s great to meet you, Tilly. Can you tell me where the nearest telephone is?” Roxie asked.