All the sex. The booze. The literal stupid shit we did in high school. The drugs. Then college. Joining a fraternity.
And she was here. Working. Caring for her mom, her grandmother.
I’d been living life, but I’d not been appreciating it while I did it, and her, she hadn’t been living, but she would’ve appreciated every second of it if she had.
Fuck.
Fuck!
She was there, here, under my nose, and I never saw her.
“Why’d that jackass let you go?”
“Jackass?” She was back to whispering.
“Your boyfriend in high school. Didn’t you have another one? Earlier too?”
“Oh.” She shrugged. “Roy. Just grew apart. He’s got a new fiancée now.”
“He’s a dumb shit jackass then.” I shook my head, only looking at her now. “And the other one? He was a worse jackass, wasn’t he?”
She shrugged again. “He was a learning phase, that’s all. That’s when things were starting to go bad for my parents, my dad, and I clung to a different type of guy. He turned out to not be good for me, but I got out of that relationship. Roy was the opposite of him, and what I needed at the time.”
“Want me to beat him up?”
Her lips twitched, the faintest smile, and damn, that sight made my heart race. “No. That’s okay.”
I grunted. “You sure?”
Her smile grew, and that was a reward by itself.
8
AVA
Time went too fast and too slow all at the same time.
After that day with Zeke, we packed up Grandmum and moved her to the nursing home. I worked full-time at Manny’s, but I also worked part-time at a horse stable outside of Fallen Crest. It was new, and the main point was to offer boarding and equine therapy. It had recently become a place for rescue horses as well. I liked the balance between the two jobs. One was pouring drinks or serving people food, and the other was helping with the horses. I did most of the office work, but there were times I snuck out to the barn and spent time with the horses. There was a magical calmness to them that was addictive once I picked up how to feel it. I was in good standing with both jobs, so they let me scale back time in order to be with Grandmum.
My mom and a few of her friends were packing up the house, and she took me to her new place.
She was right, as much as I hated to admit it. It was a one-floor apartment in a house, and it was all hers. The whole place was wheelchair-accessible, and I met some of the housemates on the other floors. Next to the building was a health clinic, so they had nurses there and they had a system if any assistance was needed for off-hours.
It was a good setup for her.
And I was at the grocery store, because she needed food since she insisted I take most of what we had.
“Ava?” I was in aisle eight, grabbing soup when someone said my name.
I frowned. “Jarrod?”
“Hey. Hi.” My ex before the last ex, the jackass I’d been just talking to Zeke about. Had our conversation brought him back to town? He held a hand up, giving me a grin. He was taller, if that was possible. Maybe six-three. A faded jean jacket over a black muscle shit. Jeans that matched his jacket, frayed, worn, but also trendy. His dark hair was messy. He was super tan, but not in a great way, though judging from the smirk he was giving me, I was thinking maybe he didn’t agree with my last thought.
Jarrod always thought he was the king shit. I was thinking that hadn’t changed. He was as lean as he’d been back in high school, but he seemed more solid.
“How are you?” He moved closer, holding a bag of bread in his hand. Nothing else. He motioned around the grocery store. “I saw you when I was grabbing my stuff, and thought there was no way it was the same Ava from back in the day. But it is. Look at you. You look great.”
He had hit me. On more than one occasion.
He had torn me down, one insult after another.
When I was happy, he wanted to take that away, and he had. Every time until I learned it was better not to be happy around him.
All those memories came flashing back, pushing to the forefront, and behind them was the reason why I was here in the first place. To get food for my mom, because she was moving, because it was time to sell the house, because my grandmum was dying. Other decisions that had happened without my say, that were affecting me, just like he had.
“What are you doing here?”
He gave a shrug. “Family reunion. We’re camped out at Kade Campsite. You know where that place is? It’s new, but pretty cool.”
“You’re only in town for the reunion? You’re leaving right after?”
His eyes sparked, and not in a nice way. He began to open his mouth, but then–“Ava, you were getting the soup? I was supposed to get the pizzas.” Another person joined our group, and Zeke stopped next to me, looking down at his phone before lifting his face. A frown in place, but Zeke made sure to step somewhat in front of me before seeing Jarrod. “Oh, hey! You’re Jarrod Oster, aren’t you?” He held out his hand. “Zeke Allen. You remember me? We went to different schools, but I remember you.”
Zeke and I hadn’t talked since that day he helped me when I was drunk. It was a bittersweet moment for me. The first time I got drunk. A friend helped me out, and we talked the entire rest of the day. He made food for me, showed me his beautiful home before he gave me a ride home and then saw where I lived.
I was proud of our house. It wasn’t much. A bit run-down with peeling paint, a few cracks in the sidewalk, a few rotting porch posts, but it was my home. It would always be my home. Of that, I was very sure. Everything else, not so much, but I’d never have another home like that.
So yeah, when Zeke dropped me off, a part of me could’ve shriveled up in embarrassment.
That was the younger me. This different me stood proud and I brought him in, showed him around, and we sat and talked even longer in my living room.
I must’ve fallen asleep because when I woke up, I was in my room and he was gone.
That’d been six days ago.
Jarrod had gone still now, his head edging back before he straightened to his fullest height. “Yeah, man. Allen. I remember you, too. Academy, right?”
“Right.” Zeke’s tone was dropping the friendliness, and he edged even more in front of me. “You left school back then. Why the fuck you back?”
Okay. Yeah. All pretenses were gone. Zeke’s tone was low and dangerous, a warning.
Jarrod’s head snapped back, but those eyes turned mean too. “I’m saying hello to an ex-girl–”
“She’s not your ex.” Zeke was fully in front of me, his back to tight and tense, though his tone was almost soft. Eerily. “She’s not your anything because the time you had back then wasn’t anything, but haunts and lessons. Lessons like never going for another guy like you again. You taught her that.” His head clipped down in a nod. “Now, you get going. I’ll pay for your bread if that’s the case why you’re still standing here, being all hesitant.”
“You might want to watch–”
“No,” Zeke shot out. “I don’t think so because unlike Ava, I know where you’ve been. And I know another guy who was in the same place. Potomahmen. He’s all the way connected too. Won’t be too much work to give him a call if I need to.”