“That’s such fucking bullshit,” Dante said. “What if there is only one person who wants out?”
“Then the faces of the other participants are blurred out. Privacy is protected.” Lucas took a large drink, and I had to laugh.
“You do realize how crazy that sounds.”
Lucas shrugged. “It’s worked before.”
“You mean a tape has been exposed.”
“Yes. Lives have been ruined. Once you start this journey, expect to be fully immersed or lose everything. Those are the rules.”
“I didn’t have a chance to back out,” I said. “I didn’t want any part of this and I’m still here.”
“Your dad took matters into his own hands.”
“Wait, I thought that was you,” Gideon said, looking at his father. “I told you she wasn’t cooperating.”
“And I went to The Society. There are certain levels of formality. We’re not … monsters. They would have terminated her profile and allowed her to live outside the walls in freedom. The girls get to pick. It’s their choice.”
I rubbed at my temples, feeling the start of a headache brewing. “This is all a little too much for me,” I said. “My dad broke the rules?”
“Yes. We weren’t aware of the rule breaking.” Lucas turned to Gideon.
“I thought you had sent her father to deal with it.” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “I had no idea I had to tell you everything. You told me you were dealing with it.”
“Yes, The Society was in the process of removing Sian when she began to agree.”
“And the moment Halloween night came, I got my lovely tattoo and I’m now in.”
“Yes, which again makes me wonder why your father would go to such extreme levels. You’re in, he’s not,” Lucas said.
“Huh?”
“I know it’s all a little confusing. The arrangement was made for you to have the chance your mother never had. The deal was struck, but Alexander wasn’t a member. He hadn’t done the leg work. Hadn’t done the time. Being part of The Society takes a certain level of finesse, and he doesn’t have it. I think he wanted to be part of it, and now he’s working to bring it down. Coach Bilson worked for him, but he didn’t realize it. He thought he was taking orders from The Society.”
I stopped Lucas by holding my hand up. “Hold on. I thought The Society was supposed to be top secret. No one should talk about it for fear of what they could do.”
“And in most instances, it is completely accurate.”
“But?” I asked.
“But there are those who know who may have tried to be initiated. Coach Bilson comes from a good family. He has good genetics, the making of a champion. The Society goes for all kinds of people, rich and poor. What they have to have is the ability to withstand whatever is thrown at them.”
I frowned as I leaned forward. “You’re telling me that we’re not the only place where The Society is … rife?”
Lucas glanced around the room and took a deep breath. “You can never bring down The Society. It’s everywhere and nowhere. We’re not the only school, or the only people who are part of it. There are different sections, entirely different members. All Saints is one of many places it is inside.”
“Bringing it down isn’t an option?” I asked.
“No. There’s no way to bring it down. What Alexander is doing is going to destroy many lives, and we can’t let that happen. The Society will always be around. It’s not going.”
Sitting back, I folded my arms, amazed. I thought we were the only ones, but that made me a fool. A naïve fool. Of course an organization would be vast and wide.
“Does it go across countries?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“Are all the initiation processes the same?” I had so many questions.
“No.”
“Is The Society the same for everyone?”
“No.”
“Ugh.” I got to my feet and moved toward the window. “You’re talking in riddles.”
“It can’t be the same,” Mateo said. “It would die out, right? It needs to be … different. Ever-changing. Something that big wouldn’t last.”
“Not only that, people wouldn’t want to join. Four men, one girl, sounds like a dream, but to others, it’s not.” Lucas ran a hand down his face. “The Society is many things. Sometimes good. Sometimes bad. You need to learn to accept both parts of it. The good and the bad.”
“What’s the good?” I asked.
“Huh?”
“I already get the bad parts. I’ve seen that firsthand, but what the fuck is the good parts? Do you even know?” I felt lost, like I was drowning in an ocean with no way to get out. Heather died. My life as I know it was fucked up, and here Lucas was trying to tell me there was good and bad.
“You want to know some of the good? They handle the pieces of shit and scum that roam this earth,” Lucas said.
“Come again?” I asked.
“Humans are the worst creatures on this planet. We all know that. The shit we do to other beings, let alone each other, it is enough to make a person sick. The Society … helps to purge those that shouldn’t have taken breath.”
“You mean like murderers, rapists?”
“Pedophiles, dirty cops, that kind of thing. They provide the opportunity to bring them down. Then of course it is finding certain people across all walks of life and making them shine. No one knows why the girl from the wrong side of the tracks went to a prestigious school, but the next thing you know, she’s an up-and-coming actress, or a lawyer, or running for politics. The Society is everything and everywhere. It is good and bad, and it is in all of the obvious places, and where you never think to look.”
“I need some air.” Turning on my heel, I left the room. This was too much information. My brain was on overload. I made my way straight toward the door leading out into the gardens.
I took a huge gulp of breath as I got outside. There was a slight chill in the air, and I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to ward off all kinds of bad shit. I missed Drew so much. I missed my mom, or the few good memories I had of her where she wasn’t out of it.
My dad had taken her from me one time too many. He’d gotten away with so much, and I hated it. Hated him with a fiery passion.
Someone cleared their throat, and I spun around to find Dante had followed me.
“Don’t you have more information to get out of him?” I asked.
“There’s nothing more we can do. Coach Bilson has been removed from the school. He won’t harm anyone else.” Dante came to me, looking so sad. “How are you holding up?”
“I’m here, aren’t I?” I asked. “I’m still surviving.” I blew out a breath. I didn’t know how I was doing it.
To be honest, I felt like I was dangling on a very thin rope. Running my fingers through my hair, I felt the odd ends of my hair, and for some reason, I laughed.
“Can you believe everything that’s happening? My plan when I started school was to work my ass off so I could get into a good college. I was going to take the necessary classes to appease my mom and dad, but my focus was going to be on English. I love writing stories and since I’ve been around you guys, I haven’t put a single word down.” I shook my head at how messed up my life had gotten.