“Harry.” I rolled my eyes at him.
“What? I’m telling the truth. You know you’re the only woman I actually spend the night with.”
“Yay for me. I’m your best friend. You spend the night with me.”
“Well, hey, you know, I don’t want to commit to anyone. I don’t want them to expect anything.”
“So what, you just hit it and quit it?”
“Come on now, Sarah, that’s so crass.”
“But it’s true, right? You have sex with these women and then you just leave them by themselves.”
“I don’t have sex with all the women, Sarah. I’m not some side of some sort of pig.”
“Aha, sure you’re not. What about these three different women that I’m buying presents for, have you had sex with them?”
“Actually, I’ve not slept with any of them.” He looked proud.
“Really?” I was shocked. “You haven’t slept with any of them?”
“No. And there’s a reason for that.”
“What’s the reason for that?”
“It’s the holiday season, Sarah. If you’re sleeping with a woman in the holiday season and you’re buying her presents, she’s going to think that you’re her man. She’s going to want to introduce you to her family and to her friends and she’s going to want a label.” He shook his head. “I’m not interested in meeting anyone’s family. I’m not interested in meeting anyone’s friends. I’m not interested in calling anyone a girlfriend and heaven forbid someone expects they’re going to become engaged to me.”
“Oh wow, Harry. So what, you’re never going to get married?”
“I didn’t say I’m never going to get married, but it’s not like it’s coming up any time soon.”
“Okay. So then why am I buying these presents? Why do you care?”
“Because they’re pretty girls and they like to go to events.” He looked down at me again and then pulled on my pigtail again. “If you liked to go to events, I wouldn’t have to do this.”
“I’m not going to go to events with you, Harry. You know I hate that sort of thing.”
“I know you hate that sort of thing, but that’s the life you were born into, Sarah,” he said softly. “You’re a socialite. You’re in this world. You can’t just run away from it forever.”
“Well, Harry, I already have. I don’t want to be a part of that. I don’t want people judging me on how much money I have and what clothes I wear. I care about more important things than that.”
“I know you do, Sarah, but your parents’ business...” He paused.
“What?”
“You’re the only one there to take care of it, right? Your mom and your dad, they want you to take the reins.”
“But I don’t want to do that, Harry. I studied history in undergrad. I studied history in grad school. I wanted to go on and get my PhD, but...”
“I know,” he sighed. “I understand.” And he did. He knew that my life was about books and reading and history. I didn’t want to get involved in corporate America, but my father had a multi-million dollar company and I was an only child.
“You’re lucky,” I said to Harry.
“Why?”
“Because you have four brothers, you know if you didn’t want to carry on the company, Ethan would, or Jack would, or Dylan, even Joshua.”
“No, I don’t think Joshua would be interested.” He laughed.
“Well, you know you have options.”
“Yeah, but I love the company. It is my company, right. I’m Harry Parker Huntington. I’m going to be the next CEO of Huntington Corporation.”
“Yeah. And that’s great for you, Harry, because that’s what you want. But I don’t want that for myself.”
“Oh, Sarah. I know. Do you want me to talk to your parents again?”
“No, it’s okay. Let’s just watch a movie. I don’t want to think about it right now.”
“Okay.” Then he started undoing his pants.
“What are you doing, Harry?”
“What? I’m not going to get on the bed in these khakis, they’re not comfortable, they’re brand new.”
“Oh my gosh. You’re going to just lie on my bed in your boxer shorts and that’s it?”
“Are you uncomfortable with that? I mean, that’s how we always lie together.”
“Well, I guess it’s fine.” I shrugged and then walked over to the light switch. “Lights on or lights off?”
“Turn them off, I think.” He grinned at me. “That way, if we do fall asleep, neither one of us will have to get up and turn the lights off.”
“True. That’s good thinking.” I turned the light off and then walked back over to the bed and got on top of the covers. I leaned back into the headboard and stared at him. “Do you think this is weird?”
“Do I think what is weird?” He looked at me with a confused expression.
“Do you think it’s weird that we’re best friends in our twenties, watching movies together, sleeping in the same bed and we’re not actually together?”
“No, I don’t think so. Why, do you think it’s weird?”
“No, but I just think, right, if I had a boyfriend, would he be happy with this? And if you had a girlfriend, would she be happy with this?”
“Well, it’s a good thing that neither one of us has a boyfriend or a girlfriend, right? We can do what we want to do.”
“But yeah, what happens when that changes?”
“When’s it going to change?” He shook his head. “I have no plans on getting a girlfriend anytime soon.” And with that, he turned away and it occurred to me that he didn’t even think that it was possible that I could get a boyfriend anytime soon. Inside, I felt pretty angry and pretty sad as he pulled me into his arms and I lay my head on his chest. I realized that it was always just going to be like this. This closeness without intimacy. And that’s not what I wanted, for as much as I loved my friendship with Harry, I wanted more than that. I wanted more than this and I was going to have it whether or not he thought I could or not.
Chapter 4
Harry
“To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before.” I read the title on the screen and then cursed under my breath. “To All the Fucking Boys I’ve Loved Before. Sarah, are you serious right now? I’m not watching a movie called To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before. That’s fucking worse than watching Love Actually, and you know I hate that movie too.”
“Don’t lie, Harry. You love Love Actually. I think you even love our tradition more than me.”
“I promise you, Sarah, I do not love our tradition. I can spend New Year’s Eve without watching that movie. I betcha this New Year’s Eve, we don’t watch it. I bet you a hundred dollars I don’t ask to see it.”
“Harry. She looked at me with big brown eyes. “I know you’re sentimental and I know you’re going to want to watch it.”