“I promise you that it took me forever to find a home, sweetheart. I’m not just going to leave it.”
She lets out a breath that shudders through her body. The relief literally comes off of her in waves. So, I let her have that. I don’t explain that she’s my home. That I’ve spent a lifetime making fun of love and the hoops my brothers jumped through. I don’t explain that she’s everything I’ve wanted my entire life and never knew truly existed.
She’s it for me.
And come hell or high water, I’m going to be it for her, too.
13
Finley
Two days later and I’m still a mess. There’s no other way to describe it. Cade and I seem to fit seamlessly. We laugh, we talk, work together and every moment I spend with him seems better than the last. Hell, even lying in bed with him listening to him breathe is better than anything I’ve ever experienced. Cade seems so positive, so confident. Me? I’m a freaking mess who might have fallen in love in less than a week.
In love.
Jesus.
Today, we had dinner at the Avalanche, a local pub in Sweetheart, with my brother. He’s not very happy with me, but he’s been quietly accepting about it. I’m not sure why. I figured he would go ape shit. My brother likes to have me close enough to try and control what happens to me—without letting me know that’s what he’s doing. It doesn’t work, but I don’t call him on his shit most of the time. When I lived in Nevada, I thought he was going to go insane. I think he was glad when I finally called him to get me out of the mess my so-called parents were living in. I never regretted the decision. I love my brother, but I still feel the need to spread my wings more.
I’m just not sure spreading my wings with Cade is smart…
“Earth to Finn,” Larry says, and I force myself to look at him and snap back into attention instead of zoning out.
“Sorry, I was thinking,” I tell him. We’re standing outside of the Avalanche. Larry is standing beside his bike. Cade and I walked over to meet him. I needed to drop off some paperwork at A-Plus Realtors for Emma who is assisting the city on finding someone to take over the shelter.
“That’s something you’re doing entirely too much of,” Larry chastises.
“Larry,” I sigh out feeling really old and tired.
“Do you remember what I told you when you first came to live with me, Finley?”
I smile because I do remember, but I also love the way he can alternate between calling me Finn when he’s just talking, but his voice goes tender and he calls me Finley when he thinks he should handle me with care.
“I was worried about fitting in and what the kids at school would think about me,” I answer.
“And what did I tell you, Finley?”
“You said as your sister I was part of the Saints now and here we live wild and embrace it. We don’t answer to the outside world. We make our own rules and fuck anyone that doesn’t understand.”
“And it’s even more true today.”
“I still don’t think you should have taught an eight-year-old girl to say fuck,” I mutter. He shrugs clearly not agreeing.
“Did I ever thank you for coming to rescue me and for giving my mom that money to stay out of my life?”
“It was worth every bit of that twenty-grand,” he shrugs.
“Twenty? I thought you told me you gave her ten thousand?” I gasp. “You shouldn’t have given her one damn dime,” I tell him, getting upset all over again.
“Bullshit. To get you away from her, Finley? I’d have paid her anything she asked and then some.”
“I love you big brother,” I respond, feeling tears sting my eyes. He envelopes me in a hug and I just hold him close. “I’m going to miss you, Larry,” I whisper finally.
“You’re part of the Saints, beautiful. I’m never too far away and if I can’t be there, one of my brothers will be.” He squeezes me and then steps back, looking at Cade. “Am I right?” he says, staring at him.
“I’ll be there,” Cade says, making my heart flutter in my chest. Larry gives him a nod and then hops on his bike and takes off without another word. I watch him go and until Cade wraps his arms around me from behind, his chin pressing into the curve of my neck, I don’t realize I’m crying.
“You’ll see him again, Red. You know as well as I do that man is not going to let you go, ever.”
“I know. I just…It’s going to be hard being away from him,” I whisper, my heart hurting.
“You could stay in Sweetheart,” Cade answers, letting me go so he can turn me to face him.
“No, I need to move,” I answer stubbornly. I don’t know why I feel so strongly about that, but I do.
“Okay,” he answers, not elaborating at all. He takes my hand, holding it as we start walking back toward the shelter.
“That’s it? Just okay?” I mumble, and I think I’m upset he’s not trying to talk me into staying.
Or going with him.
“Are you still planning on leaving Colorado, Red?” he asks, his thumb brushing against the back of my hand.
“Yes,” I insist. “But don’t think that means I’m going to follow you to Kentucky, Cade. I still say we could do a long-distance relationship until we see if we’re going to work. I don’t need a man with me constantly.”
“I know, Red,” he says, as he stops walking. He pulls me around to face him, his hand sliding along the side of my neck. His lips are close to mine. My heart beats erratically as I stare up into his dark, heated eyes.
“I need you to hear me, Cade. I don’t need a man,” I repeat, and I don’t know if I’m trying to convince him or myself.
“I know, Red.”
“You do?” I ask, feeling more than a little disappointed.
“You need me, sweetheart,” he groans, right before he takes my mouth in a kiss that I will never forget—not even if I live to be a hundred.
14
Keys
Red has been quiet since we ate at the Avalanche. I know she’s worrying about leaving her brother. She’s also worrying about the two of us. I could tell her to save herself some trouble. I’m not leaving Colorado without her and she sure as hell is not leaving without me. That’s just the facts, but I haven’t pushed it. I’d prefer she comes to that conclusion on her own. I lock the door and head upstairs to the bedroom. Red went up there over an hour ago, saying she had a headache.
I don’t know if she did, or if she just needed time to herself. I gave it to her, because I know leaving her brother is weighing on her. When I get to the bedroom, the lights are out. I undress in the dark and climb into the bed. I feel her stiffen when I pull her back into my body and sigh. This can’t keep going on.
“Head still hurting, Red?”
“I’m okay,” she whispers.
“Now, why don’t I believe you?” I murmur, kissing the back of her head and settling her sweet body against me.
“I have a lot to do tomorrow. I’ve got to get everything ready for the adoption event, Cade.”