He chuckled. “I’m pretty sure I always make you come first, wife-to-be.”
Yeah you do. And thank the Thunder gods for that.
A Viking in Vegas
Ella
"A toast!" Anika declared, lifting her glass and drunkenly swaying from side to side as she stood, staring at me with tears in her eyes. "To my best friend, Ella. May you have a long, beautiful and sexually fulfilling life together."
Cheers and catcalls followed her speech, glasses clinking and laughter spilling as drinks were consumed (and spilled) in my honor.
My bachelorette party might have gotten more than a little out of control. I should have known this would be the case when my sister-in-law, Liv, had declared she'd booked us a weekend away in Vegas.
Gunnar had agreed that I could attend on three conditions; that he got to host his bachelor party the same weekend in Vegas, that we shared a hotel room, and that I guaranteed that at least one of our party remained sober.
In good faith, I'd invited Farrah, Anika's sister, to be our sober member. She'd agreed and currently was the only one not swaying on her seat.
The day had started innocently enough; love-making with Gunnar in our suite, a late brunch, a walk around the strip, and a leisurely afternoon massage at the resort spa. Then Liv had kidnapped me and the bachelorette debauchery had begun in earnest.
Around the table sat Anika and Liv, along with Gunnar's other sister, Astrid, their brother Rune's fiancé, Gabby, their other brother Erik's fiancé, Laura, and the sober but merry Farrah.
I tossed my head, brunette hair spilling over my shoulders as I laughed at Anika's toast, blowing an air-kiss her way. She reached up, her long limbs stretching to catch it.
"Love you!" I shouted, tipping my glass her way.
"Love you more!"
"My turn!" Liv, my soon-to-be sister-in-law rose, also wobbling a little on her heels. "To the woman who finally got my brother to put a ring on it. May you have a long and happy life together…." She paused dramatically, waiting for us to hush. "Because none of us want him back!"
"Here, here!" Yelled Astrid, raising her beer bottle. "Just take them away. All of them."
Around the table the women fell about, cackling.
"A toast," I declared, lifting my glass, tears of hilarity streaming down my face. "To men with big dicks!"
Liv and Astrid groaned, tossing napkins my way, while Anika, Farrah, and Gabby lifted their drinks, whistling and yelling agreement.
"Okay, we're due at the Aussie Heat show in fifteen minutes." Farrah reached for Astrid, helping her to stand. "If we start walking now, maybe you guys will sober a little before we get there."
"Psh," Liv responded dismissively, waving her hand and knocking over an empty beer bottle. "We're only tipsy."
"Huh-uh," Farrah steadied Astrid then reached for Liv, helping her up. "Up you go."
With giggling, stumbling effort we made it outside and into the warm night.
"I could get used to this," Astrid said, closing her eyes and tipping her head towards the sky. "Warm nights and hot days. Beats snow any day of the week."
"But no ocean," I reminded her, leaning into Anika. "You'd hate it."
"There's no other option then, I simply must make enough money to allow me to live in Australia."
Giggling, I wrapped my free arm around her shoulder, the three of us trailing after Farrah, Laura, and Liv.
"I need to touch up my lipstick," Liv complained as we stumbled our way down the strip.
"Now?" Farrah asked.
"Yes! Where's my tote?"
"Here," Farrah crouched with a sigh, shrugging our bags off her shoulder and beginning to sort them out on the sidewalk. "Which is yours?"
"That—"
A man wearing only glitter, baby oil, and a sparkling red G-string swooped down, backhanding Farrah, sending her sprawling. In the same action he bent, snatching one of the bags and sprinting away, clearing a fast path through the crowded side walk.
"What the fuck!"
"That's my bag!"
"Is that a stripper?"
"Get him!"
Adrenaline surged through our drunk bodies, clearing a little of the brain fog. We leapt forward, running down the sidewalk, screaming like banshees at the man's back.
Beside me, Anika pulled a rolling pin from her bag, Gabby snatching it from her. With perfect aim she threw it, sending it spiraling through the air to clock the guy on the back of his head. He stumbled, falling with a crash to the ground.
With a triumphant scream, we converged on him, Liv recovering her bag, Astrid and Gabby sitting on his back, Anika and me taking either leg, with Laura thumping him over the head with her bag. Farrah, the only sensible one in the group, snatched his hands, pulling them over his head and holding them down.
"Liv! Call the police!"
"That bastard!" Liv swore, digging through her bag as onlookers stopped, some lifting their mobiles to begin filming. "Where the fuck is my lipstick you bastard?"
"Get off me!" The guy yelled, bucking against us.
"No chance!" Astrid shook her head, grinning like a loon. "You're going to jail buddy."
"For-ev-ah!" Anika agreed, attempting to straddle his leg more fully to stop him from kicking.
"Well, no," Astrid said. "Our criminal justice system is likely to only give him a few months depending on priors but—"
"Liv! Call the fricken police!" Gabby bellowed, reaching out to help Farrah who was struggling with the perp's arms. "Hurry up!"
Liv dug through her bag, dumping tampons, tissues and a notepad out on the sidewalk. "I can't find my phone!"
She dropped her bag, advancing on the squirming man under us. "Where's my phone, dirtbag! I'm not above using torture to get the info."
"I have one!" Laura held up her cell triumphantly.
"Let me up you bitches!"
"Police! Every body freeze."
We all froze, except for the perp who kept bucking under us.
"What the fuck is going on here?" the officer demanded, staring down at us.
"These bitches are assaulting me!"
"This guy hit my friend and stole my purse!"
Around us the crowd began to yell, the police looking at each other, then down at us.
The older guy, who I'd nicknamed in my head as officer 1, reached for his radio calling it in and asking for backup.
"Alright ladies, back up. All of you, on the curb. Sit there and don't move or I'm putting you in cuffs."
"Sexy," Anika commented in what I think was meant to be a whisper but was loud enough to send us into fits of giggles. We settled on the curb, passing bottles of water between us and examining Farrah's face, all of us fuming at the bruise rising on her cheek.
"Alright, ladies." Officer 2 had returned. "We've had inconsistent recounts of what's happened so we're taking you back to the station to get statements and sort this out."
"What!?"
"Over my dead—"
"We didn't even do anything!"
"Can you get my sister ice first? Her cheek might be broken."