Finley blew out a sigh and leaned away. He felt like an idiot. It wasn’t as if Coby could answer him. He carried the box to the living room, where Coby’s ashes sat on the mantle. He sat the box next to the urn. A folded paper beneath the urn caught Finley’s eye. He pried it from beneath the urn and unfolded the coloring book sheet he had forgotten he placed there. The image wasn’t what stood out, but the note Coby had written for him in the corner did. “You’re irresistible when you smile. Keep doing that shit.”
A snort escaped Finley as he put the drawing inside the box Grayson carved for him. “Message received, Brat. I still miss you, though.” Finley would miss Coby forever, but maybe it was time to let himself have a little happiness. Grayson needed him. Finley couldn’t ignore that. Pretending to be dead hadn’t helped him. He wouldn’t do that anymore.
Grayson lightly held Hoppy’s leash and let the bunny bounce around the backyard. He had never had a pet growing up, so he appreciated Tommy and Kage for letting him watch Hoppy every chance he got. It still scared him a little to be responsible for another life. Grayson wasn’t very good at anything. He wasn’t always sure he could keep anything alive. Thankfully, he was only watching Hoppy until Kage and Tommy came back from taking Benji to deliver his gift. Grayson tried not to think too much about that. There was a real possibility Finley would throw his present in the trash. Grayson tried to prepare himself for anything.
“Jacob called this morning, looking for you.”
Grayson didn’t look Silas’ way at the news. He didn’t want anyone to see how much it hurt, knowing Jacob knew how to get ahold of Silas, but didn’t know his own brother’s number.
When he didn’t respond, Silas pushed on, as if they had a two-way conversation. “He says he’ll pick you up Saturday night for dinner at eight.”
Grayson nodded, letting Silas know he heard. Jacob wouldn’t show. He never showed.
“I told him to meet you around the corner since we’re having a party that night. I don’t want him thinking he could make the guest list.”
A smile tugged at Grayson’s lips. He imagined that stung the hell out of Jacob’s pride. “I imagine that’s why he chose Saturday, hoping he would get an invitation.” God knew it wasn’t because he wanted to see Grayson. Grayson loved his brother, but that love didn’t go both ways. Jacob didn’t love anyone. Of course, Grayson would still wait for him, because he was a dumbass who never stopped hoping someone might love him a little someday.
Silas snorted. “No one sneaks into my parties and someone like him has no business here.”
It warmed Grayson’s chest that he belonged somewhere Jacob didn’t. That warmth bled away as quickly as it hit. Grayson wished he fit in everywhere. He wished he wasn’t different, and that everyone adored him the way they did Jacob. Sometimes he wondered how much more silence he could take before insanity claimed him.
Kage, Tommy, and Benji joined them in the garden. With a smile, Grayson passed Hoppy’s leash to Tommy while Tommy signed his thanks. Grayson fought the urge to immediately ask how things had gone with Finley. He needed to make himself not care. His final apology had been made. There was nothing more he could do to make amends. The apology wasn’t about him. He needed to be okay with that.
Benji touched his arm, leaving him no other choice but to meet Benji’s stare. His light gray eyes looked sincere.
“He seemed really moved by your gift.”
A sad smile pulled at the corners of Grayson’s mouth. “I think I’ll go take a nap.” He couldn’t talk about Finley. Grayson had never been good at expressing his feelings.
Benji nodded and let him go. There was a hint of pity in Benji’s eyes. Grayson had to get away from it. He would always be that sad charity case. The unwanted orphan. All ties had been cut with Finley now. He needed to be alone.
Chapter Five
Silas Dreco’s parties were notorious in certain circles. People outside a specific lifestyle had likely never heard of the man known for using his endless funds for people who lived outside the societal norms. Despite Finley’s deep-seated need to be a caretaker, he didn’t truly fit in at Silas’s. Since that was where Grayson was, Finley pushed aside all discomfort and went. He couldn’t take another day without his wee one.
The large stone wall surrounding Silas’ property hid a sight to behold. After giving his invitation to the guard at the gate, and having it scanned with a black light, Finley was let inside the courtyard of a beautiful four-story home. Men lingered outside, wearing expensive tuxedos or lavish costumes. Sexy, trim men moved from person to person, serving drinks and flirting for tips. Finley only had one goal: to get inside to Grayson.
The doors stood open, allowing light to flow outside and air to flow in. Finley ascended the steps and weaved through the crowd, making his way to the back corner of the ballroom. That was where an area had been designated as a giant playpen for the Littles. Men in nothing but diapers waited to be collected by men who were into that sort of thing. There were a few men in pajamas. Others were dressed like petulant teens. Everyone had their reasons. Still, Finley was there with one purpose. Unfortunately, he didn’t see Grayson. He spotted Benji. Benji noticed him at the same time and met him at the edge of the pen. His light gray eyes flashed with happiness.
“Hey. I didn’t think you’d come.” Before Finley responded, Benji added, “You’re not dressed for the party.”
Finley glanced down at his jeans and t-shirt. “Aye. I really only came for Grayson.”
A line appeared between Benji’s eyebrows. “Grayson isn’t here tonight. He had dinner plans with his brother, which was a big deal because he never sees him.”
Finley tried not to look disappointed while he nodded. “Okay. Well, I guess I’ll head out, then.”
“You don’t have to go. Since you’re already here, you should get a drink or something.” He rubbed Finley’s arm. “It makes me sad to think of you going back to an empty house.”
Benji was sweet to worry about Finley. “It’s fine. I’ll probably binge-watch a show or something. This really isn’t my scene. I’m more of a quiet-night-in type of person.”
Benji slowly nodded. “Oh. Okay. I’m still happy to see you.”
Something warmed in Finley’s chest. He genuinely cared about Benji. Benji was so adorable in his teddy bear pajamas. He was exactly the type to worm his way into Finley’s heart. Finley had a soft spot for people untainted by life. Those were the ones who deserved protection. He leaned over the pen’s edge and hugged Benji. “I’m always happy to see you too.”
After a final squeeze, Finley headed back out. He ignored everyone as he made his way back through the front gate and around the corner to his car. Finley climbed inside with a heavy heart. He had truly hoped to get some time with Grayson. Grayson was under his skin, and Finley missed him. He didn’t like the way things had been left. Finley needed to make things right. He wanted Grayson back in his life.
Finley started the car and moved to pull away from the curb when he noticed a familiar head of blond curls in the path of his headlights. Grayson sat alone on a park bench down the street. It was late and dark. Finley couldn’t leave Grayson there. Not to mention. Grayson was why Finley had shown tonight in the first place. Finley wouldn’t miss his chance to see him. He killed the engine and slipped from the car.