“You look tired, but not well-fed. I’ll rearrange Fenris’s schedule so your preferred meal is nearby.”
“Please don’t. Is there any update on Ashlyn?”
“Don’t worry about that. Focus on feeding.”
“Ashlyn’s been missing for a week now. How long do you think one human can survive on her own in Uttira? She’s running out of time, and so are you. Megan will be home in two weeks and won’t be happy about a missing human.”
Adira gave me a measuring look.
“Let us worry about Megan. Now that you’re feeding, I want you to visit the Roost nightly.”
And there it was.
In the past, I’d gone along with most of Adira and the Council’s demands or tried to find compromises because I’d been raised to respect my elders, and, in general, I disliked conflict. But, I knew the time for compromise was at an end in Adira’s eyes. And mine, too.
“And if I don’t want to?” I asked.
“It would be in your best interest to do so, regardless.”
Her calm, veiled threat speared through my rational thoughts and sent them into a dire spiral.
She would feel what it’s like to be manipulated. She would dance until her feet bled, all the while loving the feel of it. I would feed on her until every shred of every emotion she ever felt belonged to me. She would—
“Are you hungry?”
I blinked at the unexpected question, then noted the crystalline threads of ocean blue that melded with the silver flecks of her irises.
Adira’s gaze never shifted from my face, but I knew she noted every detail about my tense stance, including the way my fingers had curled into fists. Could she guess at the damning direction of my thoughts, though? I hoped not.
Rather than responding, I relaxed my hands and walked away.
In my car, I rested my head against the steering wheel. Adira was no fool, and neither was I. We both knew that my eyes going black in there had nothing to do with my hunger and everything to do with her provoking me. She would probably see it as a sign of growth or improvement or whatever garbage she wanted to tell herself. I knew better, though.
The turbulence of my life was eroding away at all that made me…me.
I was closer than ever to becoming the monster of my nightmares.
Chapter Two
Some of my shaking had eased by the time I pulled around the side of Girderon Academy. Adira would continue to play her games, and I needed to accept that. After all, my not accepting her and Mom’s meddling was what had gotten Ashlyn into trouble.
My priority needed to be finding Ashlyn. I couldn’t allow nasty brownie sparkles, Mom dragging Dad back into our lives, or Adira’s meddling to distract me. Ashlyn had officially been missing for a week. And, as I’d pointed out to Adira, it was far too long for a human to survive alone somewhere in the wilds of Uttira.
I parked in my usual spot and hurried inside. Students already roamed the halls as I made my way toward the pools. Hopefully, I would catch the three druids there since the conversation we needed to have wasn’t one I wanted overheard.
The moment I pushed my way into the pool area, mermaids hissed then dove deep, creating splashes aimed in my direction. I itched with annoyance as I sidestepped the spray. Megan had called them bottom feeders after her journey across Lake Uttira, and I was beginning to understand why. They were completely disagreeable and held grudges over the littlest things. My mind shied away from my time in the water with Eugene and what “little thing” had set the mermaids off.
I stopped short once I entered the bathroom. Rather than finding the druids in the middle of some spell, the space was empty. A sick feeling swirled in my stomach. How long could the druids camp in the middle of winter? More importantly, how long was Adira going to allow it?
Frustrated, I left the pool. The people in the halls were only slightly more pleasant than the mermaids. I didn’t think much of the collective mood, though, until I heard a commotion ahead.
Eras’s voice rang out in Girderon’s imprisoning halls.
“I will find you, and you will pay!”
The crowd shifted enough that I caught a glimpse of Eras’s angry, red face.
“Meals are stolen all the time, Eras. Can you imagine what would happen if we got pissy every time a fisherman gets away?” a mermaid said with a flip of her green-tinted hair.
“It’s not the stolen meal that’s a problem, Miranda. Someone messed with my head, making me forget what they’d taken. If not for Emory asking if I was less angry, I wouldn’t have even known. Someone’s covering something up, and it won’t be long until other people start forgetting things.”
Eras had the crowd’s attention now.
“Druids,” the troll next to me mumbled under his breath.
“Exactly,” Eras said. “There’s an incubus or succubus out there working with druids, and I plan to find out who. If anyone has information to help me do that, I’ll make it worth your time.”
Miranda’s gaze slipped over the crowd and found me. A slow smile spread across her lips and showed her pointed teeth. I steadily met her gaze, doing my best to seem indifferent despite quaking on the inside. I wasn’t stupid enough to think the mermaids hadn’t noticed the use of their bathroom last Monday. Not with the way she was currently looking at me. And while I knew my business with the druids had nothing to do with Eras’s memory wipe, the mermaid wouldn’t. All she knew was that the five of us had used that bathroom together and only four had come out.
Retreating from the crowd, I made my way to my first class and tried not to panic.
I couldn’t stop Miranda from telling Eras what she’d seen. And once he knew, Adira would know soon afterward. I almost hoped for it. How much longer could I keep silent? I wished Adira was the type to actually help. But knowing her, once she found out, she’d try to blackmail me into appropriate succubus behavior in exchange for not telling Megan about what the druids and I had done. I’d rather tell Megan myself.
Only a few seats were occupied when I entered the classroom, including the one next to mine.
“I’m sorry, Fenris. I told her not to do this.”
I didn’t need to clarify who as there was only one person who liked messing with our lives to this level. He didn’t seem to mind the meddling, though, based on his easy grin and shrug.
“I don’t mind the time away from my schedule.”
I knew he meant his pack of females and sighed, doubting very much that they’d be as accepting of the change.
Fenris’s smile slipped, and he leaned toward me, sniffing.
“You smell different. More…”
While he struggled for the right word, heat scalded my cheeks, and I covered my mouth with my fingers. Piepen’s taste still coated my mouth and apparently lingered on my breath despite all the minty gargling.
“It’s not bad,” Fenris said, taking in my flush. “Only different. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Not with me.”
I snorted but kept my fingers in place as I spoke.
“You wouldn’t be saying that if you knew what happened.”
“I look forward to hearing the story.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”