Just paint on that smile again, Zach, and it will be okay. Take a breath and just relax. Breathe in, then out, in, then out. Every breath in is helping put another layer of bricks between the safe side of the love wall and the other side that I can’t go to.
“Zach, are you okay? You look pale and have lost that excited look you had when we first walked in.”
“Sorry Mom, just got lost in a daydream about the renovations” More like a nightmare, I thought to myself. “How about I show you through the downstairs living areas, then we can take a look upstairs at the bedrooms and bathrooms. What do you say?”
I held my arm out for her to take, and the moment she linked her arm in mine, the calmness of a mother’s love warmed my body. I relaxed into her side as we stepped together down the hallway through to the formal lounge room. This was the room where I had visions of me after a long day at work, sitting back in my leather recliner in front of the open fire. I’d watch the flames dance over the wood as it burned. The warmth would spread through the room, enveloping me and seeping into my body, relaxing my muscles. My body would sag back into the cosiness of the chair and I could lose my thoughts gazing out the large bay window facing the front of the property. I would look towards the surrounding open space of the farm, with the beautiful trees that line the drive and the mountains in the distance. A great way to unwind with a glass of red wine and just contemplate the world.
As we studied the room, I explained my visions in broad terms to Mom. I wanted to keep part of my dream as mine for a while until such time as it was completed or I was ready to share it. Mom loved the room and all that I was going to do to bring it to life. The rest of the tour went much the same as I lead her from room to room until we ventured upstairs.
“Wow, look at the size of this master bedroom, it’s huge! Especially for the era the house was built in. And the views from this window to the river and mountains are spectacular! I can imagine what it would look like at night lying in bed looking out to the stars over the mountains. Zach, you could not have found a more perfect home!”
“Thanks Mom, it means a lot to hear you say that. You know, Grant didn’t talk to me for a week when I told him and Luke that I had bought it.”
I jumped a little as Dad’s voice came from behind us unexpectedly. “Your mother is right, Zach. This is a great buy with plenty of potential to bring it back to its prime. Don’t worry about your brother. He is just sulking because he had to realize you don’t need him to hold your hand. I swear he thinks he is the father of this family, frickin’ control freak!”
Mom nearly choked as she burst out laughing at my Dad. “Gee, Mitch, I wonder where he gets that character trait from?”
“Bite that cute little tongue of yours, Sophia,” he said as he strode across the room and wrapped her up in those big manly arms of his. He leant down and placed a very tender kiss on her lips and whispered, “Or will I have to shut that cheeky little mouth for you?” He winked, making her blush.
As much as I love my parents, there were times when I thought, I do not need the vision of you both doing anything else other than kissing and cuddling.
Mom stretched up on her toes to whisper in Dad’s ear as I turned to stare out the window. I didn’t need to share in that private moment.
“Like I said, Zach, the house is structurally sound, and I look forward to seeing what you do with it”. As we stood staring out to the farm sprawling before us, Dad asked me what I planned to do with the worker’s cottage.
“I am going to fix it up first to a neat livable standard, then move in there to live while I work on the house. That way, I can take my time on the house and continue on it at night after work. I won’t have a thirty-minute drive home each night after I finish.”
“Sounds like you have it all thought out, son. I am proud of you and know you’ll do a good job.”
“He had a good teacher, Mitch.” My Mom’s pride showed in her eyes as she looked up into my Dad’s.
“She’s right, Dad, you taught us all so well. Not only about building, but how to be a man. I hope I have lived up to that for you.” In my heart, I didn’t think I had. But it didn’t stop me from desperately wanting to hear it from my father.
“As I said, Zach, I am proud of you and who you are. Just as I am of your brothers and sisters. You have all grown into great people. Your mother and I are excited everyday watching you all embrace life.”
“Thanks Dad, it means a lot,” I whispered as I stood trying to process the emotions created by what he’d said.
“Now enough of this mushy crap. What’s a man got to do around here to get a feed and a cold beer?” Laughter echoed off the bare walls and the moment was gone. Another rare glimpse of Dad’s soft side to store in my memory bank.
The day ended with us in the local steakhouse. We chatted over the house plans and heard about their last trip. Dad wanted to get up to speed on where work projects were up to. He might be retired, but always liked to keep his finger in the pie. The day ended with Mom probing me for gossip on my siblings.
We’d made a pact years ago. Mom got the everyday gossip, but anything serious we kept to ourselves, so the person involved could share it when they were ready. It worked most of the time until Mom hunted for confirmation that one of us was in need of her help. The thing was, she was usually spot on the money. I guess it was part of a mother’s sixth sense, like when you were younger, and she already knew what you’d done wrong.
I would always look back on that day with a smile and the memory of my parent’s love, feeling so at home and safe. As I floated back into the present, I saw the edge of the city and heard the sound of horns above the tail end of Bon Jovi’s “Living on a Prayer”.
Chapter Two
Emily
What is that annoying noise that keeps interrupting my rest in the hammock?
Oh good, it’s stopped. I could feel the warmth of the sun on my body all the way into my muscles. It must’ve been the direction of the sun because I could feel the warmth more from the waist down. There was that noise again, spoiling my relaxation. It was getting louder and the warmth I was feeling now also felt damp. Actually, more than damp - I felt wet. Why do I feel wet but warm? And wait - that noise. Oh, far out that is my alarm clock! Crap, it can’t be morning already! I have only just got into bed. As I tried to rollover and hit the alarm clock to shut off the annoying noise, I felt a little speed hump in my bed. Samuel, oh man. When did he arrive in my bed during the night? I was so exhausted that I didn’t even hear or feel his arrival.
As I tried to sit up and lean over Sammy to silence the alarm, my hand felt the sheet and then my relaxing dream quickly turned to a bad dream. The sheets were all wet and so were my pyjama pants. I felt Sammy and his pyjama bottoms were saturated.
Welcome to Monday morning, Emily. The day has already turned to crap and you haven’t even made it out of bed yet. My poor Sammy. As much as I wanted to scream, my heart just wanted to wrap up my little boy and make him feel safe. Ever since we had to move into this apartment, he had started wetting his bed at night again. The doctor had said it should get better once he adjusted to the change. How long that would take was anyone’s guess.