“I’m going to leave it out in the hall,” Pinky explained. “I’ll take it home with me so I can walk it to the recycling center later.”
Not even a flicker of expression on Toby’s face. “Please go to the end of the hall and make a right. Walk until you see the yellow door. A guide will be waiting for you there with further instructions.” He handed Ashish the receipt.
“Thank—”
“Next!” Toby yelled, as if Ashish had ceased to exist.
“Yep.” Ash tucked the receipt into his pocket, took Sweetie’s soft hand, and led the way to the yellow door.
* * *
The guide, a short blond girl in braids, was waiting for them, just as Toby had said. Ashish could see her ecstatic smile from all the way at the other end of the hall.
“Hi!” she called when they were still roughly twenty feet away. Her voice rang out like a robust bell. “My name is Amy! Welcome to your escape room experience—Sail the Sweetheart Seas!”
“Is she going to yell the whole time?” Dimple asked as they walked closer.
“She should’ve given some of that energy to poor Toby,” Ash muttered, and Sweetie elbowed him in the ribs. But gently, because she was Sweetie.
“This is one of our most romantic themes,” Amy said in a more normal voice once they were close enough. “All the clues in the room have to do with a lasting love that’s meant to be. Just like all of you!” Amy beamed around at them.
“We’re not a couple!” Pinky and Samir chorused, then paused to look at each other suspiciously for a moment before turning back to Amy, whose sparkling smile had frozen on her face.
Ashish chuckled. “Excuse them,” he said. “They’re in deep denial.”
“But you really shouldn’t assume people are couples just because they’re together.” Dimple gave Amy a severe look. “I mean, like they said, Pinky and Samir aren’t. That’s a total microaggression.”
Pinky shot Dimple a grateful look.
“Oh,” Amy said, looking a little upset. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to, um, micro…” She trailed off.
Rishi sighed and put his arm around Dimple.
“It’s fine,” Samir said kindly into the awkward silence. He hated when people—girls, especially—got distraught. It was genetically coded into his DNA or something. “Really.”
“In this instance,” Dimple intoned darkly.
Pinky turned to Ashish. “I’m in denial? Do you want me to hit you with the poster board? Because I will. And I’ll make it hurt. Deny that.” She brandished the giant thing at him, her eyes flashing behind her glasses.
“No violence!” Amy touched the walkie-talkie strapped to her hip, looking alarmed and, Ashish thought, a little like she wanted them all to go away forever. He wondered if she was considering calling for security. He would, if he came across Pinky in the wild. “You’re going to have to leave that out here. Sorry.”
Pinky propped the poster board against the wall. “That’s okay. I’ll pick it up when we’re done.”
Amy’s smile was back in place, more than a touch of relief in it this time. “Great! So, when you go in, just make sure to read the letter in the envelope on the desk to your right. It’ll have instructions and a background story to the room. You have forty-five minutes to find and solve all the clues and escape the room. Please don’t touch anything with a red sticker on it; that means it doesn’t contain a clue. Any questions?”
No one said anything for a moment, and then Samir raised his hand. Ashish was 98 percent sure he was just going to ask a question because he was a Goody Two-shoes who felt like he had to ask a question when someone asked if there were any questions.
Pinky scoffed. “You’re not in elementary school. You can just speak.”
Samir narrowed his eyes at her. “You don’t have to be in elementary school to have manners.”
She squared off with him. “Raising your hand isn’t showing manners; it’s showing you’re a mind-controlled robot who’s wholeheartedly bought into systemic obed—”
“Please,” poor Amy implored, clutching her braids in distress. “Please, just go into the room. It’s really fun.” She looked around at the group, her gaze landing on Sweetie, who probably (and rightly) looked the most sympathetic and sane. “I promise you’ll like it.”
Sweetie patted Amy’s shoulder. “I’m sure we will.” Looking around at the others, she added, “Come on, guys. Let’s get going.”
They all filed in dutifully after her, Ash feeling a silly spark of pride that his girlfriend was so on the ball and put-together.
* * *
The small room they entered, which Amy ceremoniously locked behind them, was dim and LED candle–lit, with an old-fashioned writing desk to the right. The pirate ship theme had extended here, too, with a smaller version of the pirate ship from the front of the facility taking up most of the center space in the room. This ship, though, had a cheesy cardboard cutout of a man and a woman in a passionate embrace on the deck. On the far side of the room was another nondescript, and presumably locked, door.
Dimple sighed. “Look at that.” She pointed to the left, where a large treasure chest was nestled on piles of velvet fabric, with cutout felt lips taped all over it. LED candles surrounded it in a heart shape. “This is just so…”
“Vapid,” Pinky finished.
“Yes.” Dimple nodded approvingly. “Exactly. Vapid.”
“Ashish, why don’t you read the letter?” Rishi gestured to the writing desk, which held a white envelope, like Amy had said it would.
“Good idea.” Ash crossed to the desk and picked up the envelope, on which someone had inscribed, in a flowery calligraphy, My Love. The flap of the envelope was sealed with a burgundy-colored wax seal, which he broke to get to the letter inside. The same flowery writing carried over to the letter, and as Ash opened it, the scent of roses wafted out. “Mm. Immersive. Okay, let’s see.… You guys ready?”
Everyone nodded, some with more enthusiasm than others.
Ashish began to read.
“Dear Armand,
“I am distressed by this voyage, as it has taken me so far away from you, my one true love. My tears mingle with the ocean water below me as I stand on the wind-whipped deck day after day, night after night, wondering if you long for me as I do for you. Father wishes to keep us apart, but I know you’ll come for me one day. If you’re reading this letter, it means you’ve almost found me. Our sweet reunion is so close! Can you feel it in the air?
“To get to me, you must search this room for the clues I have so carefully left behind, that you may find your way to me, my love. Please, won’t you hurry? The clock is ticking.
“Yours evermore,
“Guinevere.”
Dimple snorted, and at the same time, she and Rishi both said, “Wow.” Ashish looked up, surprised that they were in agreement on this, but then he saw their expressions—it was clear Dimple thought the letter was a bunch of fake lovey-dovey corporate crap, while Rishi looked like he wanted to sketch a vignette of the two separated lovers, Armand and Guinevere, to immortalize their love forever. Of course he did. Rishi was a classic romantic.