“Wow, that was quick! You sure you want these?” In a low voice just for me to hear, she said, “We can try others, you know. Take your time. We don’t have to rush.”
“No, it’s okay, Aunty. I like them. Can we get them?” I was so happy with how fast we got my new, cushy shoes. I didn’t want to take them off. I even kept them on while Jillian paid at the register. It wasn’t half as horrible as I’d imagined it would be. And we were done shopping for the day. I finally felt relieved as we left the mall.
But only for a moment. Lunch was a distant memory and my belly began to growl as I slid into the backseat of the car. We still had to go to dinner at a Fancy Restaurant.
* * *
—
We walked into Tacos and Tequila—we voted to have Mexican after all—and I nearly died.
A boy who was seated at one of the tables in a corner with two neatly dressed, oldish white men was the most gorgeous guy I’d ever seen. He looked about sixteen, with clear skin the color of an apple about ten minutes after it had been cut, sort of caramel brown but not so buttery. His curly hair was so perfect that it could have been in a shampoo commercial. He had hazel eyes, pink lips, a button nose, and a smattering of reddish-brown freckles on his high cheekbones. I had never seen anybody so good-looking in real life before. I mean, I’d seen movie stars, and they were attractive, but they were only about half my height in real life so I figured there were lots of things that clever camera angles could simulate, including a cute face.
There were no cameras here. Just the best-looking guy I’d ever seen. And he was tall AF, judging by the length of the legs I saw folded under the table and the length of the arms I saw folded above it.
Then Julie and Aunt Jillian caused me to have a minor heart attack in the middle of the restaurant.
“It’s Nathan and Bill!” Julie nudged Jillian, pointing to the two men and the demigod of a teenager. “Wow, I haven’t seen them in ages! I wonder if they’ve ordered yet.”
We had been walking behind the hostess who had met us at the door. Jillian stopped her and started to explain. “Sí, por supuesto, sure,” the hostess said with a light Latin Canadian accent, smiling as she gestured for us to go on.
Julie waved and led the way forward. I barely noticed the restaurant, which seemed cheerful and bright with colorfully embroidered white tablecloths and centerpieces of low baskets of fresh flowers. There were hellos, long-time-no-sees, and plenty of air-kisses between the adults while the boy and I nodded at each other awkwardly. After Jillian introduced me to the adults, Julie added, “Nathan and Jillian were friends at university. He and Bill are partners in their own law firm downtown.”
“And this young man is Joshua, my son,” Nathan said. I could see the resemblance between them. They were both tall and slim. Both had very symmetrical features, bright hazel eyes, and long eyelashes. But while Nathan was a blond white man, Joshua was clearly black. He must have got his adorable nose, those exquisite cheekbones, and his dark, curly hair from his mom’s side of the family.
“Joshua is also Jillian’s godson, isn’t that right, Jillian?”
Jillian nodded. “Though I haven’t seen him since he was in grade school! He grow up nice, eh, to use a Trini expression.” They all laughed except for Joshua. Was the Cute Boy blushing?
Nathan insisted we join them. They hadn’t ordered anything but drinks, and those hadn’t been served yet; Nathan hailed the hostess and asked for a new pitcher of margaritas and another table for us. We stood in a quiet group as a waiter brought over an extra table, joining them together to make one long rectangle. After fixing our place settings, three to a side, he dashed away. The hostess reappeared and gave us menus once we’d taken our seats, Jillian and Julie and Nathan on one side, Bill and Joshua and me on the other. Rushing back, the waiter brought margaritas for the adults, with four weirdly wide glasses with salt-encrusted rims. Next he came with glasses of ginger ale with ice for me and Joshua. He ran to the front again and got a pitcher of water, too, pouring some for everyone as the hostess oversaw. In Trinidad we don’t tip, not usually; it’s just not something we do. But these two people were working so hard, even I, a Trini, had to admit they were earning a nice one tonight.
The adults helped themselves to their drinks in the odd glasses. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Joshua darting a look at me as he picked up the ginger ale and offered to cheers mine with a shy smile. I didn’t want him to see that my hands were trembling. My voice was shaky too when I croaked, “Oh, thanks.” My throat was a dune in the Kalahari.
I couldn’t believe we were having dinner together, me, next to the most gorgeous boy I’d ever seen in real life. I wished I could call Akilah instantly to discuss the new development of the Cute Boy and the terror I felt, but I knew if I pulled out my phone it would be rude and Jillian and Julie would be disappointed in me. So I ducked my head and tried not to pass out from lack of oxygen.
I should have said steak. It wasn’t as messy as Mexican, and between the guacamole, salsa, and tortilla chips there was all kinds of potential for food falling on my clothes, my clothes that I obviously shouldn’t have worn. My outfit was cool for the mall, but now there was this guy and we were at dinner and I felt I looked like a slob in ripped, baggy jeans and a flannel shirt. I was so scared I’d make a fool of myself and drop the food like a baby. Oh God, and those hideous sneakers! I should have at least put on some ChapStick. My mouth was dry and my lips felt ashy. I was horribly unprepared for the moment. There was a sour, cramped feeling in the pit of my stomach. Imagining how I must have looked to the Cute Boy, I was filled with self-disgust. I lost my appetite, though minutes before I had been hungry enough to eat my own arm.
Jillian looked at me from time to time while she chatted with Nathan and Bill. She made eye contact with Julie, who turned her attention to us. “So, Joshua!” Julie said, beaming.
He blushed. “People call me Josh,” he told her.
“Lovely to meet you, Josh,” she said, before adding to Jillian, “This gorgeous kid is your godson?” She asked Josh directly, “Where has Nathan been hiding you?”
“I live in Brooklyn with my mom,” Josh said. “I’m with my dad on vacations.”
“Oh, so you’ll be here for a few more weeks, then?” He nodded. I swallowed, watching a determined expression settle on Julie’s face. Something told me she was going to try to get us to be friends. She wouldn’t…would she? But I was right about the glint in her eye. She pointed to me. “She’s here for a while, too. Maybe you two can spend some time together,” Julie suggested. I tried to keep breathing but it was a challenge. My throat still wasn’t working that well. I made a grimace that I tried to pass for a smile.
The waiter came back and took our entrée orders. I went last, having the same thing as Julie, chicken mole. I had no idea what it was; I’d never seen Mexican food in Trinidad. But I thought, who doesn’t like chicken? The truth was it was easier to order what someone else had, to just avoid choosing from the menu.