"How?"
"Hell, Maeve." He sucks in a breath and moves close. His energy reaches out for mine, in the way the other guys would reach out to touch me. "Didn't you hear me?"
I shake my head as my breathing shortens and Tobias steps back swearing, breaking the binding as he does. "The magic Anastasia tried to coax from you is powerful. Did you think you resisted on your own?"
"Yes," I whisper.
"Wrong. The Blackwoods want to twist your magic into something else. Blackwood energy flowed through you, triggered by Anastasia. She’s testing you and I threw up a barrier in your mind." He drags a hand through his hair. "You can’t access that magic and allow it to strengthen. The dark magic will consume yours—and you."
I falter and drop my arms. "You stopped me?"
"Yes. I knew as soon as Ruben walked into the room that you were in there. I know what they want. I promised I would protect you and that’s what I did."
"I thought..." I shake my head.
"You thought what?"
His gaze is steady and guilt washes over me. "I thought you took us to the farmhouse last night deliberately. That you knew the Blackwoods would come."
"What the hell?" Anger flashes across his mind. "Do you have that little faith in me?"
How can I say the coincidence was too great? That when I heard Anastasia greet him like an old friend, the shock blew apart that trust? "You're distant, Tobias. However hard I try to get closer to you, however many secrets you tell me, I sense you hold something back. There's a part of you buried—not only the Tobias who killed, but the new one who's an enigma."
“An enigma?” he asks. “And one you don’t trust after everything I’ve told you about myself?”
I moisten my lips. "I do trust you, but then something like this happens and I realise I don’t know you at all."
There's no fathomless expression the way I expected, no stoic response, and I don't hear him either. Instead, Tobias looks at me with hurt clear in his eyes. My stomach churns as the guilt grows. I've struggled not to judge others at the academy, but how can I feel safe when I'm surrounded by secrets and lies with no idea who's telling me which?
"You want to really know me?" he asks in a low voice. "You want me to stop holding back?"
"Yes. Stop hiding who you are."
As he moves closer to me, I can't step back. The magic building around him as his hurt grows intensifies, although we're not touching. Tobias takes a strand of my hair and my scalp buzzes as if he's run his fingers across the skin. "I have told you my history, but I hide myself to protect you, not me."
"Physically, yes, I'm aware of that." His eyes darken as I moisten my lips again. "But the emotionally shut-down man is protecting himself."
His laugh is harsh. "You don't know how wrong you are."
The last time Tobias stood this close with such intensity was the night of the Winter Ball. The time I scared him because I'd unearthed a secret, and both our guards dropped. I swear he almost kissed me that night as we sank into a place that we’ve never found our way back out of.
The same place as now. I'm transfixed by Tobias, even though I don't sense him in my head. He drops my hair and his fingertips gently rest against my cheek. Heat sparks and rushes across my skin and along my body. Tobias's face is close, and his clean scent takes me back to the identical moment at the Winter Ball.
"You want to know who I am?" he whispers, his lips close enough that his breath strokes my skin. "You want to understand my emotions? Open me up? I'm not Andrei."
"I know." I'm a heartbeat away from pressing my mouth against his. "He's an open book compared to you."
"I’m not emotionally shut down, Maeve. I’m avoiding a situation which will lead to consequences for both of us,” he says softly.
“Because you’re my professor?”
The light buzz in my body intensifies as he gently touches my cheek, bemusement on his face. “Do you think something as minor as that would stop me?”
I swallow. “Because you’re dangerous.”
The heat in his gaze intensifies as we stand on the edge we’ve almost fallen from before. “You know I am.”
“But not to me.”
“No.” Tobias slides his hand beneath my hair, palm against the base of my neck, and the simple touch snatches my breath. “But what if kissing you changes everything?”
"I don't care." I trail a finger across his lips, pulse haywire at the idea he might finally put them on mine, but my hope sinks when he takes my wrist and moves my hand away.
His fingers remain curled around my wrist as desire and need on a scale I've never felt broadcasts between us. Neither of us moves as we stand in silent stalemate with lips almost touching.
“I don’t care, Tobias,” I repeat, voice thick.
“I wish you hadn’t said that.” Tobias's grip on my neck grows tighter and he pulls my head towards him until finally his lips meet mine.
Chapter Seven
MAEVE
My head fills with a blinding myriad of colour, the magic buzzing through my brain as if someone electrocuted me. I grasp onto him, desperate for his lips to stay on mine. The euphoria shakes through my body, more encompassing than the time he held me. But there’s something more than the overwhelming physical desire created by his mouth moving softly against mine.
I feel him.
I feel Tobias's anger and sorrow, the pain he buries and the love for me he spends his life fighting. Every single one of these emotions touches me as if I’m experiencing them myself. With each second we’re connected, our minds and bodies meld the way our magical energy does.
I grip Tobias’s hair and our kiss becomes deeper, the arousal growing as he holds me to him. We’re fully clothed but the sensations are as intense as the time he held me before, and now we’re kissing, I’m ready to combust at any second.
Tobias backs towards the door and leans heavily against the wood, not taking his hands or mouth off mine for a moment. The colours in my head intensify and explode around me as I reach out to touch.
His mind is open and images of me from the months he’s known me flash across his mind. His frustration with my behaviour overridden by his desire to reach out to me. The warmth that spread through and confused him when he watched me relax with my friends. I see myself in class, intently listening as I watch him teach, and sense his struggle to stay focused.
I witness the night he wiped my memories when the hunters died, how his panic led to the situation and his guilt over his actions helped keep him away from me.
But his current thoughts are closely guarded.
I tremble as he continues to kiss me, one hand pressed into the small of my back and the other still curled around my neck. The magic flows from his fingers and the touch could be anywhere on my skin, smothering me with arousal and desire.
He holds my shaking body closer to his and the urgency in his passion grows. In my mind, I fall further into the maelstrom where our physical, magical, and emotional selves meld together. Intense pleasure rushes through me as I hit the centre, consumed absolutely by him.