Her voice is animated, and she waves her arms as she speaks. Her hair is tied in a messy bun.
“Make Andy think we’re good little CITs and following the rules,” I say.
“Exactly.”
“What happens if we get caught?”
“We’d be in a lot of trouble, I think. I doubt we’d get kicked out, though.”
I take a breath. “I hope not.”
My mom and dad would be so mad.
“Don’t worry, Esme, we won’t get caught.”
I mean, the chances are high. If someone else is outside, too, they will see us disappear into a bush and not come out for a couple of hours. Maybe they all do it.
We walk along the edge of the oval lake with trees to our left and water to our right. It’s beautiful, peaceful.
In a couple of days, we’re going to be swimming out here. We even have an inflatable obstacle course for the water. We didn’t have that when I was a camper, so I can’t wait to try it. I can get a bit competitive, so I need to remember to play fair with the children.
“Are you going to college after summer?” I ask.
“Yep, in New York. Big change from Oregon. I can’t wait. What about you?”
I nod. “Denver. I’m from Pennsylvania, so a big change for me, too. It’s so pretty in Colorado. I can’t wait to see mountains.”
“We’ll have to keep in touch.”
“Definitely. Is this it?” I ask.
“Yep. Must be.”
Thankfully, the track is just behind the bramble.
Tia and I continue to walk around the lake. It’s dark over here without camp lighting, but the moon is bright, so there’s enough light to see where we’re walking. The scent of pine is stronger away from the cabins and campfire. I breathe it in.
It takes about ten minutes to walk all the way around the lake, probably quicker now that I’m not eight.
“Next week,” I say with a bubble of excitement. This summer is going to rock.
* * *
Back at camp, some of the CITs are down by the lake, while others are playing cards.
“I’m not jumping in the water tonight, I’ve already showered,” Tia says.
“I’m with you,” I say. We take a seat with Kayla, Rebekah, Jake and Olly. They are sitting to the side of the campfire in a little circle.
“Campfire games,” Tia says. “We can play Which One Is the Lie. You have to tell two facts about yourself, but only one can be an actual fact. The rest of us have to guess which one is the lie.”
Rebekah interjects. “I have a better one for y’all, a way for us to really get to know each other. But we have to all agree to be completely honest and no one can judge.”
I’m not sure I like the sound of that.
“I’m game,” Jake says, rubbing his hands together.
Good for him.
Kayla and I share a look. There are some things we won’t ever be telling anyone.
“Come on, it’ll be fun.” Rebekah sits taller if that’s even possible. “It’s something I’ve played before with my best friends. It keeps us close.”
“All right,” I concede. I don’t have to lie to anyone. Kayla and I just won’t tell everything.
Kayla’s eyes snap to mine and I see her body visibly stiffen. We’re obviously not going there. I subtly shake my head, telling her it’s okay.
“I’ll go first,” Rebekah says. “My greatest fear is that I will never be happy. Really, truly happy.”
Her confession knocks the air out of my lungs. “You’ve never been happy?”
She shakes her head, eyes downcast. “I don’t think I know how. Since I was young, I knew there was something wrong with me.”
Well, this got dark fast. I want to ask what she thinks is wrong with her, but her eyes fill with tears and I don’t want to make her cry.
Olly purses his lips like he’s deeply uncomfortable and doesn’t know what to say. Jake clears his throat and looks longingly at the lake as if he wishes he was in it.
He’s not alone.
“You will be happy,” Tia tells Rebekah, giving her shoulder a squeeze, and then quickly moves on. “So, my big confession is that my parents still don’t know I’m gay.” She laughs. “In fact, no one does but you guys.”
“What, no one at all?” I ask.
She shrugs. “I guess being here and being out will give me the kick in the ass I need to live this way back home, too. What’s yours, Esme?”
I clear my throat.
My biggest fear is that someone will find out what I did ten years ago.
3
I wake in the morning in the top bunk with a crick in my neck. The beds aren’t too bad, but the pillows are. Tilting my head from side to side, I kick off the thin blanket and climb down the ladder.
Kayla is still asleep. I don’t want to wake her, so I take my clothes and toiletries and go to the bathroom to get ready.
When I get back to the cabin, I notice how eerily quiet it is this early in the morning. Every bunk bed in the main room is neatly made, blankets and sheets tucked in, ready for the campers tomorrow.
I dump my bag back in our room and shake my head at Kayla’s soft snore. She could sleep in for hours. Getting her beauty rest, she calls it. She doesn’t need it, though; she’s naturally model material. Her Insta following grows with every selfie.
I take the few steps to our dresser and open my drawer. From it, I pull out the pamphlet Kayla and I received a few months earlier asking us to consider positions as CITs. They arrived at our houses on the same day. We assumed most ex-campers received them. I run my hand over the laminated cover. It’s a picture of the lake at sunset, campers jumping off the dock. Inside is a bunch of information—about schedules, pay and benefits. I flip the brochure over and a chill runs down my spine, just like it did the first time I read it.
In big block letters are the words COME TO CAMP PINE LAKE…YOU’LL REGRET IT IF YOU DON’T.
The first time I pointed this out to Kayla, she told me it was nothing. Just cheesy copy. But something about it rubbed me the wrong way. By the time I realized why, Kayla was already in love with the idea of coming back. I agreed to come too, but for different reasons. I had the feeling this pamphlet was a threat. That if I didn’t come back, something bad would happen. Like maybe someone would reveal my and Kayla’s secret.