Kit had looked appropriately nervous but determined too.
Next munch, I wanted to talk to him more. We’d sat together with a few others, but I wouldn’t call him a friend. I didn’t have friends; I had people I knew somewhat, except for Ivy. We met up for coffee in town sometimes.
River and Reese…they had friends. Close friends. Friends they could call family, even. Some of them had strolled over here to say hi and shoot the shit. Only Tops, though. Perhaps there was a rule somewhere that kept submissives and bottoms away, because at most, two had waved from the deck.
Reese said he wanted some privacy for us tonight. Besides, we didn’t know if I was contagious, and maybe they didn’t care—clearly, they didn’t—but others might. So we stayed here, and it was fucking cozy. Despite my being on the floor. The twins shared a wicker sofa, and Reese had fanned out two blankets on the floorboards for me to sit on.
I didn’t mind the subbie treatment, to be honest. Every now and then, I had their fingers in my hair, scratching my scalp, making me purr like a damn cat. Additionally, it gave me the best access to everything on the low table in front of me, and it was quite the spread of fried chicken, mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, and wings.
My hunger had returned with a vengeance.
“Poor Cameron,” Reese chuckled.
“Poor Lucian,” River retorted.
I bit into a piece of fried chicken and scanned the people by the pool. Cameron was also part of the group I sat with at munches. I knew he carried a torch for Master Lucian. I remembered Cam and the others talking about it at a munch this spring.
“Why feel bad for any of them?” I asked.
“Cam just needs to be patient,” River replied quietly. “Lucian will realize the boy’s good for him soon enough, but after that breakup…?” He let out a low whistle. “I can’t blame Lucian for sticking to casual partners.”
“Master Lucian was hurt?” I guessed.
“Understatement,” Reese murmured. “Cameron is a sweet boy, though. If Lucian would open his damn eyes, he’d see that Cam’s perfect for him.”
Oh wow. Did Reese Tenley just come out as a hopeless romantic?
I crammed the last of the fried chicken into my mouth and looked up at him over my shoulder. “Are you a sucker for romance?”
He smiled slightly, grabbed a napkin, and wiped some crumbs off my cheek. “I’m a sucker for happy people. Don’t tell anyone.”
I grinned and chewed quickly so I could say, “Wouldn’t wanna ruin your reputation.”
“Exactly.” He leaned down and kissed me briefly, then reached for his beer and sat back again. “We could invite Lucian and Cam to the group play next week.”
River nodded with a dip of his chin, and I faced forward. Could I ask? It wasn’t my business. I shouldn’t even be curious about what they had planned with other people, much less let it bother me. It didn’t bother me. It didn’t.
I did my best to sound indifferent. “Group play?”
“Mm.” Reese set down his beer bottle on the table. “You know who Macklin is, right?”
“Yes, Sir.” I nodded.
Shit, I hadn’t meant to call him Sir. It slipped out.
Maybe he missed it, though. He didn’t react to it. “He suggested we get together next week for an orgy.”
“Oh, okay. As you do.” I widened my eyes to myself and shook my head.
I wasn’t hungry anymore. My stomach felt unsettled all of a sudden. Fuck, I better not face a round two tonight.
Fingers wove their way into my hair, and then my head was tugged back. It was Reese again.
“You’re joining us.” He tightened his grip on my hair, enough that my scalp stung. Me, joining them for an orgy? I…I didn’t know what to say. Did they want me there? “I don’t know how yet, but you’re staying all week. I just need to find the right way to convince you.”
No way. I’d already pretended long enough. Again, it felt too good. I’d get stuck out here. I’d find more reasons to cave to my stupid longing. I didn’t deserve it.
“I can see the conflict in your eyes.” He dipped down and pressed his lips to my forehead. “We’ll go through with the goddamn fight, if that’s what it takes.”
“Leave him alone, Reese,” River ordered quietly. “Kid knows he can’t beat you. No need to rub it in.”
The fuck?
As Reese released me and leaned back, I turned toward River and tried to remain polite. “You two have been really nice to me, so I don’t wanna be a dick. But don’t pretend to know anything about my background and how I fight. We talked about your specialties before—well, this one’s mine. You don’t see me shitting all over your mindfucking.”
River opened his mouth and took a breath as if he was ready to fire back. Instead, he closed it again and furrowed his brow.
“Who trained you in martial arts?” he asked eventually.
I didn’t like his question one bit. Facing forward once more, I reached for my Coke and closed the topic. “He’s dead, so it doesn’t fucking matter. Can we enjoy the rest of the evening now?”
Five
Reese Tenley
Shay excused himself to go to bed around midnight. His mood made it clear that he didn’t want company.
Fine by me; I had plenty I wanted to discuss with River outside of Shay’s hearing range.
“Where he decides to sleep will say a lot.” I took a swig of my beer.
River lit up a smoke. “He’ll be in our bed.”
I believed so too, and it was further proof that Shay was clinging to a façade where he claimed to be detached and wanted distance, but the act had become transparent and weak. If he actually did want distance, we’d find him in the subbie bed. If he actually wanted to get away from us, he would’ve accepted a ride from just about anyone who’d left the house tonight. If he actually wanted to be punished, he wouldn’t set off any alarms for Sadists.
A person who saw suicide as their only remaining option to escape generally didn’t warn anyone right beforehand.
As my brother had already mentioned, Shay’s behavior was a cry for help.
“I’m gonna go through with the fight tomorrow,” I said. “I think it’ll crack him open.”
Riv inclined his head, and the extra crease in his forehead let me know he was troubled by something.
“We’re gonna minimize the foul play.” I squeezed his leg.
He took a drag from his smoke and tilted his head at me. “How’s that even possible?”
“At the risk of sounding like a fucking child, he started it,” I replied. “He needs to own his part. He’s not only put himself at risk by seeking out unsafe play, he’s completely disregarded the Tops’ safety.” I set down my beer again. “I don’t need to tell you what can happen to a masochist—and a Sadist, for that matter—if we start a session with someone without all the facts.”
He eyed me, waiting, and I stole his smoke to take a quick drag. Unlike my foolish twin, I’d given up smoking.
I returned the cigarette as I exhaled some smoke. “Once he sees that, hopefully he’ll be more inclined to understand our perspective.”