“Wrap it around me.”
He does and I thank him with a kiss on the cheek. “It’s only a couple more blocks, suck it up, sweetheart.” I should feel bad, but I don’t.
The streets are lined with the entire town. Kids are laughing and chasing bubbles, all decked out in our school colors. I blatantly search for Mom, who I have yet to see. I shouldn’t be surprised that she’s not here. She’s the least supportive woman in the history of parenting. She’s no mother to me, she hasn’t been since I was a kid. They say money changes people, and they are right. She’s a gold digger and loves nothing more than to flaunt her lavish lifestyle to anyone who takes notice, degrading those who ignore her victories and pointing out their misfortunes to make herself feel better.
One might say that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree—but I’m nothing like my mother; I’m just well aware that when people know your weakness, they use it against you. My intent is to always have the upper hand and never let the world see me vulnerable. I can feel it, but I must never show it. If I do, they’ll break me, and every single one of them are waiting for that window of opportunity. When the photos began circulating, I could feel the pity from my friends, hear the laughter from my enemies, and I know they were all waiting for me to lose control. Maybe they thought I’d kill Petra and Wyatt. Maybe I should have.
The parade finally ends when we arrive back at the school. I climb out and head to the locker room to change out of my pink satin dress. Petra and I were the only cheerleaders on court, so it’s just my luck that she’s shadowing me. I swing open the door, not even attempting to hold it open for her.
I do my business, completely ignoring her. I throw my curled hair on the top of my head and go to the field.
The stadium lights illuminate the field and the game has already started. I position myself in the center of the cheerleaders and feel like a fool when my eyes scour the bleachers, thinking she may have actually decided to come to our homecoming game and watch me get crowned.
We’re only six minutes into the first quarter, and Levi has already scored our first touchdown.
“Go Ravens!” We all shout and shake our pom poms.
“Booooo.” I hear someone mumble on the bench.
I step closer, and the jackass turns around and looks me square in the eyes.
Jasper.
“What did you just say?” I scowl. “Did you really boo your teammate?”
“Keep cheering, B. It’s what you’re here for.” He turns back to face the game.
This guy shouldn’t even be out there. When you put on a Ravens jersey, you put on a badge of honor, and he’s shaming us while wearing it.
“Coach,” I yell, stepping closer to the field. I want to tell him what a huge mistake he’s making by letting his son play, but I stop myself.
“Back up, princess. Don’t need you getting trampled and messing up that hair of yours.” Jasper laughs.
“Shut the hell up.” I turn back to the squad. I won’t let this guy get to me. He’s a nobody trying to be somebody.
When half time rolls around, my nerves are heightened. We make our way out to the field, and I plaster one of those fake smiles on my face that I borrowed from Petra. She’s glaring at me with determination in her eyes; it's cute that she thinks she's actually going to get crowned queen.
The announcer begins by naming off the court members. “Without further ado, your 2019 homecoming King, Levi Maddox.”
Everyone cheers him on, including myself, as he steps forward and takes the crown.
“And your 2019, homecoming queen…”
My heart drops, I feel like I’m literally going to piss my pants.
“Petra Litton.”
What? No.
This cannot be happening. There has to be some sort of mistake. Petra didn’t win. I won. Petra steps forward and takes her crown and joins Levi’s side. The smile can’t even be faked at this point. Disappointment is written all over my face. Everyone is looking at me, waiting for me to break down. I won’t do it. I won’t give them the satisfaction. I raise my lips and crack a smile as a single tear rolls down my cheek.
We make our way off the field, and I’m crushed. Literally crushed, into a thousand shards of glass. Only I walk away before anyone can see the pieces.
“Better luck at prom,” Petra snarls. “But, don’t hold your breath.” She laughs as she walks over and takes her spot in line. The girls all start the half time routine, but I keep walking past them, unsure of where I’m going.
“Blakely Porter, where do you think you are going?” I turn around, and there she is. Her voice muffled.
“Mom? What are you... I thought you weren’t here.”
“Well, I came to watch my daughter get crowned homecoming queen. But that didn’t happen.”
I fight the urge to breakdown when I remember who I’m talking to. She would never have it if her little princess shed a tear in public.
“You saw what just happened. I just need a minute.”
“No, what you need is to shake it off and get back out there. Collect your composure and hold your head high.”
“Why are you so cold?” I drop my hands to my side. I raise my voice and grab the attention of a couple walking by with their child. “Why can’t you ever be a normal mom and say something encouraging like, it’s ok, sweetie. You’re still a queen to me. No! Instead, you tell me to collect my composure because God knows that the sky would fall if I let the stars see my pain.”
“Calm yourself down, right now, young lady.” She grabs my arm and pulls me away from the crowd. “We will talk about this at home. This is not the time or the place.”
I jerk my arm away, “No, we will not. What’s the point?” I throw my arms up. “There is no point in talking with you about anything. Just go!” I shout. She stands there with a guilt-stricken look on her face, but guilt is not something she ever feels. “Go!” I shout again. She lets out a sigh and walks away slowly, her three-inch heels leaving holes in the grass beneath her.
I run my fingers under my eyes to be sure there is no proof of my current mental state. And I do as I was told, I rejoin my team.
It’s four minutes into the third quarter and we’re up, barely, 21 to 20.
“Lined up T formation... Maddox takes the snap... pitches left to the tailback Burton... it’s a sweep left... Burton stops and is looking downfield... wait a minute... Maddox is streaking down the sidelines... Burton loads up and heaves a Hail Mary to Maddox... Johnson is barreling down at Maddox to intercept... this is gonna be close... Maddox reaches for the ball and is leveled by Johnson... Oh man what a hit... and Maddox is slow to get up... he’s gotta be hurt after a hit like that...”
We all stop mid-cheer and turn to the field while the players kneel, waiting for Levi to make a move, showing that he’s okay. Come on, Levi. Get up. Get up. Knox tears off his helmet and drops it at his side as he kneels down. I know he’s going to blame himself for some unknown reason. If anyone knows how to feel guilt, it’s Knox. He has the biggest heart of anyone I’ve ever known, which is fortunate for me, because every once in a while, I need that reminder that good guys do exist.
Finally, Levi is up, and we all clap at his strength. He’s getting walked off the field, but walking, nonetheless. I run over to his side. “Levi, are you ok?”