So instead, I kissed her neck and rolled off her, pulling her along with me to the bathroom, where I pushed her into the shower ahead of me then got in with her. She was a hissing cat throughout the whole shower, but I wasn’t going to let her out of my sight, not even for a moment. It may have been awhile since we were together, but knowing her, she would have taken off the first chance she got and disappeared. After we got out of the shower and got dressed, I confiscated her key and drove us in her car to the diner down the street from her house.
“I’m going to eat, because it’s stuffed French toast, but I’m not going to enjoy it,” she mutters under her breath, and I throw my head back and laugh. At the noise, her head flies up and her face softens, making my heart clench.
“I haven’t seen you laugh in a long time,” she whispers, studying me from across the table.
Her serious tone sets a pause to my humor. “Tell me about your new job. Are you excited?” I change the subject before taking a bite of my omelet.
“Yes, well, I’m not excited to work the whole summer, but I’m excited to start my career and get settled,” she says to her plate, and I nudge her foot under the table, urging her to give me her eyes.
“I’m proud of you. I know how important graduating was to you, and I know how excited you were to start teaching.”
Her eyes stay locked on mine, and I see the wheels in her head turning as she asks softly, “What’s going on?”
“We’re having breakfast,” I point out, and her eyes narrow.
“You… you…” She throws her hands up in the air. “And then…then I wake up in bed with you…and we…we had sex!” she shouts at the end, sending her eyes flying around the restaurant.
“Baby, calm down.”
“No, no way.” She leans across the table, pointing her fork at me.
Letting out an aggravated breath, I feel my nostrils flare as my eyes roam over her. “Do you know what it’s like to stand in front of something you want, but know you shouldn’t have, to wish you had the ability to turn off your feelings so life for the both of you would be easier?” I ask, and she flinches like I struck her. “No, beautiful, not for the reason you think. You were the best thing to ever happen to me, the one good thing I had in my life.”
“Until you left me,” she says quietly, and a sharp pain shoots through my chest.
“I didn’t want to get you dirty,” I tell her softly, honestly.
“What?” she whispers, but I see the tears in her eyes about to spill over. I don’t want her to cry. Her tears fucking kill me every time.
“Let’s talk about that another time,” I suggest gently.
“Ev—”
“Baby, please, let’s just have breakfast,”
“I don’t know?” She closes her eyes. Reaching across the table, I take her hand and bring it to my mouth, and her eyes open as my lips touch her skin.
“One day, I’ll explain everything.”
“I don’t know what’s going on. I don’t know if I’m strong enough to do this with you.” She swallows, looking conflicted. Even with the struggle she’s feeling, she’s not telling me to fuck off.
“One day at a time. I’ve been fighting this, and I can’t fight it anymore. I miss you. I miss us.”
“Please don’t do this.” Her chin wobbles, and I kiss her fingers again.
“Just breakfast today, this moment today. We’ll think about tomorrow when it gets here.” Watching tears fill her eyes again, I stand and move around to sit next to her then wrap my arm around her shoulders to hold her. “I hate when you cry.”
“I don’t like it much either,” she concedes, sounding miserable, and I smile at her tone.
“Why are you smiling?” She frowns, tilting her head back to look at me.
Leaning in, I whisper into her ear the truth—or part of it. “This morning, I took a trip to heaven. Not too much could piss me off right now.”
“You didn’t just say that.”
“I did.” I kiss her nose then grab my plate from across the table and set it in front of me. “Eat,” I tell her, gaining an eye roll, but she starts to eat and doesn’t pull away.
“What are your plans for the day?” I ask halfway through my omelet.
“I need to run some errands. What are you doing?”
“I need to drive up to Nashville for Jax. I’ll be back around five. Do you want to have dinner?”
“Dinner?” she repeats, looking like she’s never heard of it before.
“Yeah, dinner.” I lean in, licking off a speck of powdered sugar from the side of her mouth.
Clearing her throat when I lean back, she mutters, “Dinner…uh…sounds good.”
“Good, I’ll be by your place around five.”
“Okay,” she agrees, and her eyes drop to my mouth, so I give her what she wants, only this time when I’m finished, her hands are woven into my shirt, holding me closer giving me hope.
*
“Sorry, man.”
“It’s not your fault she’s a fucking bitch,” Julian says, tucking the pictures of his wife I just had the unfortunate job of showing him back into the envelope. He places them in the inside pocket of his suit jacket as I pick my coffee up off the table. “If this goes to court and I need more, can I count on you guys to get me what I need?”
“I’m sure we can work something out.” I detest this part of the job. There is nothing, absolutely nothing, worse than telling someone the person they chose to share their life with isn’t who they thought they were.
“Good, my boy needs better than this shit.” He taps the front of his jacket, where the pictures are. “I know I’m gonna have a war on my hands when I ask for a divorce, and I don’t want that bitch to get anything.”
“Let us know what you need.” I pull out my personal business card and slide it across the table to him. “If something comes up and you can’t reach anyone at the office, use that,” I say, standing and taking my coffee with me.
“Thanks,” he mutters, picking up his coffee and turning his head to look out the window. Pushing the door open and walking out of the restaurant, I head toward my bike and pull my cell out to look at the time. Shoving my cell back in my pocket, I throw one leg over my bike, back out of the space, and head for the office.
“You do the drop-off to Julian?” Jax asks as soon as I step into his office and close the door behind me.
“Yep,” I reply, taking a seat across from him.
“How’d he take the news?”
“He asked if he needed more for court, if we could help him out. I told him we could.”
“He thinks he’ll need more than what you got?” He frowns.
“Not sure. Dude has money, but he’s been married for years. I doubt he has a pre-nup, and he sounded like he wanted full custody of his boy. My guess is he’s gonna hold on to this and see what his lawyer has to say before he makes his play.”
“Christ, I can’t imagine having to sleep next to the woman I knew was fucking around on me, so I could get my kid.” Jax shakes his head and I do the same. “I think we can lay off June’s place. There hasn’t even been chatter about her, and I doubt there will be.”