I pull on my desk, a smile now on my face. I’m hurt; the pain is so deep with the mention of Cheryl and the images of Jewel on the stage without me as her Dom. But even I can recognize a funny situation with my tantrum. “Yeah, it took my mind off everything if just for a second,” I admit.
“Now, I’m going to ask you again. It always goes back to Cheryl, doesn’t it?”
I don’t have to nod. Anton was there with me at every stage of the clusterfuck I called my life with Cheryl Berrins.
“Fuck, it was ten years ago. Don’t you think you’ve punished yourself enough for a situation that wasn’t even your fault? The witch lied to you, then used you, and you’re still taking it out on the one person who doesn’t deserve the blame—you.”
“But I—”
In his mild mannered tone, he raises his hand, only to point his index finger at me. “No, don’t start this with me. It wasn’t your fault.”
“But I—” I begin, and this time, he waves that fucking index finger in my face.
“Maddox, no! It was never your fault. The only thing you did was trust someone you thought you loved.”
I take in a sharp inhale of air. “I did love her,” I bite out.
“I know you did. But now, she continues to hurt you as you let go of someone who most definitely loves your brooding ass.”
I deflect with humor. “Look at you, two swear words in one conversation. I think I’m corrupting you, asshole.”
“Yeah, if you haven’t tainted me with twenty-five years of friendship, I don’t think you can,” he adds, leaving me to my own demons, and Cheryl Berrins is most definitely one of those demons.
Chadwick has all the owners and their girls in the VIP room. It’s relaxed as no one is in the D/s position right now as Cord has Shiloh sitting on his lap. I laugh at the sight of Chadwick playing cards with Eve, Tilly, and Embry. Gio is the lucky bastard with two girls. Greer has some guy I’ve never met sidled up to him, but Greer’s men are one and dones, then he never sees them again. Jared has Kira in a corner, making out with her, and if I were to stare longer than is appropriate, I’d say they are doing more than just kissing. And Gio and Anton are having some philosophical twin type debate about nature versus nurture. No wonder Anton likes me more than his twin.
It’s all of us—Greer, Anton, and myself without a significant other on a normal basis—and witnessing the camaraderie, I sometimes miss the closeness each guy shares with his girl. The large screen television is on the far wall, but it’s only showing the security footage from inside the club, where roughly thirty people are in various stages of play. Some are sitting on the couch as their subs kneel before them. Though anyone can use the main stage at the discretion of the dungeon master, many play throughout the room. Some are more private and a member can request an area with solitude, but some of the more prestigious members have their own private playrooms.
We cater to a variety of people, but our annual dues are anywhere from fifty to one hundred and fifty thousand a year, so it’s mainly the upper class who tend to be a part of the dungeon elite.
My eyes are fixed on the main open area of the club, but I do move around to other cameras to zoom in on the submissives’ lounge. I’m not aware that Anton is behind me until he laughs. “You just can’t help but punish yourself.”
Spinning to face him, I find not just my best friend but Chadwick, too. “Fuck, I don’t need you both ganging up on me tonight. It’s already been shitty enough,” I command, but both men ignore me.
Chadwick turns his attention to Anton. “Did you relay Jay’s message from earlier to him?”
“Um”—I poke his shoulder as he is facing away from me—“him is me, and I’m right fucking here.”
A bemused look creeps onto his face as he stares at my finger that has just touched his shoulder. “Okay, you seem brave tonight, asshole.” His chuckle takes over the whole room. “What are you going to do about the situation? Some other dickhead is coming to play with your girl on your turf. So I’ll ask you again, what the hell are you going to do about it?”
As if this had been written for a television studio, my focus turns to Jewel just as the prick Danner escorts her to the lounge and places a soft kiss on her forehead.
“So that’s your girl. What the fuck are you going to do about it?” Chadwick asks again.
My attention stays on Jewel’s long blond hair as she walks away, along with her ass in one of the shortest skirts I’ve ever seen on a woman.
“She’s not mine, motherfucker, and stop telling me she is because it’s the furthest thing from the truth.”
Chapter Eight
Jewel
I’d asked Drake what he’d like me to wear, and when he demanded my skimpiest number, I’d readied myself for something big. I’ve seen it before with new pairings within this club; they normally play on the main stage.
I’ve only been with Maddox since coming to this club as I educated myself further about being a submissive. I’ve been asked here and there to play, but once Maddox had his way with me, I never could entertain another, not until today.
I have two club outfits, a more modest one-piece dress with fishnet stockings and then a bustier that shows my stomach with a pair of leather bootie shorts. It’s nothing compared to the other subs in the club, but I’m learning to let go. Tonight will be the ultimate test.
I emerge from the changing room ten minutes later to find Drake waiting for me with a collar in his hand. I approach him and instantly bow when he tips my chin to his face. “Will you be mine tonight, my beautiful little girl?”
“Yes, Sir.” He reaches for my fingers and pulls me up, bringing me flush to his body.
“Would you like to play with me for all to see?”
And I answer with a decisive, “Yes, Sir.”
We’re in the main part of the club off to the side of the stage. “It’s very tame tonight, my pet. Just a little time on the St. Andrew’s cross? Okay?”
“Yes, Sir,” I reply.
“We won’t go into anything fancy, but be sure to use red as your safe word. Yellow if it gets to be close to too much, got it?”
Kneeling, I’m taking in his instruction and his commands and feel a peacefulness. I love to be pushed, but again, this is all on my terms and no one else’s. I choose to follow Drake. I have the control.
“By the way, have I told you how beautiful you look in your short as fuck outfit?”
“No, Sir.”
He pulls me close to him again, not only his lips near my ear but his tongue, too.
“You are the sexiest thing I’ve seen—ever.” He goes from such a demanding man to almost overly sweet. It’s so much, but there’s something about him I do like.
I look away because I’ve been taught to be humble. “Thank you, Sir.”
“Listen, don’t move your face from my view. It’s what I want to see.”
I instantly readjust my gaze. “I’m sorry, Sir. It’s hard for me to take compliments and praise.”