At one point in the middle of the night, I have to get up to pee, and when I come back, Grayson has moved, rolling nearly to the middle of the bed. I snort and take his spot, falling asleep again almost immediately.
I wake up to the sound almost like moan.
Opening my eyes, I’m not even surprised to find Derek draped over Grayson’s chest, his head buried in my husband’s throat. Grayson’s eyes are open, and I know him well enough to read the question in his eyes. Can I?
I nod quickly. Just in case he misses that obvious answer, I mouth, Do it. I bite my lip. Fuck him.
Grayson searches my face, but seems content with what he finds there. I’m being perfectly honest in what I want right now. No games. No tricks. My husband wants Derek, and I want Grayson to have him.
He finally gives a brief smile and then focuses on the sleeping man on his chest. Grayson feathers his fingers through Derek’s hair and strokes the man’s arm with his other hand. Derek groans and his hips thrust forward. He opens his eyes, sees me, and goes still.
Grayson doesn’t give him a chance to think too hard about anything. He cups his friend’s face and kisses him. Derek almost seems like he might resist, but then he moans and his hands are on Grayson’s body.
I bite my lip as I watch them. They’re making out and thrusting and I can’t help but reach over and tug the blankets down so I can see how they’re grinding their cocks against each other. It’s almost a frenzy, moans and grunts and the sound of skin against skin.
Desire surges and I slip my hand between my thighs to stroke my clit. Will they come from this alone, spurting onto each other’s stomachs, mixing their semen like that? God, I hope so.
Grayson digs his fingers into Derek’s hair and pulls his head back so he can slip down and kiss his neck. Derek looks at me with glazed eyes. “We’re leaving Emma out.”
“I’m enjoying the show.” I sound nearly as breathy as he does.
I didn’t understand before, not truly. I was selfish enough to take the gift Grayson offered without thinking about what he got out of it. Now I get it. They’re beautiful together. Sexy as shit. And knowing they’re fulfilling a need that’s been burning between them for years? It just makes it hotter. I don’t feel a flicker of jealousy at the thought of Grayson and Derek having sex. Not even a little bit.
Now Grayson’s looking at me, too, something wicked lurking in the curve of his lips. “Come here, baby.”
I almost protest so they’ll keep going without me, but something about the way Derek seems to be holding his breath has me moving closer. He’s the one who grabs me around the hips and lets himself flop off Grayson’s chest, hauling me with him so that I’m sprawled across both men.
Using me as a buffer again.
He kisses me before I can call him on it. I tense, but Grayson runs his hands over my body, shifting so that I lay between them. He’s kissing my neck even as Derek takes my mouth, their hands tangling up on my body. Because as much as they’re enjoying this, they really want to be fucking each other right now.
I pull away and sit up. It takes some maneuvering to turn around to face them, mostly because I keep having to smack their hands away. “Hold on. I can’t think when you’re touching me.”
“Now isn’t the time for thinking.”
I frown at my husband. He’s been spearheading this thing the whole time and then he kissed Derek again this morning, and now he’s going to put on the brakes and toss me to his best friend like a runner’s-up prize? I don’t think so.
It’s not even about my pride. Grayson has been more than generous in giving me everything I’ve ever asked for, and more than a few things I haven’t had the courage to put into voice until he prodded the truth from me. His attraction to Derek falls into the latter category for him. He can’t admit it, and if left to his own devices, he’ll keep me between them for the entirety of this last twenty-four hours.
I don’t know why he’s holding back, either. He’s had boyfriends in the past before we got together. Derek has as well. Is it because he doesn’t want to lose the friendship?
That ship has long since sailed. It left the harbor right around the first time I came all over Derek’s face. We’ve gone too far to go back. There’s only forward.
I run my hands up both their chests. “Derek’s gift is covered.”
Grayson narrows his eyes, already sensing a trap. “Uh huh.”
“I want my gift.”
Derek laughs. “Fucking both of us isn’t good enough for you, Emma?”
“Having sex with me is your gift.” I trail my hands back down their chest to their stomachs. They’re so different and both so sexy. I almost pause, but I’ve never been that good at impulse control. I wrap my hands around each of their cocks and give them a slow stroke. “Please, Grayson. I promise you’ll like it.”
He gives me an indulgent smile that’s only a little tight around the edges. “Anything for you, Emma.”
“No matter what it is?” I squeeze his cock, making him clench his jaw. “Promise?”
“No matter what it is,” he grits out.
I turn my attention to Derek. “Can you promise me the same?” I grip his cock and rub my thumb over the slit, smearing the drop of moisture I find there. “Please, Derek.”
He huffs out a breath, but not like he’s happy. “Yeah, Emma. Whatever you want.”
Gotcha.
I give both their cocks one last stroke, debating how far to push this. They just need enough of a nudge to get there on their own. I bite my bottom lip. “I want to ride your face while Grayson sucks your cock.”
Derek tenses, very carefully not looking at Grayson. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.”
Oh, this is ridiculous. I release them and sit back. “Give me one good reason you two shouldn’t fuck? It’s silly to keep me between you when you obviously want each other, too.”
Grayson sighs. “We’re friends.”
“And?” I wait, but no other answer seems forthcoming. “Are we not friends, Derek?” A little sliver of hurt escapes in my tone. Obviously, Derek and I were never as close as he and Grayson, and there was the sexual tension neither one of us could get rid of, but… I thought we were friends.
“Of course we are.”
The coiling thing in my chest relaxes a little. “We’ve already crossed so many lines together. Things are going to change no matter what. Why not cross a few more?”
Derek finally looks at Grayson, so I do, too. The sheer longing on my husband’s face nearly knocks me on my ass. The only other person I’ve ever seen him look at like that is me. It just confirms that this is the right decision. He wants Derek. I mean for Grayson to have him.
Derek clears his throat. “If you’re sure.”
I don’t know if he’s talking to me or my husband, but Grayson is the one who answers. “I’m sure. Our friendship has gone through some shit. This won’t break it.”
I find myself holding my breath as they lean in and kiss, a messy tangling of tongues that has them both moaning a little. Derek breaks the kiss with a curse. “Get up here, Emma.” He doesn’t wait for me to move, just loops me around the waist and lifts me up to straddle his face as if I weigh nothing at all. His breath ghosts against my clit. “Sore?”