Chapter Twelve
Cherry
“I put in the order wrong for table seven. You want it?” Minnie places a cheeseburger with fries down onto the table where I’m currently taking my break. She and I have quickly formed a friendship since she gave me this job. I know her better than she thinks I do. I’m onto her. She didn’t mess up any order; she just wants to feed me.
In the short time I’ve known her I know not to bother arguing with her. Plus, I am hungry. I was planning on eating when I got home. I’ve been trying to save money and eat some cereal but the burger smells so freaking good. I can’t resist her charity tonight. I’ll find some way to pay her back.
“I’d love it.” I close my small laptop, pushing it aside. Minnie sits down with me. It’s late and only a few tables are taken. These days are long and while I’m grateful for this job, it makes me realize how important it is for me to focus on my schooling. I need to make sure that I’m able to provide for my little one.
“Watching your man?” She smiles at me, stealing a fry off my plate.
“Maybe.” I feel my face warm. I think I’m turning into a stalker. I watch all the videos that end up on YouTube or ones they put up on the Instagram live. I am so happy for them. Their dreams are coming true. I am happy to have a way to still see them perform. I miss seeing it live. I miss seeing Linc in the flesh. These videos are the only glimpses I get into his life these days. God, I miss how things used to be so much. The hole in my chest only keeps growing.
“You know Benny and I were high school sweethearts.” Ben and Minnie have been married for a few decades. They own the small diner that sits a few miles outside of town. It’s a mix of our town and the next one over. It’s nice that I don't know every person that walks in the front door.
Word about Linc is starting to spread. They are already making a name for themselves and everyone has been giving me sympathy looks as though I’ve been dumped. I hear the whispers too. I ignore them but at night when I lie in bed I can’t help but hear them loud and clear. Even though I know they aren’t true, the distance between Linc and me has taken a toll on me.
“I did know that.” They are utterly adorable. He’s always got his eyes on her even from the kitchen. It often reminds me of Linc. It’s how I pictured he’d still look at me after all those years. My heart grows heavier, wondering if we’ll make it that far. He hasn't been gone long and I’m already questioning everything. It doesn’t help that I’m keeping this secret from him.
I still haven't gotten up the courage to tell him I’m pregnant. Nick told me Linc is already struggling. If I told him about the baby he’d come running back here. It’s not as though the baby is here yet. I haven't even gone to the doctor. I am trying to find one that’s not in our town. Linc needs to focus on what he’s doing. Being here hovering over me because I’m knocked up isn't going to do anything but lose him the opportunity of a lifetime. It’s not something I’m willing to let happen. I don’t know what my plan actually is, but I’ve got some time to figure it out.
“If you love each other it will work out.”
“I don’t think love will ever be our problem.”
“Yeah, but sometimes we get in the way of ourselves. You should take this time to grow into yourself. We all gotta do a little growing on our own.” She pops the fry into her mouth, standing from the booth. “It’s going to be okay.” I really must be wearing all my emotions on my sleeve. “We’re slow so if you want to head out after you eat, have at it.”
“Thanks,” I say as she heads back toward another table to check on them. I think over what she said. I’m not sure I agree with her. Why do we have to grow alone sometimes? I’ve always been alone until Linc came into my life. He has shown me what it means to be loved and cherished. I’ve gone so long without having that from my parents. I place my hand on my belly for a moment. Silently telling my little one that no matter what happens, they’ll always be loved. I will be a better mom than mine ever was.
I eat my cheeseburger and fries before I pack up my stuff and see to anything else I can do before I leave. The tips have been good here so far. My phone rings as I head out to my car.
“Hey.” I drop my stuff into the passenger seat.
“Cherry.” Linc breathes into the phone. He should be having the time of his life right now, but Nick is right. Linc doesn't sound like himself. He sounds tired.
“I love you.”
“Never gets old hearing you say that. I love you too, Cherry.” It never gets old hearing him say it either. He’s the only person that’s ever said those words to me.
“Don’t you have a show you should be getting ready for?”
“I suppose. I just needed to hear your voice first. What are you doing?”
“I ate a cheeseburger and now I’m heading home.” It was the truth. I haven't told him about the new job. He would try and send me money or worry more over me. It's weird keeping things from him. Another reminder that things are changing.
“I’ve got to come home soon and see you.”
“Don’t worry about me. I’m fine,” I try to reassure him.
“You might be but I’m fucking not.” It would be a lie if I didn't admit that a part of me likes that he is missing me so much. But I love him and will always do what I think is right for him. I know he’d do the same for me.
“We’ll see each other soon. I promise.”
“I’m going to call you when I’m done. We might be thousands of miles apart but we can still go to bed together.”
“I’ll wait up for you. FaceTime me and I’ll have a surprise for you.”
“Oh fuck, Cherry.” He groans into the phone. I knew that would perk him up. It doesn’t change the fact that I’m hiding a bigger surprise from him.
Chapter Thirteen
Linc
“Great set. Great, great set.” Treats beams as we exit the stage. Someone, I don’t know who because our entourage has grown larger in the last couple of weeks and I can’t keep track of everyone, throws me a towel. I wipe off a bucket of sweat and drape the towel around my neck.
“Excuse me,” says a roadie. His hands are full with two mic stands in each hand and a bass guitar around his neck. I jump out of the way and narrowly avoid getting mowed down by a stream of other staff members moving equipment for the next band--Three Fingers Up--to take the stage. I’d forgotten there was one more band after us. We’ve been moving up in the set list at the gigs we’ve played. For the first week, we were stuck in the middle of a show as filler, but the crowds are loud for us and a few acts have had some trouble maintaining the same energy so now we’re near the end. We aren’t close to being headliners of any event, but being second or third to the last before a huge name is damn good.
I should be flying high but I’m in this weird state of being exhausted and wired at the same time. The crowd noise boosts me up but the high never lasts. One minute, you’re the king on stage and the next, you’re just a body that needs to be moved out of the way.