Zayde rolls his eyes. “I don’t give a damn. You know I don’t give a shit about that club.”
I nod my head slowly. Zayde always tells me this, but I can’t help but think he just says it for my benefit. I think he really does love the club or at least the idea of it but he knows that it isn’t a place for me. I love him so much more for always looking out for me. For taking care of me when no one else does, but I’m not his responsibility and I worry that in the end he’ll hate me for it. I don’t want him to always put me first. He deserves his own happiness. I sigh because I know what I’m about to do. “I know that you don’t but it’ll probably keep dad off our backs for a bit so let’s go.” I stand up and start to walk away.
“Zo, where are you going?” Zayde asks, as he comes up behind me.
I look over my shoulder and plaster the smile on my face. “To the bonfire.”
By the time we make it to the beach, the sun is already starting to set. Zayde is going on and on about some girl at school that he is wanting to ask out but never will. Even though Zayde has the “cool card” because of the Sons of Sin, he is also a bit of a nerd and shy. I see a boy in a pair of denim jeans, rolled up to his ankles, his bare feet in the sand, walking towards us. His head is down but I can already tell he’s not from around here. His plaid button up shirt is open and a white shirt underneath makes the tan of his skin stand out. His sandy blonde hair is actually a really pretty shade. I’m usually not one to find light colored hair attractive but on him it seems to work. Zayde notices him as we pass, he speaks to him. When the boy replies there’s a twang to his speech, definitely not from around here.
I figured he’d be a good distraction for the night so I drag him along with Zayde and I to the bonfire. However, I quickly learned he would be much more than a distraction. When Drake’s piercing blue eyes bore into mine it was like he could see every crack and nook in my soul, but he never judged. The night drug on and the excitement fluttering in my stomach only grew stronger. When I shivered from the chill of the air coming off the ocean waves, Drake wrapped an arm around my shoulder and rubbed up and down my arm to warm me up. No one had ever done that before. My heart beat erratically and I couldn’t wash away the sense of calm that came over me while the excitement still fluttered in my stomach. For the first time in my life, I was looking forward to something, no someone. I was looking forward to Drake, learning about him, being around him and seeing where this could possibly go.
That night when I got back to my room I laid in bed, staring at the ceiling with my mind dreaming up fairy tale like scenarios. All of which Drake starred in. The excitement wouldn’t leave my body even when I tried to sleep.
I remember that excitement lasting for about two weeks until my dad reminded me and told Drake about all of my flaws, and how I would always be a worthless whore just because my mom was one. I remember lying in bed that night and crying myself to sleep because I knew I didn’t live in a fairy tale, and I knew that Drake would never actually be my prince charming. He deserved a princess and that wasn’t me.
I sigh to myself. I didn’t know I could ever feel excitement like this again, but now that I do, I don’t want to let it go. I hear a phone start to ring so I get out of the bed and open the door. I can hear it coming from the main part of the club house. I don’t know if I should answer it or not, and that’s if I can even find it.
The phone continues to ring and I try to follow the sound of it until I finally locate a cordless phone sitting behind the bar. I laugh to myself because I find it odd to see a landline phone sitting here. I grab the phone and answer it, but in a flash the dread fills me because what if it’s Gregg?
Fourteen
Zoey
“Zoey,” a familiar voice comes through the line, and I find myself instantly relaxing, leaning back against the bar counter.
“Yeah, what’s up, Wilder?”
He sighs heavily. “Look, I don’t know who else to call right now. The rest of the club is still gone, Drake’s phone is dead and I need some help.”
I straighten back up because clearly something is on his mind. “Okay, what do you need help with?”
“So, Drake fell at work today, after lunch and hurt his ankle. It’s not serious, just a bad sprain, but they gave him some pain medication in his IV and he’s out of it. The only ride I have is his truck. Would you be willing to meet me at his parent’s place and give me a ride back to the clubhouse?” He explains in one big breath.
I have to bite back the laugh that threatens to come out. “Of course, I’ll pick you up. His parents still live in the same place?”
“Yes, same place. I’m fixing to head that way now,” he tells me, and I hear the sound of an engine starting up.
“See you there,” I tell him, before I hang up the phone and jog back to the room where I slip on a red and black plaid shirt over my black tank top and trade my sleep shorts for a pair of denim cutoffs. Slipping on a pair of my black Converse, I head out the door to my car. The nerves that consume my body on the drive to Axell and Sadie’s house almost make me want to turn back around and leave Wilder stranded. I won’t do that, but a huge part of me wants to. Axell and Sadie treated me as if I was their own back in the day. Then I left without saying goodbye or even a thank you for their kindness. I can’t expect them to be happy to see me now.
Looking back, I know why I left and I stand by that decision, but I could have left in a better way. I could have owned up to my decision and at least told the people that I did care about that I was leaving. I guess a part of me was never really sure if leaving was the right decision, but if one of those people had asked me to stay, I would have broken.
I take a deep breath to calm my erratic heart and pull up behind Drake’s truck parked along the sidewalk of the familiar house. The only house that truly felt like home for me back in the day. It was my safe haven and everything I dreamed of. Sure, the James’ didn’t have much, but they were rich in other ways. They loved and cared for one another unconditionally and that was something I yearned for. I wasn’t sure it even existed outside of books and movies-- until I met them.
I hop out of the car and pull my hair into a messy bun before approaching Drake’s truck. Just as I reach the driver’s side door where Wilder is sitting, the front door of the house swings open and Axell James comes striding towards us. Axell is the oldest of the James brothers. He’s tall with their signature dark brown, nearly black hair, only he wears his slightly longer and slicked back. He has a few tattoos peeking out from his shirt and stubble covers his jaw. He opens the passenger side door. “Man, they knocked him on his ass,” Axell says with a laugh.
Wilder nods. “Yeah, you know he barely even takes a Tylenol when he needs it so it’s not shocking this took him down.” Wilder climbs out of the truck and smiles at me. “Thanks for coming to save me,” he tells me, with a chuckle. “Let me just help Axell get Drake settled and then we can go.”
I nod, my voice lost in my dry throat. I look down at the ground to gather my bearings while trying to decide if I should follow them inside or just go back to the car. Turning back towards my car, my decision is made. I’ll just wait for Wilder. I don’t belong here anymore. However, when I turn around, Sadie is standing there, leaning against the side of the truck. Her sundress hugs her body and her hair falls down in loose waves. Her bright blue eyes meet mine and she smiles. “I know you weren’t even considering waiting in that damn car.”