"Can I get three pollo tacos," Sophia ordered, and I knew I was next. Ten years at the same place meant I never had to look at the menu.
The server looked at me with his big brown eyes, and I said, "The combo," as Easton said from my other side, "I'll have the same."
We hadn't ordered differently at a restaurant in over five years now. Easton tried to do his own thing for those first few years but found he always liked whatever I had ordered better. Now he knew to copy my order, and he usually also got whatever was left over on my plate as well. It was a system that served us flawlessly.
"So what big bad thing did you do to scare the world into watching your channel this week?" Sophia teased as she leaned around me to ask Easton her question. Sophia and Easton had always been like oil and water in most ways, but when it counted, they loved each other. They also teased each another like no one's business. I would’ve cried if Easton spoke to me the way he spoke to Sophia, but Sophia just egged it on by throwing it right back at the guy.
"We created the world's longest slip and slide," Easton said with a grin.
I cocked my head in question because that seemed pretty tame for Easton's channel.
"That ended with us going over the ledge of a cliff," Easton added, and Sophia nodded. There was the Easton catch we'd been looking for. If Easton wasn't risking his life, it wasn't enough.
The first few years of his channel, I hadn't been able to sleep well for fear that something would happen to the man I loved. But I’d come to realize over time that if Easton stopped his death defying stunts for anyone other than himself, he wouldn't be Easton. Easton craved danger, and I loved that about him. He pushed me to my limits, and I needed that. So I couldn't pick and choose when Easton was true to Easton and when he wasn't. If I wanted to love the man, I had to love all of him. It was just too bad he'd never know that.
"And I'm sure you found a whole bunch of brainless followers to ride right off of that cliff with you," Sophia said with a healthy dose of sass.
"You know it."
Sophia laughed and then turned away to talk to Whit who was on her other side. The rest of our group fell into quiet conversation, and I was left alone with Easton. Exactly where I loved to be.
"How high was the cliff?" I asked, and Easton laughed at the seriousness of my voice. I didn't want to be a downer in his life, but I had to worry. Even if I'd never stop Easton from what he did, I would always worry because I cared.
"Not too high, I promise. Although the drone angles we caught make it seem pretty dang incredible," Easton said as he put his arm around me and rubbed my shoulder softly. I knew the action was one of pure comfort, but I couldn't help the way my heartbeat ratcheted up in speed.
"I know you worry about me. And I love you for it, Josie." Easton said the word love so easily, I knew he didn't mean it in the way I would’ve meant it if I said it.
I nodded because my runaway thoughts had me discombobulated, and I knew I had to focus. Easton could never know what his touch did to me. What his love, even in the nonromantic way he felt it, meant to me.
"And with that I have some news." He leaned close to my ear to whisper.
I fought against the shivers that ran up and down my spine at the nearness of his voice and the sweet caress of his breath against my ear and neck. This loving-a-guy-who-didn't-love-me-back thing might be the way I would leave this earth. But man was it a way to go.
"I'm retiring," Easton said, and I pulled back so that I could face him.
My action had done little to make space between the two of us. Our faces were so close, our lips mere centimeters apart. I could count the flecks of gold in Easton's green eyes from this place. Drink in the musky, clean scent I would forever associate with the man. I pulled back again, further this time because who knew what I'd be tempted to do at that close of a proximity to Easton.
It took a few seconds for me to remember why I'd turned to Easton in the first place, but it all came back quickly. "Retiring?" I said as softly as I could because I knew he'd been whispering for a reason.
He nodded.
"I think I've defied death enough times now. I'm ready to slow down, maybe even plant some roots," Easton said.
I tried to school my features, but judging by the huge grin on Easton's face, I hadn't done a good job.
Those were words I'd been longing to hear Easton utter for years. Easton had been traveling the globe for so long, I'd wondered if he'd ever want to stop. I knew he craved adventure, so it didn't seem likely. He had been so serious about his career, it was like he didn't have space to be serious about anything else. But did this change mean his priorities were shifting? Could a change in his career also mean he would consider being serious about a woman in his life? Maybe without his career being front and center in everything that he did, he would finally see me? He would finally love me?
I tried to keep the hope from growing too much in my chest. I'd come to accept the fact that I would just be Easton's best friend. That role was better than almost any other in his life. But now ...
"You know how I've said that it stinks that I have to go so far to experience the things I experience?" Easton asked, and I nodded.
That had been another time I'd allowed hope to grow in my heart, only to be crushed when I’d realized Easton's words had been a far off wish for the future. But now were they more than a wish?
"I want to create a place here, in Saratoga, for adventure experiences. Land here is relatively cheap, especially compared to Nashville, but we're close enough that we can use their residents and tourists as my market. We're going to build some of my ultimate stunts. The waterslide off the cliff, the bungee jumping, the four wheeling. I've already started talking to an architect who specializes in this kind of stuff. He's drawn up some sick designs, and because I've saved most of what I've earned from my channel, money won't be an issue."
I felt my eyes widen with admiration—there was literally nothing Easton couldn't do—as a smile took over my face.
"It sounds incredible," I said.
"Really?" Easton asked, allowing a quality I almost never saw from Easton inch over his features. Vulnerability.
"Really," I said with a surety. It did. And I had no doubt Easton would be a success once again.
"Thanks, Josie," Easton said, pulling my hands into his and holding on tight.
I willed my smile to remain friendly, hoping my face wouldn't show the yearning I felt with this kind of touch.
"When I told Priscilla, she was a harder sell, so it's nice to hear someone back me fully right out of the gate. Then again, I am changing the whole way she's making a living," Easton said.
Hearing the name Priscilla was like a cup of ice water over my emotions. I took my hands back from Easton as I struggled not to let him see the hurt I felt that he'd talked to Priscilla about this life change before he'd spoken to me. I had never really been jealous of the girls Easton dated—I knew they never lasted long—but Priscilla was a different story. I knew Easton considered me his best friend, but Priscilla had been in his life longer than I had, and now she worked for him. It had been bound to bring them closer, and I hated that. Because it was easy to see that Priscilla also adored the guy I loved.