‘What happened to there being no evidence to find?’
‘My mind’s all over the place. There’s bound to be something. It’s only a matter of time until they turn up.’
Sue nodded twice, her tone rising in pitch. ‘Okay, that’s fine, if it happens, it happens. It may even be to our advantage. All you’d have to say is that you parked the car in the street after work, just like you always do. And you’ve spent the hours since with the baby and me. As far as you were concerned, your car was sitting outside like it does every night. You hadn’t given it a second’s thought. Why would you? Today was no different from any other day. Just feign surprise if they turn up before morning. Force a few tears if you can. Play the victim. There’s nothing to worry about. I’ll back up everything you say, word for word, that’s a promise. Why would they suspect anything? It’s just a car theft that went horribly wrong. It’s not unusual for thieves to burn out cars they’ve nicked. I’ve seen it on the Welsh news loads of times. And if the car’s been involved in a fatal accident, well, that’s even more reason for the thief to destroy it.’
‘And if they don’t turn up tonight?’
‘Oh, come on, Beth, get a grip, girl. You’re making this seem a lot more complicated than it needs to be. Are you working in the morning?’
Beth switched on the shower, adjusting the temperature, not too hot, not too cold, with a hand that was still trembling. ‘I’m supposed to be in the café by ten.’
‘Okay, so if the police don’t turn up tonight, you go out into the street tomorrow morning, you pretend to be looking for the car, making it obvious, and then you ring to report it missing when you can’t find it. Some bastard must have stolen it. Like I said before. That’s all you’d have to say. We’re not short of thieving scumbags in the area. It’s no different to anywhere else. Just act as if you’re totally gutted. You can manage that. Are we agreed? Please tell me you understand. You’re not usually this indecisive. How many times do I need to repeat myself?’
Beth closed the shower’s glass door, taking sensual pleasure in the water warming her skin. She paused and then smiled without parting her lips. ‘Yeah, I’ve got it, either way, it’s going to be fine. Thanks, Sue, you’re a lifesaver.’
Sue’s face suddenly paled. Her entire body tensing as her child began to cry. ‘The keys, what about the frigging car keys? Please tell me you didn’t leave them in the car.’
Beth spoke above the volume of the flowing water as she massaged floral-scented shampoo into her mousey, shoulder-length hair. ‘You can relax, they’re in my jeans. I thought I was supposed to be the paranoid one.’
Sue’s relief was evident as she picked up Beth’s wet clothing, shaking the jeans, reassured by the distinctive metal jingle. ‘I’ll put the keys in your room and throw this lot in the washing machine. Take as long as you want. I’ll come to get you if the police turn up before you finish. What’s more normal than a woman taking a shower? And if they’re blokes, you should come out wrapped in a skimpy towel, flash a bit of leg, get their attention. It’ll be a nice distraction. Let’s see them concentrate after that. It works for me.’
Beth stood there, not moving an inch as the water continued to flow. For a moment she was back there on that country lane. Sitting in the car, hands on the steering wheel with a white-knuckle grip, hurtling towards a man she’d never met, let alone spoken to. Her blue eyes blinked uncontrollably. ‘I’m just glad it’s all over. I keep seeing his face. It’s like it’s imprinted on my brain forever. My cross to bear.’
‘You’ve done well, Beth. I keep saying it. Louise is going to be so very pleased. Harper made her life a total misery. You did it for her, and for her little girl too. Can you imagine what she went through? The bastard deserved to die. We were all agreed on that, every single one of us. The verdict was one hundred per cent unanimous. Don’t give Harper a second’s sympathy. He doesn’t deserve it. He brought nothing but misery to the world. He never cared for anyone but himself.’
Beth washed away the last of the sweet-scented soap. ‘I know, I keep telling myself exactly that. I said I’d finish him, and that’s precisely what I did, no more and no less. If I hadn’t, he’d have gone on to hurt other women and children. Men like Harper don’t change. It’s who he was. It’s what he was. Someone had to put an end to it. And that someone just happened to be me. What other option was there?’
Sue’s reply was immediate. ‘I’m only going to say this once, and you need to take it on board. There was no other option. You do not need to keep justifying yourself, not to me or anyone else. You’ve got nothing whatsoever to feel guilty about, not a frigging thing.’
‘Is that what you really think?’
Sue nodded, feeling as sure as she sounded, starting to lose patience. ‘Oh, for God’s sake, yes, a thousand times yes!’
Beth didn’t say anything in reply. She was still deep in reflective thought as she struggled to silence her conscience. That small but undeniable voice that still wouldn’t shut up.
‘Right, enough said. I’ll put the kettle on. Do you fancy something to eat? A couple of pieces of toast, perhaps, or a few biscuits? I’ve got some nice chocolate digestives if you fancy them? I picked them up in Lidl this afternoon. The new place is a lot closer than the old one.’
Beth stepped out of the shower cubicle, taking a sizeable pink bath towel from the heated towel rail next to the sink. She began drying herself, starting with her hair before moving on to her shoulders and then her arms. She shook her head. ‘I don’t think I could keep anything down. I can’t get his face out of my head. I can still see his eyes. He’s– he’s staring at me. I feel like puking.’
‘You’ve got to try and relax, Beth. A bite to eat may help. See how you feel when you’re dressed. You need to keep your strength up.’
Beth agreed, more to shut her friend up than anything else. She was increasingly tired with each minute that passed. ‘Okay, maybe I can force something down.’
Sue stopped, looking back as she approached the door. ‘It’s going to be my turn soon. Kim’s been shitting herself since the CPS dropped the case.’
‘Yeah, and then you’ll know exactly how I’m feeling. Talking about killing somebody is a lot easier than actually doing it. You’ll find that out for yourself soon enough.’
‘I’m not as sensitive as you are. Not even close.’
‘Yeah, yeah, let’s wait and see.’
‘You worry about yourself. I can look after myself.’
Beth began towelling her legs, starting with the thighs and then moving down towards her feet. ‘Have you decided how you’re going to do it?’
Sue shook her head, avoiding eye contact, weighing up her options. ‘I’ve got some ideas I need to sound out with the boss.’
‘Think it through with caution. Don’t just go for what seems the easiest option. I’m beginning to think using my car wasn’t such a great idea. What the hell was I thinking? It leads straight back to me.’