They guessed probably Carla had been hurt; she liked to do the weekend shifts, it meant she didn’t have to organise childcare for the kids, but they didn’t know if anyone else was in there. The arrival of the coroner’s van told them much more than their guesses.
Some slowly dispersed, but a steady few remained. Pete shuffled around to find a marginally more comfortable place on the wall; he took out his phone. ‘I’m coming home, Ailsa. They’ve gone.’
‘Good. I must have had half a dozen calls from Frank Sharpe, wanting to speak to you. Was it okay to tell him to piss off?’
‘God, I love you. You used exactly the right words. I’ll be home in about quarter of an hour, I’m going to tell DI Fowler I’m off, I’ve had enough.’
‘And Frank Sharpe? If he rings again, what shall I say?’
‘Piss off.’
Kenny fed the twins with beans on toast. Nobody wanted food, but he knew they needed to eat, even if it was to bring a little normality into the crazy world that had descended on them.
They ate in silence in the kitchen, all three of them occasionally lifting tear-filled eyes as they remembered better times when Lorraine had said, Only beans on toast tonight, I’ve had a really heavy day.
Jack seemed to be completely lost in thought, idly pushing beans onto his fork, and aiming for his mouth, not always successfully. Then he stiffened. ‘What do we do?’
‘I don’t know, Jack. And that’s all I can say at the moment.’
‘What about our exams?’
‘Shit.’ Kenny stared at his two boys. How could he have forgotten? It had been the sole topic of conversation for at least a year. ‘When’s the first one?’
Jack spoke first. ‘We start this week, Friday, then we’ve got a solid four weeks of them.’
Isaac confirmed he was taking the same first exam as his brother, but finishing the day before Jack finished his. ‘Mum said…’
‘Mum said what?’ Kenny asked.
‘Mum said she would take us to Alton Towers for a few days after the exams were over.’
‘Then that’s what will happen,’ Kenny said. ‘Now, things are obviously going to change. We’re all going to have to learn how to do washing and ironing for a start, but I don’t ever want us to stop talking about your mum, she’ll always be with us. Probably laughing at us when we turn your school shirts mud green or something. The next week or two is going to be really hard. The police will want to talk to us, to see if we picked up on anything, to see if we recognise anything about the bastard who’s done this to us, but stay strong, lads, and if you’re struggling I’m here, and so is Graham.’
‘What about school?’
‘I don’t want you to go in Monday or Tuesday – will that affect anything?’
Jack and Isaac shook their heads in unison. ‘No, we’re basically doing revision now, not learning anything new. We can do what we need to do at home.’
It amazed Kenny to hear his boys talk like this. His own school life had been spent planning how to get out of school without anyone spotting he was missing, and his exam results had been a joke, yet Lorraine had instilled a sense of worth into their boys, and both had university plans. He suspected that would be the dividing point in their lives; they had separate plans for careers.
He watched Jack walk over to the window. ‘It feels strange here now, Dad.’
Kenny walked over to Jack and placed an arm around his shoulders, realising with a jolt that they were within an inch or two of being the same height. ‘It’ll always feel strange without her, Jack. We would have found it easier to handle if she’d died naturally, but this…’
They heard Isaac sob aloud, and leave the room before hurtling upstairs.
‘You okay if…?’
Jack nodded. ‘I think he’s being sick. Go and help him, Dad.’
‘Mummy’s not coming home from work?’ Seven-year-old Daniel stared up into Graham’s face. ‘Not ever?’
Graham shook his head. He was struggling to speak, to find the right words to say to his children. He thought Kelly had grasped the enormity of it, although not the concept of the previous night having been the final time she would have seen her mummy. Daniel was clearly struggling with the facts.
The phone call to Graham’s mum had been hard, but her immediate reaction had been to bring the children to her for a few days, Graham would have some sorting out to do. Like you’ve never known, Mum, like you’ve never known.
‘Did he hurt Mummy?’ Kelly’s brown eyes, so like Carla’s, were overflowing with tears and yet Kelly seemed oblivious to them pouring down her cheeks.
No, he killed her. ‘No, sweetheart, he didn’t hurt her. Come here and let me dry those tears.’
Kelly left the security of the sofa and walked to him. Daniel followed, puzzled, only half understanding everything.
‘Now listen, you two. You’re going to spend a few days with Nanny Glenys and Grandy Eric. I need you to be really good because Grandy Eric’s been a little bit poorly, so keep the noise down, okay?’
They nodded solemnly. ‘What about school, Daddy?’ Kelly brushed away another tear.
‘I think you can have a few days’ holiday. I’ll speak to your teacher, don’t worry. Come on, let’s go and pack clothes for a week, then I know you’ll have enough.’
‘We will come back to you?’ Graham could hear the desperate anxiety in his daughter’s voice.
‘Yes of course you will. And I promise to feed all the animals.’
‘Even Lulu?’
‘Even Lulu,’ he said with a gentle smile. The cat was notorious for attempting to kill him by sleeping on the stairs, her grey fur blending in with the grey of the stair carpet.
Kelly leaned into him and sighed. ‘I want my mummy.’
‘I know, sweetheart, we all do. But we have to be really grown up about it, and do what Mummy would have wanted us to do, and that’s be strong and brave. Kelly, promise me you’ll take care of Danny, and don’t be a bother for Nanny and Grandy. You’re taking Daisy with you, so you won’t feel too lonely.’
Daisy, the tiny bichon frise, lifted her head in acknowledgement at hearing her name, then dropped her head back on to her paws. Life was too tiring for her.
Kelly looked at her daddy with huge eyes. ‘I promise. We’ll be good, because we have to be for Mummy. Will you be able to see her, Daddy?’
He felt a lurch in his stomach that was almost a kick. ‘I will, possibly tomorrow.’
‘Please give her a kiss from me and Danny, and tell her we love her.’
Graham stood, unable to hold back the tears any longer. He walked into the kitchen, sat at the table and sobbed. So many times he’d pleaded with Carla to leave Sanderson’s, and so many times she’d said no, she loved the work she did.
Graham thought of all the times they’d disagreed, his jealousy overriding everything, and he wished he could take back every damn word he’d ever said, every accusation he’d levelled at her. He hadn’t really believed any of what he was saying, he had been trying to absolve his own extramarital activities from any blame.