‘I just might,’ Emily threatened. ‘But I think I’d much rather talk to her mother tomorrow. How much have you had to drink?’
‘I haven’t been drinking.’ Millie dragged her hair from her face and eyeballed her defiantly. ‘What the bloody hell is up with you anyway? It’s not like I’ve been out the whole night.’
Enough. Emily saw red. ‘That’s it, Millie. No more going out during the week, no TV …’
‘What?’ Millie laughed, disbelieving.
‘… no mobile top-ups and no computer time, unless it’s for homework. Not until you learn to act like an adult.’
‘You have to be joking.’ Millie gawped at her, stunned.
‘I’ve never been more serious in my life,’ Emily assured her. ‘You can carry on up the stairs now, assuming you can negotiate them.’
‘God! You’re being totally unfair. Ben’s still out.’ Millie splayed a hand towards the front door.
‘He’s older than you,’ Emily argued, stopping short of pointing out that she would also always worry more about Millie simply because she was a girl. She was acutely aware that this was partly because of her own experience at the hands of the man who’d manipulated her and then taken what he wanted anyway when she’d said no. The fact was, though, that Millie was young, beautiful and vulnerable – more so for having been drinking.
‘I’ve only been at my friend’s,’ Millie retaliated, her cheeks flushing furiously. ‘I rang Dad on his mobile and told him I was going to be a bit late. He said it was fine.’ Her gaze went past Emily to where Jake was making an appearance now he’d finished talking to whoever it was he was perfectly happy to take calls from this late, leaving her to deal with their daughter. ‘Dad?’ Millie appealed to him.
Jake glanced at Emily, as she turned to face him, and then uncomfortably back to Millie. ‘I said it was fine as long as you checked with your mum, Mils,’ he said, at least backing Emily up.
‘Right. Thanks for your support, Dad.’ Swiping a tear from her cheek, Millie threw him a mutinous scowl, and then flounced onwards to the stairs. ‘I hate it here. I’ll be glad when I can leave,’ she growled, thundering up them, half tripping. ‘You treat me like I’m three years old and then expect me to act like an adult? How does that work?’
Shaking his head, Jake gazed despairingly after her, and then looked back to Emily. ‘She’s been drinking again, I take it?’ he asked, his face etched with concern.
It was a pity he hadn’t been concerned enough to come home when he’d promised to, Emily thought, with a mixture of fear and frustration. She so wanted to believe his car had broken down, but after seeing that email, she just couldn’t make herself. ‘Obviously,’ she said, now perilously close to tears herself. ‘That was one of the things I wanted to talk to you about tonight, but of course you had more important things to do.’
Jake looked at her, perplexed. ‘It was an emergency, Em. It’s clear we do need to sit down and have a talk, preferably also with Millie, but I had no choice but to go.’
Emily nodded, trying very hard not to cry in front of him. ‘I gathered,’ she managed, turning back to the stairs.
‘Em …?’ Jake called worriedly after her.
‘I’m going up,’ she said, a treacherous wobble to her voice. ‘Can you check how long Ben will be, please?’
Pausing on the landing, she took a breath, and tapped on Millie’s door. She wasn’t sure what she was going to say to her. She couldn’t apologise. She just wanted her daughter to know that she loved her.
Getting no answer, she tapped again. ‘Millie?’
‘I’m sleeping,’ Millie mumbled moodily, which Emily supposed meant she didn’t want to speak to her.
The tears fell as she went into the bathroom, bolting the door behind her. Was she wrong about all of this? Wrong to wade in so heavily with Millie, despite her gut feeling that she hadn’t been at Anna’s house? Wrong about Jake, despite her instinct telling her that something wasn’t right? She’d been so off colour lately, stressed and anxious, her heartbeat so rapid she’d felt it like an actual pain in her chest. Millie kept accusing her of saying things she couldn’t remember having said. She should talk to Jake. But he would want to examine her. Feeling as vulnerable as she did, could she bear for him to be that close to her?
‘Emily?’ His voice came through the bathroom door. ‘Can we talk?’
She wasn’t sure she wanted to, with her emotions so fraught. She could hardly avoid it, though. She would be the one acting childishly if she stayed in here. Taking a second to wipe her smeared mascara from under her eyes – make-up she’d foolishly reapplied when she’d thought they were going out – she braced herself and opened the door.
Jake was sitting on the bed, his head bowed, his hands draped between his knees, looking utterly exhausted. ‘Ben’s on his way,’ he said, glancing up at her as she came into the bedroom. ‘He should be here in five minutes. I’ll go down and wait for him and then lock up.’
Emily nodded. ‘Thanks.’
‘He’s my son too.’ He frowned pensively. ‘You don’t need to thank me.’
Emily’s heart caught in her chest, as it was prone to every time she was reminded what a good father Jake had been to Ben. ‘I know. I …’ She faltered. ‘I’m just tired. It’s been a long day.’ Offering him a weak smile, she turned to the dressing table to remove her locket and earrings.
‘Look, I am sorry, Emily.’ Jake met her gaze finally, albeit in the mirror. ‘Tonight was clearly important. I can see you’re upset, and I can see why you would be, but the call-out really was an emergency.’
‘I’m sure it must have been.’ Emily tried to keep the weary facetiousness from her voice, but couldn’t quite manage it.
Jake evidently picked up on it. ‘He had appendicitis,’ he said, his forehead creasing into a curious frown. ‘Ethan, Rachel’s little boy. I thought the appendix might be close to rupturing. I didn’t want to risk peritonitis, so I got him straight into the hospital.’
Oh no. Emily closed her eyes. She’d been a millimetre away from accusing him of using his call-outs as cover for an affair. All because of a silly email. She’d leapt to conclusions, but perhaps there was some other explanation she hadn’t considered. She should tell him about the email. How was he supposed to explain if she didn’t? The whole thing was ridiculous. She trusted him. Apart from that one blip in their distant past, which she couldn’t blame entirely on him, she always had. Turning from the mirror, her heart jolted.
Jake was on his feet, tugging off his shirt, his back towards her.
‘What are those?’ she asked, her blood running cold.
Half in and half out of the shirt, Jake paused and glanced over his shoulder. ‘Scratches,’ he said, looking at her cautiously as he turned to face her. ‘I got caught up while I was trimming the Leylandii at the weekend. I told you, remember?’
Emily stared at him. She didn’t remember. Her stomach turned over. She had no recollection at all of him coming in from the garden injured. Surely she would have? She scrambled through her memory. There was nothing. Nothing at all. She couldn’t even remember him being in the garden. But the Leylandii, they had been trimmed recently. Hadn’t they? Oh dear God. Fearing now for her sanity as well as his fidelity, a hard knot of panic twisted inside her.