I fetch my teddy from my bunk and snuggle my face into his fur, breathing in his familiar scent. My mother made him for me out of an old pillowcase before I was born, to keep her hands busy while Dad was working.
My conception was a surprise (or as Dad used to say, a “happy accident”). NASA hadn’t planned for any children to be born until the ship arrived at Earth II, so there was twenty years’ worth of food piled on top of the childcare supplies in the stores.
To make sure that I had a cot to sleep in and nappies to wear, Dad had to sift through the endless towers of supplies in the ship’s centre. Apparently, my mother kept trying to help. He had to make her stop, in case she hurt herself. Instead, while Dad excavated the depths of the stores, she spent hours sewing me a teddy bear. The fur’s starting to unravel now, but I still love it.
However much I hate to think about her, I can’t bear to give up my teddy. He’s a reminder of the happier times during my childhood. So I keep him, despite everything.
I’m still staring into space when another message arrives, this time from The Eternity. For the transmissions to arrive so close together, Commander Shoreditch must have written it as soon as he read the message from Earth. Despite my worrying, I note how nice it is of him to think of me like that.
From: The Eternity Sent: 30/07/2065
To: The Infinity Received: 08/03/2067
Commander Silvers,
I just heard the news from NASA. I’m not going to lie, I’m more than a little worried. Before I left Earth there were a number of ongoing political tensions, and I knew war was a possibility, but somehow I still never expected it – or thought that it might affect my mission.
I can’t really process what’s happening. It’s like the world has become a completely different place already, only a month after I left.
I hope you’re OK, Commander Silvers. This is a big thing – it’s perfectly natural if you’re a bit unnerved. I’m here if you need to talk. I know how much it can help to speak to someone, even if you know there’s no reply coming anytime soon.
Commander Shoreditch
I’m so tired of being abandoned. Commander Shoreditch’s message is reassuring, but it hasn’t helped. I’m exhausted, in every way.
Losing Molly is bringing back the awful feeling of when I lost my parents – less severe, but exactly the same. It’s this horrible drop in my stomach, like when the artificial gravity malfunctions and everything stumbles, tilting sideways momentarily.
Love takes so much energy, and it just leads to pain. I think it’s probably best for people to be self-sufficient. If I was strong enough to be independent, then I wouldn’t be so desperately lonely, I’m sure of it.
I just want someone who holds on. Someone who won’t ever let me go, whatever tries to tear us apart. Is that too much to ask?
I’LL HOLD YOU
by TheLoneliestGirl
Fandom: Loch & Ness (2042)
Relationship: Lyra Loch/Jayden Ness
Tags: Hurt/comfort, canon-compliant
Summary: Lyra gets hurt in the field.
Author’s Note:
I’m not sure why I’m sending this any more, when I know Molly won’t be able to read it.
“Jayden,” Lyra cried, grabbing on to his arm. “It hurts.”
Tears ran down her cheeks, mixing with the rain.
Jayden’s hands were pressed against her stomach, trying to quench the flow of blood from the werewolf bite. She could see it trickling between his fingers, staining his skin a red so dark it was almost black.
“Lyra! Don’t you give up on me, Lyra, not yet. I need you. Just hold on a little longer,” he said, pressing his forehead to hers. It was a circle of heat in the cold numbness spreading through her. “Lyra, I’ve got you. The ambulance is on its way.”
“I can’t…” she gasped.
“You can, Lyra,” he said fiercely. Teardrops clung to the tips of his long eyelashes. “You can do anything. You’re stronger than you realize. I believe in you, Lyra Loch.”
“We never even…” she said, thinking of all the missed opportunities, the almosts. They’d never even kissed, and now she was going to die.
“We will,” he said, and she could feel his breath, soft against her cheek. “We will. This isn’t the end.”
Then she heard the sirens, and summoned up all her strength. “We will,” she repeated.
fin.
DAYS UNTIL THE ETERNITY ARRIVES:
346
From: The Infinity Sent: 16/03/2067
To: The Eternity Predicted date of receipt: 20/06/2067
Hi Commander Shoreditch,
I hope all is well on The Eternity. I’m writing because I’ve been going through all the news articles that NASA has sent me over the last three years, looking for information about Earth’s political climate and cursing myself for not reading about it more thoroughly in the first place.
There’s been the usual political tension between countries for months, but nothing that I would expect to become a full-blown war this quickly.
Besides which, how could a war even have affected the DSN facilities that NASA uses to communicate with our ships? The telecommunication antennas are located in countries with very strong alliances – the United States, Spain and Australia. For them to suddenly engage in war doesn’t seem feasible. Not as I currently understand it. At the very least, NASA would still have access to the antenna in California. They should be able to send short messages regularly as the earth rotates and points the antenna in our direction.
In the past, NASA have filtered the information they transmit to me, leaving gaps in newspaper articles. I think they
censor out any media content with a personal connection to me and The Infinity so I don’t get upset.
It makes sense that they’d do the same for news about the war. I think they were trying to stop me from panicking.
You have more recent knowledge of Earth’s political situation. Please tell me everything that you know, even if your response won’t reach me for months. I can’t work out how the jigsaw pieces fit together in a way that explains this situation.
Romy Silvers
I wonder where Molly is now. I think I’m going to carry on sending her messages every day, along with any fics I write, just in case there’s a chance she’s reading them. She’d be worried about me if I stopped.
I just wish I knew if she’s still there. I hope Molly is waiting in the lab for permission to send me messages once the war has died down.
What has she been doing while her last message travelled through space towards me?
Is she dead?
DAYS UNTIL THE ETERNITY ARRIVES:
338
I think I’ve worked out a way to contact Molly. I need to get in touch with someone on Earth besides NASA. Even if they’ve stopped using their antennas because of the war, there must be someone else picking up signals, on some continent, in some other organization. If I can just get a message to them, they might be able to pass it on to Molly somehow. Then she can let me know if she’s OK.
I find a list of all the government space agencies around the world, and track down the coordinates of their antennas, satellites and space stations orbiting Earth. It’s a long shot – some of the organizations might not exist at all any more, or might have shut down their operations because of the war too – but I can’t just sit here and do nothing. I would never forgive myself if I didn’t even try.