“Practical training is good.” The captain nodded.
Miss Tunstell was taking enthusiastic notes.
Arsenic relaxed slightly.
Miss Tunstell cleared her throat delicately. “Returning to the proper order of questions… Do you know how to extract a bullet and tend a puncture wound?”
“Of course.”
“And can you stitch up a gouge?”
“Verra neatly, if I do say so myself. And bone setting is one of my fortes.”
“That’s good. That’s very good.” The captain slapped her hands together. Despite her fancy attire, a beautiful ivory dress with appliqué yellow flowers, Lady Akeldama wasn’t wearing any gloves. Interesting omission.
“Rue,” hissed Miss Tunstell. “You keep skipping ahead!”
“Sorry, Prim, do go on.”
“How about smaller household ailments and illnesses?”
Arsenic strove to be honest. “I’ve my education to call upon and a small library, if I might be permitted to bring that aboard. But day-to-day treatment is na my strong suit. Basic medicinals and such I keep to hand, of course.” She hoisted her medical kit up on the table and patted it. “But anything exotic and I’d need consult an expert.” She was thinking about foreign lands, and how many soldiers she had lost to malignant fever rather than injury.
“Did you say library?” Professor Tunstell finally spoke up. He’d a pleasant light tenor and a distinct Eton accent. Was he married to the stiff young lady? Nay, Virgil had called her Miss Tunstell, not Mrs, so he must be a brother or cousin.
Arsenic strove to correct any erroneous assumptions. “Only a small collection of slim volumes, I assure you. I’ve travelled extensively over the past few years, and havena amassed many books. They shouldna weigh down the ship overmuch.”
He gave a shy half smile, which turned him even more pretty. The smile wobbled, as if it were stiff from underuse. “Oh, we don’t worry about that. You should feel free to collect further. And you may store them in my library.”
“Oh might she indeed, Percy?” Miss Tunstell’s expression was all incredulity.
Professor Tunstell blinked a moment, as if startled by his own invitation. “Yes, I do believe I actually mean it.”
Miss Tunstell rolled her eyes. “Oh for goodness’ sake, what is floating in your aether today? You’re even more exasperating than normal. Where was I?”
“You were asking about my education and experience,” prompted Arsenic. She had three sisters, thus she knew how to keep a conversation on track.
“Yes, thank you, Doctor. I believe I’m satisfied for now. Besides there is Mother to consider. She said you might do in that letter.”
Everyone, including Arsenic, looked at Miss Tunstell in utter confusion.
Miss Tunstell waved an airy hand. “You don’t remember the letter? Something to do with Aunt Softy? No? Why am I the only one who cares about this kind of thing?”
“Well, if it came from Aunt Softy,” said Professor Tunstell, possibly sarcastically.
“Via your mother,” added the captain, definitely sarcastically.
Arsenic was confused. “Someone knew I’d apply?”
“Someone sent you the advertisement, didn’t they?” Miss Tunstell looked, if possible, even more prim.
“It was in the paper.”
“And that paper arrived opened to our advert on your doorstep, did it not?”
“How’d you know?”
“Aunt Softy works in mysterious ways. So does my mother.”
Arsenic wondered if her own mother had anything to do with it. She felt suddenly as if her life was being managed by others. Not a pleasant sensation. But she still desired the position and now she had something to prove.
The captain glared at Miss Tunstell. “You could have warned me this one had Aunt Ivy’s stamp.”
“I didn’t want to prejudice you,” snapped back Miss Tunstell.
“For or against?” The captain pursed her lips and looked at Arsenic with a modicum more suspicion than before.
“Who’s Aunt Ivy?” wondered Arsenic.
“The Aunt Softy connection. It’s best not to worry too much about such things. You know aunts, they will interfere given the slightest opportunity.”
“I have sisters, same difference.”
“Too true,” said Professor Tunstell, softly.
The two ladies sneered at him. Miss Tunstell is definitely his sister, and the captain probably a childhood friend.
Miss Tunstell returned to Arsenic. “May I please see your accreditation?”
“Of course, I’ve it here.” Arsenic popped open her medical kit with the activation button. It decompressed and spiralled up, showing off dozens of shelves and compartments, stretching three feet tall. It was a masterwork of design and function and had cost her a small fortune. Arsenic never resented a penny. She fished out the requested paperwork from its special sleeve under the lid. She kept it easily accessible. She was accustomed to having her expertise questioned.
Miss Tunstell gave it a cursory glance. The captain waved it off, seeming more interested in the auto-telescoping function of Arsenic’s kit. Professor Tunstell, however, pulled out an adorable set of spectacles and gave the paperwork a thorough read.
“Ruthven. Why do I know that name?” he asked, apparently of the paper, as he did not look up.
“Mother’s letter?” suggested Miss Tunstell.
Professor Tunstell snorted without looking up. “As if I read anything Mother writes. No no, it’s something else.”
Arsenic felt her heart sink. Her mother hadn’t been active for years. And never worked under the name Ruthven. She was, in fact, officially retired – although really, was that even possible? Still, Preshea Ruthven had once had a reputation. Arsenic’s family had endeavoured to keep Mother’s married name separate from her other married names, but it was difficult for a lady of deadly notoriety to remain entirely obscure.
Arsenic prepared to explain.
But then the professor snapped his fingers. “Oh yes, Professor Belladonna Ruthven, out of Dublin. She wrote that marvellous paper on the beneficial medicinal properties of digitalis when used in small doses. Does the medical profession run in your family then, Dr Ruthven?”
“Oh aye, I mean to say, nay. It dinna run in the family. I’m the only doctor. My sister Bella is a botanist. The micro-use application was my idea. I dinna have the patience for publication, so I let her write it up. Better if people know, aye?”
Professor Tunstell gave her his full unblinking attention. His blue-green eyes were large behind the small gold spectacles. “You let her publish your findings?”
“Nay. I merely mentioned to her that I’d success with small doses of digitalis to increase heart rate, rather than using it to murder people. Bella thought it a fine concept and looked into it further with me as consult.” Arsenic wrinkled her nose. “’Tis what she does. We deduced some verra exciting applications.” She knew she was about to start rambling, but they had. “To counteract constrictive breathing disorders. To allay sluggish speed malfunctions in the heart. Even atrial arrhythmias. Can you imagine?”
She trailed off because everyone was staring at her.