—Time to test out the water, yes.
With that he stood up. I threw off my T-shirt and together we walked into the water. He was a stronger swimmer and soon far beyond the breakers. I treaded in the cool water and watched him go. It’s right here he was coming back. The closest person to us was a distant blob. Pum-Pum Shorts swam towards me. I smiled and swam away. He ducked under the water then popped up right behind me like a big fish. His hands went searching. It was worth the wide grin he flashed that my swim trunks had vanished. Neither of us talked while we played, always vigilant because even the Caribbean Sea can’t cover our crime. Tension was rising inside me until his finger in my ass reached that spot, that fucking amazing spot. He flicked his head towards the shore. You should see how fast I was out the water.
Fear, anticipation, and horniness were surging through my veins. I had to smile to myself. The number of times I’d come to Maracas hoping for a little piece and never a damn thing. But this morning, when I came for peace, this honey trickled down my skin. Now see me hustling on the sand behind a strange man I cannot resist.
In the public changing facility was a long, wide bench down the middle. Lining both walls were cubicles with swing doors that didn’t lock. Apart from a mash-up pair of rubber slippers forgotten under the bench there was no sign that anyone had been in here today. Giddy with nervous excitement, I whispered that anyone could barge in and catch us.
—Relax. Nobody coming here this hour.
—You sure? What if somebody came in?
—We good. The beach wasn’t busy.
His soft voice contrasted with the strong push of his fingers from the top of my spine to my butt. The surge of electricity it brought was all the courage I needed to follow him into the end cubicle. He began kissing me all over then sucking me. Oh fuck he was good. But if someone walked in and found us we would get beat up today for sure for sure. We should stop. But I wouldn’t. Oh Lord my body was trembling with pleasure. I kept being on the verge of coming and then a creak or a thud would stop me. I wasn’t ready to take a knifing up. Over and over I almost came then pulled back. The tension got too much and I finally let rip. Every cell in my body was grateful to this brown sugar god. No time to bask in the feeling. I did a quick survey and listened for a moment. Coast clear. I returned the favor while he stroked my head and neck and in no time his body buckled and braced against the side of the cubicle. If things were different, I would have thanked him for making me feel unbroken, unmarked. Not here and not to a strange man you fucked in a public facility. Instead we showered quickly. Pum-Pum Shorts left ahead of me. As he did so a man burst in. That was close. As I rushed past our eyes met—mine petrified and guilty, his nasty and questioning. Talk about perfect timing and a whole heap of luck.
I hurried back to the shade where I had plonked my chair. The smell of fish frying at Richard’s Shark and Bake filled my nostrils. I must have that with a little chadon beni seasoning, garlic sauce, and slight pepper. Life was stirring on the beach. A young family arrived and set out their chairs and picnic within my canopy of coconut trees. Their little one ran to the water’s edge, dipped her toes, and ran back screaming that the sea was cold like ice water. My body spent, and my mind empty, I sat down and drifted in and out of daydreams. A group of pretty pretty, half-naked girls walked past. How different, how strange would it be fucking a woman? And to be clear, it wasn’t women in general. It was one particular woman and my closest friend. I love her as much as I can love anybody. In time the rest will surely fall in place. We’ll be a family. A real family. That will make up for everything.
The England football team are in Trinidad for a friendly. I hope they understand there’s nothing friendly about them coming here. I don’t follow football and even I know we ain’t making joke. Put aside all what happened long time when we were a colony. The thing that nobody in this country can forgive is how England throw us out the World Cup in Germany. But we’re waiting for them. Mr. Chetan’s taken Solo. The two of them were excited like Christmas reached early. When he was buying tickets, he asked if I wanted to go too. Me in Hasely Crawford Stadium with twenty-five thousand people? Thanks but no thanks. Besides, I was looking forward to being home alone. That was before I checked the date. Tuesday is November 2. Today is Sunday and I haven’t gone anywhere near Paradise Cemetery. I messaged Deedee. All I did was mention All Souls’ Day coming and she piped up,
—When we going to clean Sunil’s grave?
—Deedee, you is a godsend yes. I could manage by myself but I won’t say no to a little company.
—Pass for me. We only cleaning the grave today right?
—Yeah. Tuesday evening I will go back with flowers and candles. If we put out things from now it bound to get thief.
By the time we got to Paradise Cemetery the place was buzzing. If the dead think it busy now wait until All Souls’. Like all who weren’t taking in the football were weeding graves, lime washing tombstones, and generally making the plots them look nice. It’s a respect thing. In church this morning Reverend said that it’s only in Trinidad that All Souls’ Day is a thing for everybody. Christian, Muslim, even Hindu—all of we does be busy cleaning grave and lighting candle.
—Betty, I’m tackling from the middle go up and you clean from the middle go down.
—Madame Deedee, I know you since high school so don’t treat me like a stupid bobolee. You gone and choose the end with less weeding. Scoundrel.
—Hush and put your hand to work.
Rainy season was heavy this year and the grave’s well overgrown. Most weeds I could pull out with my hand but one patch like a tree had taken root. Probably seeds from one of the many samaan trees in this cemetery.
—Nobody ain’t bury in this plot next to Sunil. I wonder who own it.
—Me.
—What? You buy that?
—Sunil bought it long time. One for him and one for me. When my time come is right here I resting.
—No way. Sell it. Swap it. Give it away.
—It’s no big deal.
I turned and pushed my small garden fork into the stubborn roots of a weed. Deedee was quiet but I could feel a heaviness between us. We worked away for a few minutes. I said to the ground,
—He didn’t start off bad you know.
Deedee kept pulling up anything that had roots in the plot. I know she heard me.
—When I first met him every week he would show up looking proud of himself and hand me one or two fresh roses. At our wedding I met his neighbor and she told me all them roses came from her garden. No matter how much times she told Sunil no more roses he would keep coming back boldface boldface. And neighbor claimed she was the first to know when he was going to propose. That Saturday, instead of one rose, he asked her for all the roses she could spare.