“Oh, hello, dear. I still haven’t heard from your husband.”
“No.” Eva inhaled as she navigated the crowded sidewalk. She turned down a quieter street. “And you won’t. You see, he died about fifteen months ago.”
Tina gasped. “I’m terribly sorry. If I’d known—”
“Please don’t feel bad.”
Rustling papers filled the background through the receiver. “Well, dear, it’s highly unusual, but I can see about getting you a refund on his deposit. I cannot promise it, but—”
“Actually, I’d like to ask you something else.”
“All right.”
Eva stopped two blocks from the heart center. In front of her loomed a large cast-iron gate with a rustic hand-carved sign for East Side Garden. She drew in a shaky breath. “I wanted to see if it was possible . . . to run in his place.”
“Oh my. Well . . . normally we don’t allow that sort of thing, you understand. But perhaps . . .” Tina paused. “Could I place you on hold while I discuss this with my supervisor?”
“Of course.”
As Tina clicked off and elevator music looped onto the line, Eva reached out to touch the garden’s sign. A tremor ran up her arm. She’d discovered the free-to-the-public garden with thousands of gorgeous blooms in the heart of Manhattan when she’d first moved here. Back then, the garden had become a sanctuary from the smog of the city and the noise of life whenever she could sneak away from work.
It’s where Brent had taken her six years ago and proposed.
And Eva hadn’t set a foot inside since he’d died.
Peeking through the garden gate, her eyes located the stone bench where Brent had surprised her with a diamond that gorgeous May day, when the primroses were in bloom, their orange, purple, pink, blue, and red petals turned to the sun.
She’d thought it a sign, given the most common meaning of primroses: “I can’t live without you.”
Now these primroses—their primroses—lay dormant.
Some primroses bloomed twice in one year. Would these? Or would they keep their color tucked out of sight through autumn and the long winter ahead?
Eva’s chest physically ached as she sucked in quick breaths.
What was she doing? She had somewhere to be. And it wasn’t here. Turning abruptly, she scurried toward the heart center.
“Ms. Jamison?” Tina Landry’s voice interrupted her thoughts.
“Yes, I’m here.” The words punctuated the air in a desperation Eva hadn’t meant to convey.
“We are very pleased to allow you to run in your husband’s stead.”
Light from the sun bounced off the windows of a high-rise. “Oh, that’s wonderful.”
“So long as your husband’s teammates are amenable to the change, that is.”
“What? Oh, well . . .” Ugh, she hadn’t even thought about that aspect of the race, or to explain the full circumstances to Ms. Landry. “You see, my brother-in-law, Wes, died the same day as my husband.”
“Oh goodness. I’m very sorry.” Tina clucked her tongue. “I don’t see why we wouldn’t also make an exception for a close relative who wanted to run in his stead.”
Kylee had said she’d wanted to run a race for her dad, but 155 miles would be too much for a teen.
Hmm. What about Angela? She used to run, right? Her sister-in-law may not show much emotion, but last night Eva had glimpsed the same hopelessness in Angela’s eyes that Eva saw so often in her own reflection. Perhaps running this race would be good for both of them.
“I’ll have to ask. If I can’t find someone, can I still run the race on my own?”
“I wish I could make an exception for that, but we have very strict rules about allowing participants to switch from team to individual entrants, and a team must consist of at least three people. Now, if you started off as a team and one person was forced to quit during the race, that’s different. But we only have a certain number of individual and team starting spots—and as of now, they’re all full.”
Eva clenched her phone. “All right. Thank you so much for this opportunity. I’ll have to get back to you.”
“Please remember that the deadline to pay the balance due on the account is this Saturday. After that, we will have to give the team’s spot to the first alternates.”
“I understand. And thank you again.”
Eva arrived at the heart center, and her eyes followed the white concrete walls up, up, up toward the cloudless sky. Should she just go inside, forget this whole thing? It’s not like doing the race would be easy. Eva was a yogi and enjoyed a hard-won spin class, but she’d never run long distances. Three, four miles tops at a time.
Images of gorgeous New Zealand flashed through her mind: the snowcapped peaks, the azure lakes, the green hills, the orange sun bringing all the flora and fauna to life.
Wild country brimming with possibility. Growth. Newness.
Color.
A place she’d wanted to experience with Brent. Maybe there she’d finally sense him with her again.
Eva called Angela.
When her sister-in-law answered, Eva launched into a quick explanation of her phone call with Tina. She finished talking. And waited. But only silence met her.
“Angela? You there?”
Finally, a laugh that was far more caustic than happy puffed across the phone line. “So you want us to run an ultra-marathon. One hundred and something miles. Halfway around the world. Six months from now. You’re crazy.”
Hurt bloomed in Eva’s heart. “I don’t think it’s so crazy. And yes, you, me, and Marc.” She hadn’t even asked Marc, but knew he’d be up for it. It was for Brent, after all.
“Eva, I haven’t run in years. That’s a lot of work even for someone who is in the best running shape of their life.”
“You might be surprised how quickly it comes back. Also, we don’t have to actually run. Just walk twentysomething miles a day. You could do that. Don’t you already walk a bunch on your treadmill? We can add in some cross-training, jog a little, whatever. We’ll train together. It doesn’t matter how fast we get there. The race wouldn’t be about winning. Besides, Marc and I would be there to help you. We’d work as a team.”
Eva, you’re rambling. She clamped her mouth shut.
“Look, this is a fine idea for you if that’s what you want, but you don’t need me. I’m working forty-plus hours a week. I can’t be away from work or my kids for two weeks. I already ask Sherry to watch them far too often. And what about the money? I’m sure it costs thousands of dollars to fly over there, stay somewhere for the first few nights. And what’s the entry fee?”
“Money is no object. I’ll cover all the expenses.” Eva waved her hand in the air.
“Must be nice.” Angela’s words had an edge to them. “I’m sorry, Eva. That wasn’t kind. It’s a very generous offer, but it just won’t work for me right now. I wish you the best of luck, though.”
“You say I don’t need you, but actually, I do.”
“What do you mean?”
“They were registered as a team. There have to be three people to make a team, and the race organizers will only allow us to sub in a family member.”