Surely, I would know if he’s dead.
Whispered prayers tumble from my lips, words I learned in childhood that have given me solace throughout my life. God cannot fail me now.
And then I see it—like a divine apparition slipping through the night—
A shadow, moving in and out of darkness.
A man.
I clutch the curtain, my knuckles white, hope beating through my breast.
He is safe. He is home.
Perhaps they questioned him again. Berriz is the sort of man who plays with his food, frightening it to death before he feasts. What better way to strike fear into my heart than to toy with my father’s life once more?
The shadow moves again, not with the speed of a desperate man racing for home, but with a languid, feline ease.
A sliver of moonlight illuminates him.
Gold lace adorns his shoulders and the cap on his head, gold stars on his collar, a gold braid on his breast. Between the moon’s glow and his golden uniform, it appears as though he has been gilded. The metal on his belt, the hilt of his sword, his spurs all shine.
For a moment, I cannot breathe.
Colonel Berriz.
Berriz walks toward our house, up to the veranda. He pauses, glancing up and down the little street where we live.
For him to visit in the middle of the night, dressed in full uniform . . .
A knock sounds, intruding on the quiet night.
There’s a moment of hesitation—a desire to stave off whatever bad news he has likely come to tell me, a fear of being confronted by him once more. But he’s an officer, a Spanish officer, and in this time, in this place, he might as well be king.
I stare at the latch that holds our door shut, little more than a defense against the wind that threatens to leave it banging against the frame, hardly a comfort or source of security in these times. Wishing I could ignore him altogether, I reach for the latch, but before I can make my fingers do the deed, the door flies open and Berriz stands over the threshold staring at me. I’m unable to gather my bearings, to reconcile the sight of our flimsy wooden door listing drunkenly to the side, when he strides forward, invading my space, closing the distance between us as though he has a right to it, one hand on his sword, the other grazing his mustache, his medals gleaming as though he has groomed himself for some special occasion, the elegant effect at odds with the barbaric manner in which he has broken into our home. I can do little more than gape at him while he stares back at me with a gleam in his eyes that makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.
“You’re surprised to see me here,” he says.
I blink, the gold on his uniform nearly blinding in its wrongness, his words suggesting I have missed some vital moment that led us to this place.
“Do you—do you have news of my father?”
“I do. There are other matters that stand between us as well.”
“Has something happened to my father? Is he safe? Where is he?”
“Evangelina. Honestly. Perhaps the more prudent thing would be to ask if I’m comfortable, to offer me a seat.”
The instinct to be polite, to accommodate a guest in my home, is nearly second nature despite the strangeness of this entire evening, despite the urge to bristle at his heavy-handed tone.
“Would you—”
Before I can finish my sentence, Berriz slides into one of the chairs, positioning himself between me and the doorway.
My brain is sluggish, as though I am in a dream, or in this case, a nightmare, worries firing rapidly past me, my worry for my father, the irregularity of Berriz showing up like this, alone, without a care for propriety or my reputation, but each time I try to seize on one of the thoughts, they slip through my fingers like fine granules of sand.
“I wondered what you looked like roused from your bed,” Berriz muses.
My cheeks heat, a little gasp escaping my lips.
“Lovely,” he croons. “You’re so lovely. We will be friends, won’t we? It would be a mistake to make an enemy of me. I am a powerful man, and no one is in a better position to grant your father his freedom. Why, without my help he might be sent to Ceuta or Chafarinas, and then who would you have to blame?”
For an instant, relief fills me at the news that my father is still alive. But the words falling from Berriz’s lips bring a new wave of horror. The Spanish penal colony off the north coast of Africa is well-known for its harsh conditions. Disease is rampant, hunger prevalent, and the officials treat the prisoners there worse than animals.
“Really, Evangelina. You can’t ask me for information about your father, can’t expect my assistance, and think I want nothing in return.”
I feared we would come to this moment, and now that it’s here, I don’t know how to manage it—how to manage him. I resort to the entreaties that have thus far served me well with the Spanish soldiers I’ve been forced to beg for mercy. Although, I doubt Berriz has a better nature.
“Please. My father is all we have left. He is a good man. He’s a soldier like you. He was doing what he thought was right, fighting for his country, for his friends. Please spare him.”
Berriz laughs cruelly. “Why are you wasting my time with such nonsense? Do you think I went to all the trouble to dress myself in this uniform, in a manner befitting a royal reception, to be lectured by a Cuban rebel? You know why I’m here and what I want. It’s time we stop this dance and clarify things between us.”
Even if I wasn’t engaged to Emilio, I could never care for a man who has treated me and my family so abominably. There is no romance to be had between jailer and prisoner, not when Berriz holds my life in his hands with such callous indifference.
“I don’t know what you speak of, sir.” My voice shakes, but I struggle to get the words out, to convince him that he cannot do this, that he doesn’t wish to act in such a dishonorable fashion. “I don’t know what you want. I’m only interested in saving my father. I—”
Before I even realize it, Berriz rises from the chair and catches me by the wrist, his big hand encircling my fragile bones. He could break every single one of them with only the slightest effort.
“I love you,” he proclaims.
I shudder.
There is no love in his voice, only zeal in his eyes. How do you dissuade a man who believes he is entitled to what you’ve already told him he cannot have? How do you reason with such a man?
Berriz tugs on my hand, pulling my fingers to his lips.
The feel of his flesh against mine makes my skin crawl.
I struggle past the wave of nausea, his breath hot against my skin, his mouth—
My gaze darts around the room as I search for something to use against him, praying someone will come to my aid. Is Carmen sleeping? The door to her room was closed when I returned to the house after dining with Emilio this evening and I assumed she was already asleep. I open my mouth to call to her, but fear of endangering her, too, stops me.