She wanted to escape. But she could at least ask a few questions while she ate, she supposed. Maybe try to make sense of the madness they were all trying to get her to believe. “Everyone here has the weird titles?”
“Everyone. There are twenty-two of us,” Donna answered.
“There are definitely more than twenty-two employees here.” Cora pointed out the immediate hole in the story. “I’ve seen dozens more than that.”
Amanda chimed in. “They’re not real. Not…really real, anyway. They’re more like ghosts. People we collect or dream up. Zookeeper and Bertha the Bearded Lady both take in people who come to see them. But they aren’t…I don’t know. Big enough—full enough—to be one of us. I don’t know how to explain it. They’re not complete. You met Simon’s puppets, right?”
“Seeing as he tried to turn me into one against my will?” Cora cringed. “Yeah. I have. Are they really…people he’s trapped like that?”
The expression on the women’s faces were a mix of disgust and anger. “Yes,” Amanda muttered. “They’re very real. He’s a sicko.”
What a horrifying way to live. And a horrifying fate she barely escaped. She didn’t know if she should exactly thank Turk for stopping Simon since it had landed her here, but she still felt like she had dodged a bullet.
But maybe she had side-stepped a small projectile only to get hit in the face by a cannonball. “I might have a hard time believing a lot of this, but Simon being a sicko I won’t argue with,” Cora said with a faint smile that didn’t stay for long.
They sat in silence for a long time. She finally couldn’t let it last any longer. “Are you all really trapped here?”
“Yes. And you are, too. I…” Donna looked out the little window for a moment. “I hope you don’t think about it as being trapped. I know you’re scared. I know you want to go home. But this is your home now. We’re Family, and we can be friends. You can be happy here.”
Cora snorted incredulously. “After the week I’ve had? Have you met Simon?”
The two women laughed, and Donna nodded. She reached out and gently put her hand on Cora’s. “Ask us anything you need to know. And anything we can do to help you, we’re here for you. We’re Family.”
It was the second question she was dreading to ask, because she didn’t know if she could accept the answer. Not if accepting it meant she was never going home. “What happened to me last night?”
Donna combed her hand through her hair, scratching her scalp and ruffling the short, dark strands. She was beautiful, in that I-could-probably-break-your-arm-without-trying-but-I’m-just-so-cute-you-won’t-be-mad-about-it kind of way. Like a spunky bartender. “There are twenty-two of us. We’re not complete unless someone is in each slot. It doesn’t feel right for any of us when someone is missing. It’s like there’s…a hole. The zero—the Contortionist—had been empty for a long, long time. Thirty-eight years. Longer than it’s ever been empty before.”
“Why?” Cora kept eating. The hash browns were amazing.
Donna’s expression was troubled as she talked. She fiddled with a little saltshaker on the table. “We weren’t sure until this morning. After Simon mutilated Hernandez—after he turned him into one of his dolls—we were sure we’d get another Contortionist the next time the Faire returned. But we never did. It wasn’t until Simon killed what was left of the old Contortionist that…you came to join us.”
“Why did Simon kill Hernandez?”
“Which time?” Amanda grunted in disgust. “Doesn’t matter. Sorry. He claims Hernandez asked for it. The poor man wasn’t cut out for this life. He…wasn’t ever happy here, no matter how many years had gone by. He wanted to be free, and he got desperate. And Simon takes advantage of desperate people.”
Cora could attest to that. She ran her hand over her face and thought it all over.
In the silence, Donna continued. “So, when we have a gap to fill, another one of us can opt to Sponsor a new Family member. We can take a chunk of ourselves—our seity—and give it to the recipient. It makes them like us.”
“Simon didn’t want anything to do with it.” Cora sipped the coffee again. Thank God for caffeine. “Ringmaster made him.”
“Yeah.” Amanda shook her head. “We didn’t even know that was possible. It’s one thing when the new Family member doesn’t want to be here. It’s another thing when the Sponsor doesn’t want to be a part of it. Simon’s been sulking in his boxcar all morning. No one’s seen him since he dumped you in the grass last night.”
He came out in the rain to get me. I still don’t understand why. “So, he…can’t hurt me, without hurting that part of himself?”
“Right. He could make you into one of his dolls, but he’d permanently lose that part of himself in the process. Ringmaster’s betting Simon won’t do it for that reason alone. My guess is the mad fuck thinks he can get that bit of himself back someday.” Donna rolled her eyes. “Egotistical shit hasn’t ever once Sponsored anyone.”
“Why not?” Cora asked. “I mean. I lost a piece of myself when I came here. Ugh…I can’t believe I’m actually saying that.” She pinched the bridge of her nose. “But whatever. I don’t feel any worse for it.”
“You lost a tiny bit of yourself. Like a hair.” Donna spun the saltshaker idly. “He lost a finger. It’s a much bigger part, and…we only have so much to go around. Think about seity like a wick on a candle. We can add to our wicks with what we take from patrons, but once we’re out? We’re out. We start to fade away like poor Ludwig.”
“What’s wrong with Ludwig?” She furrowed her brow. “He’s still alive.”
“But not for long.” Amanda let out a sad sigh. “The poor man. He’s been here so long. He’s Sponsored so many people. He just doesn’t have the will for it anymore, and he has so little left to him. If you talk to him for too long, you’ll notice that there’s…just not much there. He used to be such a big, loud, boisterous man.”
Trent said he was calm and quiet. “That’s heartbreaking.” Cora chewed her lip. No wonder Simon didn’t want any part of it. He very much seemed to have the will to live. She didn’t blame him for not wanting to “Sponsor” her.
The two other women nodded. Amanda seemed the most upset. “It is. I’m not looking forward to when he goes.” The blonde folded her arms across her chest and leaned against the side of the fridge. “But he’s been with the Family since, what, 1826? It’s his time.”
Cora blinked. It was all still so hard to believe. “How old are you two?”
Donna smiled. “I came here in 1977. Amanda’s been with us since 1859. The youngest of us is Firebreather, who joined the Family in 1992.”
Cora looked up at the woman with a raised eyebrow. “The Faire was here in 1992? That was two years before I was born. I remember my dad taking me here when I was little, and it looked like it had been abandoned for years. He never mentioned it being back.”